Befriending Fear
Befriending Fear
July 22-24 retreat
(Weekend)
Fear can be something good; it is there to protect us, to tell us when to fight or when to retreat. However sometimes fear can keep us from living, even from completing the simplest of tasks. Overcoming fear can be difficult, but to not try is to not fully live.
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Fear like all of our emotions and feelings is something that is at times needed. For instances, if you pass by a dark alley in the city at night, you may feel fear as you pass it by. It is a warning, do not go there! I guess you could call that the feeling side of fear. Something from without that evokes caution and is soon gone when distance is made away from the dark alleyway.
Fear when emotional comes from deep within and can be carried around for years. It can manifest as a phobia, which can cause a violent emotional reaction… fear of snakes for instance is probably one of the more emotionally powerful phobias. Phobias can be dealt with through therapy if they are severe enough, however that is not what we are dealing with here on this retreat.
I have a fear of small enclosed places. Not elevators or cars etc, but I think I would rather die that to get myself stuck in a pipe for instance. I go into a complete panic, no matter what I tell myself, my body gets more and more agitated and then panics and tries to fight its way out. It is a loss of control. Since it is a phobia about something that does not impact on my life, I do not feel the need to get therapy for it.
Fear is there to protect us. So it can save our lives. Fear can also limit us, imprison us, and make our lives a nightmarish. For others, it can keep them from living a fuller more meaningful life. Keeping them back from developing their gifts, as well as finding relationships that can bring deep meaning and joy into their lives…..it can affect work as well, the fear of taking on responsibility for example. This is what we are dealing with on this retreat…breaking out into a broader more meaningful world.
One way of dealing with fear of this sort, that is trying to protect from life’s variance situations…..is to ask the question, what good is fear bringing me if I allow it to keep me from stepping forward into life? What can happen if I do consciously stand up to my fear and move into alien territory? Do I wish to live in a self enclosed closet that is safe and warm, but suffocating and restrictive, or open the door and step out to see what the other rooms have to offer? Yes there is danger; in fact there is danger no matter what choice is made. It can’t be helped; it would seem that we are constantly being ‘pushed’ to expand our hearts, minds and our souls.
Our souls are made for growth into a journey that will never end. How we journey in this life, this one life, is so very important, for here we choose. If we are always successful or not, is not important… It is in our choosing, dying to our fears no matter what the cost, is what is important. If we were born to simply be safe and snug, we would have spent our lives in the womb, but we were forced out of that as well. At death, we are again forced out, through another canal of birth into another broader world.
The Infinite, the Transcendent, is calling us into relationship, one based on love and trust in a world that is fraught with danger, yet we are called to go forth. As we deepen our relationship, love and trust in the Infinite One who calls us, this relationship allow us to embrace whatever life brings without becoming bitter and fearful. It is always a struggle, with many failures, yet we are called to trust, get up and live as fully as we can. –Br.MD
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