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Hostel Movie review! **** 4 stars

Posted by EDW74 , 07 January 2006 · 101 views

Ok here goes........and I'm just as big an idiot as I was last time!

Our movie starts with 2 americans (Paxton & Josh) and a guy from Iceland or greenland (Oli) who says "of course my horse" a lot, not annoying, kinda funny He's also the self proclaimed "King of swing" blah, blah, blah. Movie starts of with our trio in Amsterdam, getting high, getting laid, you know what college guys do when they go backpacking in europe, I guess.

They go to this club, Paxton echoes my feelings about fanny packs to Josh, Josh gets into a fight and they get thrown out, so far the reality isn't that far off. They visit a brothel, lots of T & A in this movie which makes it a buy for me as soon as it hits shelves thumbsup.gif .

Our trio exceeds curfew and gets locked out of their hostel and end up going to hang out with these other guys. While some extra gets ridden by a rather attractive female extra  thumbsup.gif  the guy whose room they ended up in tells them about the women in slovakia?(is this really a country?) and how there are no men around because of the war, and how the women will do whatever the guys want.

They end up going to Slovakia (sorry to offend anyone from there if it is real for not knowing whether it is or not) Meeting a man with strange eating habits, who may or may not be (sexually) into Josh then checking into another Hostel (or hotel if you're like me and had no idea what a hostel was until this movie) where they find that they're sharing a room with 2 extremely attractive women (Natalya & Svetlana). I am going to say that seeing these two women nude is almost worth the price of admission in and of itself. grin2.gif .

Oli disappears, the clerk says he checked out, then Josh disappears when he leaves a club too early, Pax is all we have left and he just wants to find his friends and leave. So we begin to follow Pax around as he searches, He checks back into the room he was in previously and finds 2 different women staying there that invite him to the spa just as Natalya and Svetlana did. Pax ends up running into the girls again, Who now look like hell without their makeup, not that I felt they were any less attractive (gotta take the good with the bad right?).

Natalya tells Pax his friends are at an Art exhibit, and she can take him to them. On a side note, there is a gang of children ages from about 6 to 10 who appear throughout the movie and try to shake down tourists for candy, money ect. They'll come into play later.
Pax goes to the "Art exhibit" to find that it's nothing more than a place where people pay big money to kill other people(Yay! I love this kind of thing) notworthy.gif .

Prior to all this we've already seen Oli and Josh's fates, but I'm not going to ruin it for anyone, let's just say that it's not for the weak  stomached or feint of heart. There were points were I gagged (seeing someone vomit will make me gag). Pax realizes what is going on and gets strapped to a chair, a little psychological torture, more vomit and he escapes.

Let me backtrack to a subplot for a moment, There are these 2 asian girls at the hostel in Slovakia, one of them disappears the same time with Oli, so Josh and Pax ask the remaining asian girl to go to the train with them on the following morning to which she agrees.

Back to where I was.   yes.gif I AM GOING TO RUIN THE MOVIE FOR YOU HERE!   Pax finds the remaining asian girl and cuts off her dangling eye as she's had a blow torch taken to her face (Yes! thumbsup.gif ). They escape, with the help of the gang of kids who brutally kill (Children, young children committing brutal murder thumbup.gif Yes!) their pursuers, the girsl Nat and Svet? Well Pax gets to run them over, twice ( clap.gif  Outstanding) they Pax and Asian girl get to the train station where there are pursuers waiting for them.

IF YOU DON'T WANT THE ENDING RUINED DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER!!

The asian girl sees her reflection and decides it's better to kill herself than to go on living in her present condition (her face is really messed up and I think I'd have killed myself too, better dead than looking like that for the rest of my life, but I digress) She dives in front of a train (I love this film  thumbsup.gif ) granting Pax the time and distraction to get on a different train without being noticed. Pax is sitting alone on the train, he hears the guy who may or may not have been hitting on Josh (who did in fact kill Josh) on the train with him. They both get off of the train, Pax follows the guy into the Loo (Head, bathroom, restroom) and kills the guy, slitting his throat and burying his face in the toilet that the guy was doing his business in....all in all a great time and a new gore classic is born. I give this one four enthusiastic thumbs up    thumbsup.gif  thumbsup.gif  thumbsup.gif  thumbsup.gif

Ed

P.S. I wanted to say, so that I don't sound like a complete sexist pig, that I adamantly believe that of all the things that God has created that I have seen I believe that women are the most beautiful! yes.gif





Super Pancake
Jan 07 2006 03:52 PM
i did not want to read anything besides the first paragraph

I just want to ask how gory it is because for rated R I don't expect much.
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QUOTE(Super Pancake @ Jan 7 2006, 09:52 AM)

i did not want to read anything besides the first paragraph

I just want to ask how gory it is because for rated R I don't expect much.


This one earned an "R" rating.
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solvakia is its own country, its very very small though, i thought it was apart of the ukraine
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Super Pancake
Jan 08 2006 04:53 AM
QUOTE(EDW74 @ Jan 7 2006, 12:00 PM)

QUOTE(Super Pancake @ Jan 7 2006, 09:52 AM)

i did not want to read anything besides the first paragraph

I just want to ask how gory it is because for rated R I don't expect much.


This one earned an "R" rating.

I bet it did but could it have more gore then a movie with an nc 17 rating or a unrated movie like most of the ones I've seen.
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QUOTE(Super Pancake @ Jan 7 2006, 10:53 PM)

QUOTE(EDW74 @ Jan 7 2006, 12:00 PM)

QUOTE(Super Pancake @ Jan 7 2006, 09:52 AM)

i did not want to read anything besides the first paragraph

I just want to ask how gory it is because for rated R I don't expect much.


This one earned an "R" rating.

I bet it did but could it have more gore then a movie with an nc 17 rating or a unrated movie like most of the ones I've seen.


I think perhaps it should have had an NC-17 and cannot wait for the dvd to see what they had to cut to get an R
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