Jump to content
Join the Unexplained Mysteries community today! It's free and setting up an account only takes a moment.
- Sign In or Create Account -

X2

  • entries
    67
  • comments
    147
  • views
    84,952

Just Some Thoughts


Xanthurion2

1,262 views

Well, I figure it's about time for another one of these. I can't bloody sleep anyway so here goes.

Things are pretty much the same as they were in the last couple of blog entries. I have developed the ability to speak more comfortably to people although still not quite at the level I wish to achieve. Same job, just less friends now. Some have left for bigger and better things, some have been fired. I'm working on making more friends; going is slow but it is going.

I am glad to say, I have rediscovered the joys of writing now that I have a good keyboard attached to a pretty decent laptop. Now I just need to rediscover the joys of privacy. That might happen if I can ever afford to move out of the apartment I'm sharing with my cousin and his fiance. Money is not falling off of trees at the moment so that might take a while.

I still have many problems, I still generally hate myself but I am trying to improve, for real this time. I've begun exercising and eating less and more nutritiously. I have random moments of what is probably depression but I don't want to jump to conclusions without being diagnosed by a professional. But they usually don't last very long. I am trying to just roll with the punches and look on the bright side of things but it is hard sometimes.

Sleep, I believe, is my only escape from this world of torment. But lately sleep has not been a good enough refuge for me. I haven't been getting enough hours of sleep and as a result do not remember my dreams and it seems as though I haven't slept at all most nights.

You know how people talk about "the one that got away"? Well, I finally know exactly what they mean. There was a girl at work. A beautiful, intelligent, amazing girl. But I waited too long to tell her how I felt. And now, I will probably never see her again. It still hurts when I think about her. And I still think about her all the time. I just hope she's okay out there. For her sake, I hope she doesn't feel what I feel for her because I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

I know I need to move on. I know I need to move. I know I need to get a better job. I know I need to get a more positive attitude. I know all of these things and yet, I don't feel the urgency to do them. They don't seem necessary to me at this time. But someday and probably someday soon, I will wish I had taken care of these things sooner. But that's a thought for another day.

1 Comment


Recommended Comments

StarMountainKid

Posted

It's good things are getting better for you. No all good things will happen at once. That's good, as then what would we have to look forward to? Also, we all have "one who got away" in our lives, usually more than one, so you'll get used to that.

In one of my Z&Z stories Cloney says,

“Yes, Zarkor,” Cloney replies, telekinetically wiping the sweat from his brow. “The only item I couldn’t bring was your custom made hydroelastic ultrasonic para-kinetic meta-comfort message bed with automatic consoling feature. It wouldn’t fit through the air lock.”

One of those beds might solve your sleep problem, especially the "automatic consoling feature". lol Maybe someone will invent one of those beds some day.

Until then we'll just have to get along as best we can.

  • Like 1
Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now