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Moon Dance & Masquerade Party Report

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Taun

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"A report on the Moon Dance and Masquerade Party"

I finally made it back to the UM compound after attending the inaugural Moon Dance and Masquerade Party”… I am happy to say that the event went rather well for something of its kind... Aside from a few miscalculations, accidents, and sundry mishaps their was a “slight” temporal mishap that took a few days to sort out…

The pre-event was nearly as eventful as the actual event to the people that showed up to the pre-event in the eventuality that the event would eventually happen… Party goers assembled at the world renown UM’s Airship Aerodrome located deep in the Southwestern Jungles, most arrived by utilizing one of UM’s many excellent systems of public transportation, such as the buses, trains, covered wagons, high speed zip-lines, taxis and the ever popular Galapagos Tortoise shuttle system… Some even walked (it being considered the safer – and often quicker- method)… The vast majority of the party goers stood about – resplendent in their masquerade costumes, as they partook of the many snacks and beverages prepared by the Southwestern UM Chapter of the Grumpy Old Coot and Cootess League, as well as by the Toddlers Junta (an organization comprised of UM members under the age of 30)… Since most of the Coots and Cootesses have the best cooking and baking skills – but tend to forget details – and since the Toddlers tend to lack the skills and attention span – the snacks were rather…. um… memorable..

 

Travel from the Airship Aerodrome to the newly constructed Lunar Lounge and Dance Hall had been setup by the tireless efforts of the UM Bored of Tourism, Cultural Appropriation and Meat Packing, and (very nearly) right on time (ish) a fleet of Alien Space Saucers arrived to whisk the party goers away to the UM Lunar Lounge and Dance Hall – that had recently been constructed in Tycho Crater on the surface of the moon… The alien’s were happy to get the business as they have not had much to do since they were marooned here back in 1534 BC after helping the Egyptians build the first pyramids… (They lost that contract – and their funding for the trip home – when the Pharaoh learned that they had travelled thousands of light years with super advanced technology, just to teach his people how to stack rocks)… The Alien Fleet Commander Preet*Hwauk Buurrskftel (Jr.) was so overjoyed at the prospect of earning enough money to furnish his ships with fuzzy dice for the rear view mirrors that he lifted his long time ban on allowing his crews to intermingle with their human experimental subjects friends…

The Space Saucers made the journey to Tycho Crater in near record time of -6 hours, which allowed the party goers to attend the party, have a good time and get back home before they left which is a major time savings that the UM Council of Mods is investigating as a means of increasing worker productivity in the Data Mines…

After arriving at the Lunar Lounge and Dance Hall, Supreme Commander Preet*Hwauk Burrskftel (Jr.) released his mixed crew of Grey Aliens and BEMS (Bug Eyed Monsters) to attended the party as well as allowing his Fleets Marching Band to perform at the dance… The Band (known locally as the Toxic Troubadours) were something of a novelty to the UMers who attended as they tended to actually play the same piece of music together (at the same time) and were more or less in key and time – though the music was described as “Gravel sliding down a corrugated tin roof in a hail storm” it was largely considered as an improvement over the quality of music normally booked for these events…

Much fun was had by all – thanks in large part to the decreased gravity field everyone was dancing in – and in no small part by the mass quantities of alcoholic beverages served to the Aliens… (to be fair, no one knew that plain old tap water was an intoxicant to them – a large reason why they never quite managed to make their way back to their home world all those years ago)… While the UMers taught the Aliens how to Polka and Waltz, the aliens taught us how to do the “Aldebaran Five and a half Step”, the “Sagittarian Slime Crawl”, the “BEM Bugout” and the “Fulaxorian Frenzy”…

While the Masquerade part of the Dance was not a competition, everyone generally agreed that the best costumes worn were the “Giant Space Amoeba” worn by an Alien Crewmember (with an unpronounceable and unspellable name – called “Fred”) and the “Ancient Mummy Astronaut” worn by kmt_sesh… Later it was discovered that “Fred” actually was not in costume – and really looked that way – but no one seemed to mind – he looked awesome anyway, and kmt_sesh was actually just wearing his normal work clothes…

Eventually – as all things must (for some reason) – the Moon Dance and Masquerade Party wound down to its conclusion –about an hour prior to its start time… The many guests boarded the Space Saucers for the trip back home and in far less time than it took – they were back at the Airship Aerodrome, bidding a fond farewell to their new found alien friends… I’m not saying some romances were started, but names, addresses, phone numbers and DNA scans were exchanged by a few members…

