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'Boating' Part 2 - The Adventures of Zarkor and Zerak

Posted by StarMountainKid , 18 August 2011 · 93 views

the boating voyage continues.
'Boating' Part 2 - The Adventures of Zarkor and Zerak After an uneventful first day of sailing, and after Cloney made dinner and waited for Zarkor to finally wake up to serve it, night comes and the Captain and his mate settle down for a good night's sleep. As Zarkor drifts down into his bed in his cabin, Cloney asks if he requires anything else. "Let's see, I've had my cookies and milk, Teddy is here all tucked in...I don't think there will be anything else, Cloney. Good night."

"But what about the boat?" Cloney asks.  "I mean, should we drop anchor for the night, or what?"

"Do what you think best, Cloney," Zarkor answers.  "Get yourself a few winks and wake me at sunrise. I'm exhausted after my busy day. Just bring me my breakfast in the morning and we'll see what tomorrow brings."

Cloney quietly shuts the cabin door and returns to the pilot house. Shutting off the engines and dropping the anchor, he gazes out over the endless blackness of the calm sea. "I guess I'll go to bed, too," he says to himself. "Maybe this boating trip won't be as bad as I thought. It's kind of nice looking up at all the stars in the clear night sky. There are so many of them twinkling so pretty." Cloney returns below decks and settles into his bed in his small cabin. Soon he drifts off into a peaceful sleep.


An indeterminate time later Cloney is awakened by the loud sound of thunder. The boat is rocking to and from rather violently as well. Out of bed, he drifts up to the deck and is immediately greeted by curtains of pounding rain and continuous lightening flashes followed by the crashing of thunder. The little boad is being tossed about by tall waves in the darkness. He drifts hurriedly back down below and pounds on the door of Zarkor's cabin.

"Zarkor! Zarkor!" he shouts through the door,  "there's a bad storm outside, we need to do something!"

Still comfortable in his bed, Zarkor is clutching Teddy, oblivious to the raging storm. Cloney enters the cabin and shakes Zarkor awake.

"Umm...umm...what is it, Zerak?" Zarkor mutters, half asleep, "are we at The Happy Holiday Planet already?"

"No," Cloney says, "this is me, Cloney, there's a bad storm outside, get up!

"Wha...What? A storm? Well, shut the windows and turn on the inertial stabilizers. If it's another Expanding Cosmic Sucking Vortex, just let me sleep through it. That last one gave me such a headache I was sick for twelve Time Periods."

"It's not an Expanding Cosmic Sucking Vortex, Zarkor - whatever that is - it's a storm!..we're on your boat, remember?!"

Zarkor finally arouses to wakefulness. "What?  A storm? Stay calm, Cloney, I'll handle this." Zarkor thinks for a minute, then says, "Go the the foredeck and batten down the hatches, then go aft and belay the binnacle, then go larboard and secure the bowline and make sure to shift the ballast, and after that gaff the forecastle and scuttle the spinnaker! Quick now, boy!!"

Cloney rushes back on deck as the storm rages around him, the boat tossing helplessly in the rough seas. Confused as to what to do, he heads to the pilot house where the wheel is spinning one way and another furiously. Zarkor soon joins him. Looking out into the violence of the storm he says, "Cloney, why have you steered us into this stupid storm?! I told you to keep on course! If you would have obeyed orders like I told you none of this would have happened!" After a deafening clap of thunder, he adds, "So...what should we do now?"

"I think we should abandon ship, Captain!  We're sinking!"

Zarkor accepts this bit of news in his usual calm, rational manner. "Sinking! We can't sink! That would ruin our adventure to the nearest continent! What would Zerak think?!  Well, how do we stop this sinking stuff?"

"I'll go below and start the bilge pumps!" Cloney shouts over the storm.

"Good," Zarkor says, "I don't know why we brought all that bilge with us, anyway! Only makes the boat heavier! Must have been your idea, Cloney! I don't remember ordering any bilge before we left!"

"I guess so," Cloney replies disparingly, and rushes below.

Soon Cloney appears back in the pilot house. "There are no bilge pumps, Captain, and the bottom of the boat is filled with water!"

"A fine mate you turned out to be!" Zarkor says in exasperation.  "First you order all that bilge and then you forget to bring the pumps to go with it! Next time we go boating, Cloney, you're staying home!"

"Yes, Captain," Cloney says, dutifully, "but what should we do with all that water! It'll sink us for sure!"

Zarkor suddenly regains his composure, remembering he is a superior species. "It's simple, Cloney. Always remember it's the simple solutions that are the best. I know this because I'm the Captain, and the Captain is always the wisest man on a boat. Get some pots and pans from the kitchen and bale out the water! See how easy a solution that is?! Now get to it and everything will be okay. Oh, and while you're in the kitchen make me a ham sandwich. Easy on the mayo but don't forget the ketchup. Just a little lettice and only one slice of cheese.  And you might as well bring me up some coffee as well. I have a lot of work to do with this storm and all, and I want to make sure I'm fully awake and alert. After all, it's my responsibility to save us from this pending disaster. Go on now, hurry up. And don't spill the coffee."

Cloney hurry's away to the kitchen, which he discovers is flooded to about a foot of water. Realizing that a few pots and pans are not going to solve the sinking problem, he rushes back to the pilot house.

"Captain I don't think we can bale out all the water!", he says. "The kitchen is flooded and the water is rising fast!"

Zarkor considers this, "In that case we'll have to take drastic action!"

After a moment of silence between them, Cloney asks doubtfully, "Drastic action, sir? Like what?"

Zarkor looks around at the raging seas, the blinding flashes of lightening, the deafening thunder and the pounding sheets of rain splashing violently on the pitching deck. He turns to Cloney. "Maybe if we panic we'll come to some solution, Cloney! I've panicked many times in the past under similar circumstances and I've always survived to tell the tale, right?! It's either panic or a total catatonic seizure! I think those are the best courses of action right now!  Me first!!"

As Zarkor's eyes begin to roll up into his head, Cloney realizes it's up to him to save the day. "The lifeboat!" he shouts and scurries out of the pilot house to look for it.

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