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  • Waspie_Dwarf

    Outwitted by a small, black cat called Elsa.

    By Waspie_Dwarf

    I have a small, black cat named Elsa. She is good company, generally very quiet and very well natured (although not always so well behaved). We are, however, in a battle of wits over a chair, and I think I am losing. A few weeks ago a relative of mine moved and had more chairs than was strictly necessary for her smaller flat. The chairs are much newer than the ones I had and so she gave them to me. That is where the battle started. Initially Elsa was happy to claim a chair of her
    • 8 comments
    • 211 views

Gift of tears (When I was young I danced)

Gift of tears (When I was young I danced) Inside when young I felt lifeless/dead, no one knew, it was my secret, yet I found an oasis that watered my inner desert, a place where I could just be, a place of no thought, of simply being and yes moving. I danced My mind did not have to ponder, or fear, or worry, the music would enter my blood and it would catch fire, I became weightless in the rhythm, borne aloft without exertion, like a bird soaring in the drafts without ef

markdohle

markdohle

Depressing Thoughts

Before you read this, understand I am not looking for pity or doctor recommendations. I just needed to get some thoughts out. Maybe some advice from someone who has been through this type of thing. I apologize in advance. Lately, I've been feeling depressed. By lately, I mean for a few years now. It has gotten to the point where I want to see a therapist or something to find out if I really have depression or I'm just like everyone else at my age. But then I remember that I don't have much spen

Xanthurion2

Xanthurion2

Boating - Chapter 8

Cloney watches helplessly from the roof of a distant hut as Zarkor's brain is about to be plucked from inside his skull. There is nothing he can do to help poor Zarkor, there are too many natives on guard. Slowly, meticulously and horribly, the blades of Slog’s vile brain extracting machine descend nearer and nearer to Zarkor's skull. Zarkor struggles in his bonds but is unable to set himself free. Finally, with a sense of dreadful inevitability, Zarkor’s body stiffens in inexorable and hopeles

StarMountainKid

StarMountainKid

Letting things settle down

Being a Christian is more than just an instantaneous conversion - it is a daily process whereby you grow to be more and more like Christ.---Billy Graham Letting things settle down People sometimes come to our retreat house that have had a powerful conversion experience in their lives and need a place to let things settle. It is often unsettling, for the action of grace in anyone’s life that suddenly becomes something real, alive, powerful and life changing, can cause a sense of vertigo. Ma

markdohle

markdohle

Proof! "You can't handle the Proof. Really!"

So we want proof? We all want proof, It's in our genes. I want proof that my wife is cheating on me. Proof of that video of me going 25mph. over the speed limit. Proof that my wife loves me or still loves me. Proof, if God is for real... Atheist's want proof that God exists or there is life after death. (Get in line.) I grew up wanting proof of everything! Don't tell me this is real or why it works. Show me! I still question authority. Family, friends, news, work. Everybody, everything, al

spirit unknown

spirit unknown

The life of the soul

The life of the soul Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ. –C.S. Lewis Not everything can be figured out, yet, they have to be lived with in such a way that they do not cause unnecessary suffering in ones life. People often think that life should be easier once they have started on a path seeking God. We sti

markdohle

markdohle

‘Grief Retreat’ in January 8-10thth 2016

‘Grief Retreat’ in January 8-10thth 2016 Every January we have a ‘Grief Retreat’. It is a one of the more difficult retreats that we have. When people come they are struggling with their losses. In Jan of 2014 a young woman attending the retreat, wanted to speak to me about her journey after losing her daughter. She was intelligent, faith filled and able to express herself in an eloquent manner, both in how she spoke but also in how she was able to write about it. I was so taken by her

markdohle

markdohle

The agitated retreatant who was ready to ‘SNAP!

The agitated retreatant who was ready to ‘SNAP! (I always get permission before I write about a retreatant) It was about a year and a half ago that a woman about my age wanted to talk with me. One important lesson I have learned when dealing with the public, is that while there is a solidarity that links us, there is also unique depths that only God sees. She seemed calm when she came in and sat down. That is until she started to speak to me, and then it was non-stop for about 30 minu

markdohle

markdohle

Our old retreat house

Our old retreat house My first visit to the Monastery was in November of 1968. I was in the Navy and spent my months leave (vacation) here looking into a monastic vocation. I was glad I did. I fell in love with the place and community. At that time the Retreat House was brand new and had not yet been open. In fact I think I was the last person to use the old retreat house, which was in the wooden Monastery. The monks lived in the wooden one for about 15 years (1944-1960). I turned 20

markdohle

markdohle

A visit to Gatun

A visit to Gatun I think it was in 1962 when the Bell family moved in upstairs in building 522 in Gulick Heights. We lived in the bottom two apartments; very big family _R- US we were. Mrs. Bell lived there by herself with her three children. Leslie Bell, she was in my class, Lester here brother and a younger sister. Sorry to say I forgot her name, though I have not forgotten who she is, or what she looked like. They were a very nice family and I liked all of them very much. L

markdohle

markdohle

To give birth to Christ Jesus

To give birth to Christ Jesus "My mother and brothers are those who hear God's word and put it into practice." Luke 8:21 One day about a year ago one of the retreatants wanted to talk to me. As he was sharing with me about his life, I sensed an inner struggle that he was not able to voice. So finally he said, “I feel blocked in my walk with the Lord, frustrated and angry”. This man, lets call him Fred (he gave me permission to write about this), was a leader, in the militar

