Unexplained Mysteries Discussion Forums: Unexplained Mysteries Discussion Forums -> Mr. Sinister's Blog

Growing numb to all around me. Seeing the world through smudged lenses, nothing seems to matter anymore.
Dull emotions left by years of scars leave an apathetic soul. Which leaves me with but one question, what's to become of you and I?
You are my everything but if you bleed I fear I would not lend out a helping hand. If you died, I fear I would not shed a tear.
I would let myself drown into nothingness. No-one would hear my screams of torment and pain (in my secret place)
The hands of our fate bound and brought together. Yet I fear we lose each other more as each day passes.
And as the light descends and the shadows arise, another day with you is killing me. But a day without you is a millenia in hell.

If I looked into your eyes what would I see? If I gazed into the depths of your heart what would I feel? Would you hold my hand? Would you reject it? Is what we feel in the flesh an illusion? The illusion of progress. That empty illusion that gets us through another day of life. If I held onto a memory of you, would it keep me sane or riddle me with insanity? If I spoke to you would you reply? WOuld you sit silently listening to every word, or would you ignore all I say? The most painful noise to me in the world SILENCE. To not be able to hear your heartbeat. To not be able to feel your touch. Did I fall from your grace? Did I ever have it? For one question answered hundreds arise. The feeble mind unable to comprehend emotion the overbears the body. That stills the soul where it stands. When I quiver do you hold me in your thoughts? When I bleed do you as well? Or is all this pain for naught? All the pain in the world could not erase you from my memory. All the pain in the world draws me closer to you. Yet still you push me away. If your desire is that I fade into darkness and obscurity, I shall do so for you. Only if you promise that I could hear your voice, and feel you one more time.

There comes a point in this lifetime where safrifices must be made. Where one must choose there own path and stop treading on others. It's so easy to be tossed to the wayside by time itself. Are you a puppet? Are you a man?Are you a minion? Don't you understand? In this life the hourglass gets dimmer for us. Do we quietly embrace our fate? Do we say our goodbies before our time is up? I say mock fate as fate does you.
There's alot to be said for insanity. If it were not for the voices in my head I probably would not be so sane. How ironic that what others consider nuts I call a disturbing blessing.
How sad that what we lose (intelligence, friends, inspiration), is easily abused and taken for granted 'till it's gone.
Oh sweet shadow, envelope the sweet pink rose in darkness, so that even it's impurities cannot be seen. So that the light cannot penetrate what lies within. So that it's beauty is kept from others eyes to see. Along with your impurity.
Loved ones and foes beware, not of me, nor, god, nor, satan, but of your own potential. Like the pebble being cast into the pond, would you like to make a ripple or a wave?

For the few who have not forgotten Mr. Sinister, remember, he has not forgotten you beloved friends. Though it has been an aeon, a new age, a new dawn, since I have talked to some of you, remember that it takes more than insanity and time to forget a true friend.

Stay safe and sane.

The Vatican recently stated that it's okay for it's followers to believe in alien life. Yet they still do not believe in birth control. Using protection is a sin, having sex without being married is a sin, but it's okay to believe in Aliens. When will the VAtican realize that the majority of there followers (especially the new generation) are having more and more unprotected sex outside of marriage. This is a sin yet go on ahead and believe in aliens. SO much for priority huh.

It has become no secret that our world is in trouble, weather it's global warming, war, famine, homlessness, natural disasters etc. I have only one question. Is this all really part of Gods plan. To wipe out 10,000 and counitng in China, the thousands in Burhma(Myanmar),or the tornadoes striking the midwest killing a few dozen. I recently got into a chat with someone saying God has a plan for everything. What's his plan for those left behind to pick up the pieces? What of those who have nothing left, no family no home? What is God's plan for all this? If there is a God I cannot fathom why Goed would sit idly by. I find it hard to understand how a loving compassionate God could allow this. Now weather God is responsible for the weather is another question for another time. I just want to know why such a loving, compassionate God would allow to take so many lives (the ones that died may be the lucky ones compared to those alive in Burhma at the moment). Weather you're Christian, Catholic, etc. Is it not hard to understand how this could happen? How God could sit up there minding his/her own bussiness. Does God here the pleas of his/her chldren? Why are we that question God the villains? IS it not better to question than to follow and obey blindly? Some say God is all around us, omnipresent. If this is the case then God sees the destruction first hand and does nothing.