The partiers were fortunate enough that their return was in time to greet their own arrival, and actually able to ask the very confused drivers to return them back to the Central Compound – while their earlier selves chatted with them for a short while and boarded the Earlier versions of the Alien Space Saucers to take the trip to the Moon…. Realizing that he now had doubled the size of his fleet of Saucers, the Alien Commander (and those partiers who wanted to return to the party that was about to begin six hours earlier) joined the earlier version of his fleet and he and his earlier self (reportedly) “Partied hearty” with a duplicate pair of female(ish) grey alien crewmembers… More than a few party goers actually got back on board the Space Saucers after being taken back home and re-attended the party – dancing, drinking and dining with themselves until the wee hours of the lunar night…

The second return home – which was made in the same negative time as the previous trip – created yet a third fleet (four times the size of the original fleet) – at which time the Mods stepped in and forbade them from returning to the party for a third time… While the largely partied out members (the original time line members – not their doubles and quadruples) returned to their various cells and oubliettes, the doubles, triples and quadruples were loaded up on a nearby fleet of cargo container ships and sent off to the UM research and labor division in Ulaan Bator, Mongolia… For temporal research, but mostly just to avoid the confusion of having four copies of every member running around – one version of most of us is quite enough!

A few duplicates did manage to avoid being shipped to Mongolia, and most made their way to the Old Creepy Forest and joined up with the Renegade Beer Balloon Fleet… More on this later I am sure!

So if you find a copy of yourself – or suspect that someone you are talking to is a copy of some else, please report it immediately to the newly formed UM Department of Consolidation, Confinement, Corrections and Confetti… Please ensure that you use the proper form (UM Form 657-334.716 – and make certain that you use a properly sharpened number two marking stylus on the clay tablet. All reports are confidential – unless someone asks us nicely of course…


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freetoroam

Posted

Quote

 bidding a fond farewell to their new found alien friends…I’m not saying some romances were started, but names, addresses, phone numbers and DNA scans were exchanged by a few members…

I exchanged my name, but any romance stopped when he mentioned probing!  on  the first date? shocking, he could have waiting til the next day, but unfortunately  I had to catch the Galapagos Tortoise back.

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tcgram

Posted

If you happen to see any of the aliens who were in attendance, please let them know that their version of the  "Fulaxorian Frenzy" is not to be done outside of the party.  I showed it to a friend of mine in a public place and now I have been banned from 3 groceries, 5 home improvement stores and was told I am permanently banned from all IHOP restaurants.   

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Lilly

Posted

Laughed so loud my dog looked up when I read this part: "Giant Space Amoeba” worn by an Alien Crewmember (with an unpronounceable and unspellable name – called “Fred”) and the “Ancient Mummy Astronaut” worn by kmt_sesh… Later it was discovered that “Fred” actually was not in costume – and really looked that way – but no one seemed to mind – he looked awesome anyway, and kmt_sesh was actually just wearing his normal work clothes…"

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third_eye

Posted

Oh dear ... I do hope the Renegade Beer Balloon Fleet don't end up deflated ...

~

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Taun

Posted

32 minutes ago, third_eye said:

Oh dear ... I do hope the Renegade Beer Balloon Fleet don't end up deflated ...

~

Not to worry.. They've abducted recruited enough politicians that they will never run out of hot air...

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Lilly

Posted

Oh good, I really enjoy the Renegade Beer Balloon Fleet...not that I'll ever go up in a balloon mind you. I just like the way they throw a party.

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Taun

Posted

2 hours ago, Lilly said:

Oh good, I really enjoy the Renegade Beer Balloon Fleet...not that I'll ever go up in a balloon mind you. I just like the way they throw a party.

Well... technically they're not balloons.. They are zeppelins, you know like the Hindenburg... So what could go wrong?...

 

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freetoroam

Posted

13 hours ago, Taun said:

Well... technically they're not balloons.. They are zeppelins, you know like the Hindenburg... So what could go wrong?...

 

We invented duck tape 5 years too late.

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third_eye

Posted

what's so wrong about using chicken strings ?

~

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freetoroam

Posted

1 hour ago, third_eye said:

what's so wrong about using chicken strings ?

~

Chicken strings? what like those on the thoings we sell? 

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third_eye

Posted

On 7/26/2017 at 10:33 PM, freetoroam said:

Chicken strings? what like those on the thoings we sell? 