markdohle

markdohle

The Spirit works where it will

The Spirit works where it wills About 15 years ago I was talking to one of our frequent visitors to our Monastery Retreat house. Her name was Fran… she was an older woman, perhaps in her middle 70's. Very pleasant and she got along with everyone. One day she wanted to talk with me. She got right to the point... “I lost my husband 5 years ago. We were both atheist, but not the hard nosed kind. Any thought of God never made sense to either of us. Well my husband died of cancer and for some re

markdohle

markdohle

If truth be told

If truth be told The next day, after Communion, I heard the voice saying My daughter, look into the abyss of My mercy and give praise and glory to this mercy of Mine. Do it in this way: Gather all sinners from the entire world and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy. I want to give Myself to souls; I yearn for souls, My daughter. On the day of My feast, the Feast of Mercy, you will go through the whole world and bring fainting souls to the spring of My mercy. I shall heal and str

markdohle

markdohle

The Aquisition

Well, the deal's finally been done. Negotiations dragged on longer than expected, mainly because of a certain high official who held out for a more lucrative personal compensation package. Money changed hands - lots of it - influence was cast about, some arms were twisted, but in the end we succeeded. We bought Jesus from the Christians. We got it all, too: the copyrights, the trademarks, exclusive use of the images, the liturgies, the sacraments, the slogans, the philosophy, the Disciples, the

StarMountainKid

StarMountainKid

Boating - Chapter 7

Even I have to admit, this is a pretty exciting Chapter… As you may remember, Zarkor is being escorted to Slog’s execution compound, being held down by the natives. They arrive at a walled-in area with a machine at its center. Slog peers at the machine with a loving expression on his face. He explains: “Zarkor my friend, here you see my patented brain extraction device. It’s very simple in operation. You sit here in this chair, the mechanical arm covers your head and effortlessly and painlessly

StarMountainKid

StarMountainKid

What is central in the NDE experience for me?

What is central in the NDE experience for me? From time-to-time one of our retreatants will come up to me and want to talk about the Near-Death-Experience. This phenomenon is becoming more popular as the years go by. There are still many skeptics out there and they each have some theory or anther that will try to explain away the NDE….so far they have failed. As new books come out the mystery deepens and the studies continue to expand. I do not think this is going away. One day older g

markdohle

markdohle

Spokesperson?

Spokesperson? If anyone comes to me, I want to lead them to Him. Edith Stein If we get full of our own thoughts and fail to listen to the silence within, we will not point to Christ Jesus, but only act as a hindrance to others. A dogmatist fails to see the Spirit that works within their faith and can block many who are sincere seekers. It is sad that those on the fringe of any movement are often seen as spokesperson for the rest.

markdohle

markdohle

PSI and PTIO

This blog entry may seem somewhat disjointed, but I'm tired of trying to smooth it out as best I can, so I'll just leave it as it is. It's kind of long, too, but I think it's relevant in its own way, so I haven't cut anything out to make it shorter. PSI and PTIO I think most people follow the Philosophy of Self-Importance (PSI). You may or may not have heard of this Philosophy, but you most likely have witnessed its results. The major aspect of this Philosophy is that whatever someone is doin

StarMountainKid

StarMountainKid

Bad B Movies

Bad B movies People when they come to a Monastery they are surprised (well a good number are) that monks are normal men. I blame this on bad B movies; where the monks are shown peacefully walking around a cloister with Georgian Chant in the background…..all is peaceful and is at rest, perfect. Nor sure I would really like that….a lot of repression would have to be implemented, a lot of energy, so the peaceful atmosphere would most likely be depression. One day a guest asked me if monks e

markdohle

markdohle

One of the perks

One of the perks The retreat house is quiet at this time. We do have people here but not on private retreats. There is one group here, RZIM (http://rzim.org), who have been here before. They meet in one of our parlors and are very quiet and I have a lot of respect for their founder Ravi Zacharias. It is an honor having them here. We do have many interesting people come here, one of the perks in working in a retreat house. What in fact makes a Monastery ‘Holy’ are not the monks, but th

markdohle

markdohle

Not burdensome

Not burdensome The way of humility is this: self-control, prayer, and thinking yourself inferior to all creatures. --- Abba Tithoes Humility is based on the truth about oneself. So as maturity is gained our evaluation of who we are will become more real and down to earth. This allows focus on others to lessen over time and one day to be gone altogether. The thought of being less or inferior to others is based on being focused on self and not on others. This sounds like a burden,

markdohle

markdohle

What the Dark Night is not

What the Dark Night is not The retreat that Martha gave this weekend was probably her best one yet. “When God seems distant” was the theme and I would guess most people on a path seeking God will find themselves in the place in time. Some seem stuck there, but are they? Mother Teresa was in ‘the dark night’ for years, yet she continued her path towards union with God. St. John of the Cross stated that the closer God gets, can sometimes be experienced as an interior darkness. This is b

markdohle

markdohle

The silence of songs singing to me

" ."after your cry alone i said sorry, tell me, I AM watchstanding for you when i fell alone ground-caught & graceful took shelter and cried for you upon looking around I found a 3-year-old mix cd of august power to seal your heal for a die-well requires living the same way too tears of sorrow heartfelt & sent true power now releases yester' & 'morrow no strings between the two I AM Here With You before an image of a smiling you posed as the brightest lights su

Clarakore

Clarakore