There will be many saying I do not believe in God therefore I cannot comprehend. Well, I was raised in a strict Christian upbringing. I prayed countless times to God, but I got the message loud and clear that God stopped listening to my prayers a long time ago. It's hard to know if God here's anyones prayers. Funny how some say God talks to or through them. WHat about those that devot so much time to learning Gods peaceful messages only to see destruction. Why are so many good people forsaken, while the evil inherit the Earth? Where is God to protect the meek from the savage?

All this pain in the world, still no answer. All the prayers in the world, still no answer. All the destruction in the world, still no answer. Apparently God is on vacation or gave up on mankinds ways a long time ago.

Again, I am not implying that God is responsible for global warming or natural disasters, but I am saying that he/she does not here the pleas of his children. If so why does God allow this destruction. Are we to enter another era of survival of the fittest?

Well I give up on asking God because it goes unanswered, maybe God has talked to or through you and you can explain why God seems to aknowledge no one that needs him.

Help me!!!!! I've aparrently fallen from God's grace or never had it.

aRE yOU rEADING tHIS?


wHY?

iT"S sUCH a lOVELY dAY, sEIZE iT!!!!!

Is it so wrong to want to see you writhe in pain?
Is it so wrong to find amusement in your demise?
Is it so wrong for me to want to see you bleed?
IS it wrong to chop you ego down to size?

IS it so wrong to want to take your voice?
To silence the world of your lies.
IS it so wrong to hate when it is our nature betray?
To bound mankind to evil ties.

DO you not understand the corruption of your way?
Do you not see the destruction one lie creates?
Who made you God among men?
A divine evil in man/woman permeates.

A stench of Godliness in you ever so present.
I doubt your God would condone such hate,
I doubt your God encourages such deception,
YET YOU SPEW LIES FROM YOUR "RIGHTEOUS" MOUTH.
(At least those of us cast aside by heaven know what we are)

Again I ask, what makes one person "holier" than another.
When one is called a blasphemer is it true? OR are they simply honest with themselves?
When one is called a phornicator, where does it begin? In the act or in the thought?
When one is called a perveyor, is it justified (Are we not all guilty to an extent)?
When one casts the first stone, is there another to stone that person?
When does human behavior begin and Carnal pleasure end?
Where is the "happy" medium between the two?
Where is sanity when it is not to be found?
Where is morallity when hatreds abound.

Are we not all guilty of one sin or another? Are we not all bathed in impurity?
Even the baptized are sinners. Even a soldier of God falls from Grace, just as a evil man can be "saved"(depending on your idea of saved).
IS our maker "one', "many", "male", "female" etc. Does it really matter?
All that should matter is the matter at hand. And that is the fact that you are granted life. Why spend it judgeing others when one should live for themselves.
A NEW YEAR, A NEW DAWN, A NEW HORIZON OVER THE VERANDA.
Does the sun shine upon you or do you still remain in the shadows? Embrace your gift! Embrace your curse! Simply EMBRACE LIFE!!!

Ode to Infernal Delight/Enchantress

Tasting the blood that drips off my lips
Licking the crimsom off your fingertips
(A strange desire that rises deep inside me)

I bathed in your evil and loved the delight
Of challenging sanity with all in my might
(It is this obsession that won't set me free)

CHORUS: Join me in sacriligious ceremony, Join me in unholy matrimony

And I looked through your eyes to understand what you see
But if I cut off your arms and legs would you still be in love with me?
(To dwell in the sin of your flesh is my destiny)

Carving my veins so u taste what's inside
Embrace my gift and all that I've contrived
(After all, hell on earth is meant to be)

CHORUS:

Veterans Day. A day that means so much to my family. To me. Veterans Day, a day I feel the most useless in life. I am the cast out of my family on this day (one of many days). My Father served in Vietnam, an Uncle in Desert Storm, Two Cousins currently in Afganistan, and a Grandfather that served in WW2. I was next in line to serve my country. Yet I was cast aside. Unaccepted. Considered mentally unfit to serve. A sense of failure and sorrow destroyed me when I was turned down. THe fact that my mental/emotional history did not help me. This sounds like a triffle but for someone who loves his country and as someone who's family history was in serving our country, I am dissapointed in myself. Every Veterens Day I think about the fact that I failed myself, I failed my family, I failed my last name, more importantly I am OF NO USE TO MY COUNTRY. Those that serve to keep this Country free and safe, are my heroes. RUnning to the frontline to ensure the prosperity of freedom I am forever grateful to you that serve for your COuntry. I only wish I was of able body and mind to serve.