Oh no ... those are for privileged and valued individuals such as your good self and friends ... and might I add they do look quite well strung on you ...

uhmmm ... va va voom ?

~

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freetoroam

Posted

5 hours ago, third_eye said:

Oh no ... those are for privileged and valued individuals such as your good self and friends ... and might I add they do look quite well strung on you ...

uhmmm ... va va voom ?

~

Strung being the correct term...i am still not sure which way round they go..but its ok  i will figure it out myself.:rofl:

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third_eye

Posted

2 hours ago, freetoroam said:

Strung being the correct term...i am still not sure which way round they go..but its ok  i will figure it out myself.:rofl:

'ere let me gives ya a hand ... or two ... no peeking ... I promise ... *focused glare*

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spud the mackem

Posted

How do I tell my clone that he is not the real me ???  he is busy eating my dinner at the moment

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freetoroam

Posted

7 hours ago, spud the mackem said:

How do I tell my clone that he is not the real me ???  he is busy eating my dinner at the moment

How do we know you are not the clone...when i say you, i mean not you, but maybe you, because the you you are not or maybe not you, might not be you. 

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spud the mackem

Posted

On ‎28‎/‎07‎/‎2017 at 11:46 PM, freetoroam said:

How do we know you are not the clone...when i say you, i mean not you, but maybe you, because the you you are not or maybe not you, might not be you. 

I know I'm not the clone because he only drinks water ...yuk...and I drink,  err... beer... but the water in the river Wear , is better than the beer here...so I'm not sure  

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freetoroam

Posted

6 minutes ago, spud the mackem said:

I know I'm not the clone because he only drinks water ...yuk...and I drink,  err... beer... but the water in the river Wear , is better than the beer here...so I'm not sure  

What you doing  up there, i thought you were heading south. But all the joy of boating, we are free to roam where we like. We have moved up river a bit and what a difference in the water, but will still not drink it, still a lot of geese round here and they poo ever re where.

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spud the mackem

Posted

14 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

What you doing  up there, i thought you were heading south. But all the joy of boating, we are free to roam where we like. We have moved up river a bit and what a difference in the water, but will still not drink it, still a lot of geese round here and they poo ever re where.

Hi FTR I went North to see Sis who had a bad fall, she's ok now, I;m back at Caen Hill Marina then off to Newbury in 2 weeks time for a work out on the locks (about 47) yeehaa.

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spud the mackem

Posted

2 minutes ago, spud the mackem said:

Hi FTR I went North to see Sis who had a bad fall, she's ok now, I;m back at Caen Hill Marina then off to Newbury in 2 weeks time for a work out on the locks (about 47) yeehaa.

Canal Water is organic as its full of Duck, Geese and Fish Poo,

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freetoroam

Posted

15 minutes ago, spud the mackem said:

Canal Water is organic as its full of Duck, Geese and Fish Poo,

Yes, but i do not have time to filter it. Plus there is oil, diesel, jeeeeze even caught someone emptying their elsan out in the lock once!!!!

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third_eye

Posted

Prime real estate ... that ...

~

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Taun

Posted

On 7/28/2017 at 10:18 AM, spud the mackem said:

How do I tell my clone that he is not the real me ???  he is busy eating my dinner at the moment

For those of you who might be stuck with multiple copies of yourselves (techinically they are not clones, just you's from a few hours in the future .. or past... or whatever...) you have several possible solutions...

1. Rat on them... Tell the local Inquisitor or High Mod for your cell block, about them and they will be whisked away to spend the rest of their lives as indentured servants in Outer Mongolia at UM's extensive Research facilities (just make sure you stay away from your cell or oubliette until they have been scarfed up)...

2. Come to an accord with them and share the daily responsibility's of both earning an income and maintaining your lavish life styles in the Lower Pits of the UM dungeon complex - rotate who works which day, and who parties...

3. Send them all off to work FOR you,  while they slave away at your normal day (or night) job (and the extras get their own jobs) you can recline in your hot tub eating bon-bons and cashing their paychecks...

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Solipsi Rai

Posted

COOL STORY, BRO! You wrote a pretty good tall tale...a sci-fi one. Keep up the good writing work. +

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freetoroam

Posted

56 minutes ago, Solipsi Rai said:

COOL STORY, BRO! You wrote a pretty good tall tale...a sci-fi one. Keep up the good writing work. +

Tall tale? Story?

i do not think you are taking this seriously enough.

 

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third_eye

Posted

sic the helium devil dogs on 'im

~

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