Though this day reminds me of my failures I am reminded of the brave that are serving. Humble, I fall before you and thank you for your commitment and sacrifice. With all the affection that my heart can muster up I thank you all whole heartedly. And my thought are w/ those family memebers who have someone serving. The actuion of those serving express so much more than I could ever say.

HEROES YOUNG AND OLD, HEROES FALLEN AND THOSE ALIVE, HEROES OF TODAY AND OF THE PAST, THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU DO AND HAVE DONE FOR THE PROSPERITY OF THIS WORLD!!


Walking through empty corridors that echo silence, alone I wander. No noises, not a sound. No light but the candle that lights my path. This place is so surreal. IS this reality or a figment of my imaginatioin. Alone w/ my thoughts I walk alone.
A mirror stands at the end of the hall. It is this place where my solitude destroys me. I am hollow. I am pain. Looking through the mirror I see my past. I see my failures, I see my demise. Always hoping to amount to more than what I have, I realise that my life has served no purpose. My life has no meaning. I have left no mark in life. I have left no legacy. When I pass in this life I will be remembered only for a millisecond. Then when my souless corpse is dropped into the Earth I will be forgotten. The worms will have more to gain from me than anyone in life has ever recieved from me. A creature lost, blind, pierced in the heart w/ the spear of failure. Raped in my mind w/ delusion. WHat am I? WHat have I done? I am haunted by these thoughts. Why am I so useless? WHy am I nothing but a smudge of excrament?

I know it's wrong to wallow in pain especially when I should be praising those that serve this Country, but I cannot help but feel useless. I cannot help the fact that I am lost. I cannot help myself so how can I aid another? How can I serve my country in this state of mind? I AM AN ABOMINATION OF FLESH!

Dislcaimer: This is coming from someone with many personal demons. Take my words for a grain of sand. I love my Country, but this day reminds me of what I was refused and what my family and friends have done. This day is of great joy but of immense pain to me as well. Yes there are ways of serving my country in other ways, but the fact that I am the castout of my family that and I make a mockery of my last name I am disgraced, I am humbled, and worst of all, I am nothing.

Ahh Halloween. A time for the children to annoy elders for candy. A chance for teens to escape reality by becoming the costume they put on, and a chance for Grown ups to waste a large sum of money on candy.

Ahh Halloween. My holiday. My favorite darkness. My favorite masquerade. Dwelling w/ my own kind. All in one location, invoking the same spirit.


Last night, Halloween 31, 2007 a phenominal night of Music, sex, drugs, and just about any carnal delight one can surmise to. As the first band, GORGEOUS FRANKENSTEIN began to perform it soon became clear that the booze was going to be spilling, blood would be spilt, and clothes would be shed. Sure enough debauchery was soon to follow. As the band performed a stripper came on stage and performed and gyrated to the bands music. Making great work of the stripper pole that seemed to have coincidently been set up onstage. Absolutely delightful ( Especially since I was only 15 feet away from the stage). Their set list was short but the songs and performance was great so I can't complain. The music being a nice mix or horror and punk along w/ a little bit of thrash for good measure.
Did I mention the ladies dresed in there scimpy outfits was awesome?

The next artist was a group called HIGH ON FIRE. One word. DYNAMIC. This band is by far one of the most underated bands that deserve alot more recognition than they recieve. I myself did not know too much about the band. But the lyrics are as complex and gutteral as the music. Bombastic drumming and excellent guitar work and precisive bass playing sholwed me that this band will go far. Not another joke or fake. Soulful yet destructive lyrics soar above the music culminating in a force that is speechless. Anyone interested in power/thrash metal would love HIGH ON FIRE (I.E. In Flames, The Haunted, and At the Gates).

Did I mention those ladies?

The last Band DANZIG (named after my favorite musician) put on as always a hell of a show. Glenn had a broken arm but was still running around and headbanging and getting involved w/ the fans. Todd Youth played some excellent solos, Bevan Davies did great on Bass and the drums were played with such precision it was scary. The evening ended w/ Doyle coming out and performing a short list of Misfits songs w/ Glenn.
Truly a night that will not be forgotten for years to come.

Oh And I can't forget to mention those lavely ladies.