markdohle Posted December 15, 2012 #1 Share Posted December 15, 2012 (edited) Natural for us Giving from the heart is healing. While sharing from compulsion only adds to deeper hurt and inner turmoil. Two sides of a coin, the tension is what leads to greater growth in love, or the seeking after control. Control in the end is impossible, while growth in love is as natural for us as the rain that comes in the spring. Edited December 15, 2012 by markdohle 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashotep Posted December 15, 2012 #2 Share Posted December 15, 2012 You can't control someone all you can do is hope they love you enough to control themselves. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beany Posted December 15, 2012 #3 Share Posted December 15, 2012 You can't control someone all you can do is hope they love you enough to control themselves. You're much more positive than me. All I hope for is that I can control myself, which experience has taught me isn't always the case. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ultima Weapon Posted December 15, 2012 #4 Share Posted December 15, 2012 Call me synical, but after what I've seen within the vast history of the human race, I don't believe that "growth in love is as easy for us as the rain that comes in the spring." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beany Posted December 15, 2012 #5 Share Posted December 15, 2012 Maybe if history were written by women we'd be exposed to a lot more tender moments. Minute by minute, in millions of families all over the world, I'd bet there's more love & compassion & tenderness than anything else. But those would all be small stories, women's stories, mostly, that few are interested in. I believe Mark is right, growth in love is natural, but it's so quiet, private & intimate that we often don't see it, or when we do see it we fail to see its importance. Yeah, the world can be an awful place, today proves that. However, as we speak, people are comforting one another, sitting quietly with each other, millions are send out prayers, these are our unsung heroes. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcion Meets E. Sibyl Posted December 15, 2012 #6 Share Posted December 15, 2012 You can't control someone all you can do is hope they love you enough to control themselves. Being romantically in love has that effect on me, but of course, it goes both ways. Not to be able to control another's actions or decisions is quite humbling, definitely. It's a good thing because I tend to be more understanding, patient, vulnerable, "human," and cuddly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcion Meets E. Sibyl Posted December 15, 2012 #7 Share Posted December 15, 2012 I believe Mark is right, growth in love is natural, but it's so quiet, private & intimate that we often don't see it, or when we do see it we fail to see its importance. I can only speak for myself on this, but I certainly don't take anything for granted when I'm in love. How could I not see its importance! Sometimes one has to lose something to really appreciate its importance -- that's also true, and don't I know it. I'm in the middle of regaining my heaven on earth, so to speak, and becoming a raconteur as a result. In the end, it's beyond my control. I have set the wheel in motion and asking the Power-That-Be to make things deeper and united. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Greenman Posted December 15, 2012 #8 Share Posted December 15, 2012 I always gain weight when in love. Does than count as growth. I think friendship is the key to long lasting love. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markdohle Posted December 15, 2012 Author #9 Share Posted December 15, 2012 You're much more positive than me. All I hope for is that I can control myself, which experience has taught me isn't always the case. Yes, knowing that allows compassion for others ;-). peace mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markdohle Posted December 15, 2012 Author #10 Share Posted December 15, 2012 Call me synical, but after what I've seen within the vast history of the human race, I don't believe that "growth in love is as easy for us as the rain that comes in the spring." It is. Natural things are always diffiuclt. Like growing a garden, lots of work ;-). We get into trouble more often than not because we are still stuck with 'us' and 'them'. It is rampant in politics, racial matters and yes in religion. Peace mark I always gain weight when in love. Does than count as growth. I think friendship is the key to long lasting love. LOL thanks for the smile, stay off the chocolates Peace mark I can only speak for myself on this, but I certainly don't take anything for granted when I'm in love. How could I not see its importance! Sometimes one has to lose something to really appreciate its importance -- that's also true, and don't I know it. I'm in the middle of regaining my heaven on earth, so to speak, and becoming a raconteur as a result. In the end, it's beyond my control. I have set the wheel in motion and asking the Power-That-Be to make things deeper and united. Hmmmm very nice and touching as well. Peace Mark Maybe if history were written by women we'd be exposed to a lot more tender moments. Minute by minute, in millions of families all over the world, I'd bet there's more love & compassion & tenderness than anything else. But those would all be small stories, women's stories, mostly, that few are interested in. I believe Mark is right, growth in love is natural, but it's so quiet, private & intimate that we often don't see it, or when we do see it we fail to see its importance. Yeah, the world can be an awful place, today proves that. However, as we speak, people are comforting one another, sitting quietly with each other, millions are send out prayers, these are our unsung heroes. Your wisdom again inspires me my friend. peace mark You can't control someone all you can do is hope they love you enough to control themselves. True, love does make demands. peace mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashotep Posted December 15, 2012 #11 Share Posted December 15, 2012 Yes true love makes demands, women want romance and men want, well you know, and if one is made to do without the other will most likely have to also. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beany Posted December 16, 2012 #12 Share Posted December 16, 2012 It is. Natural things are always diffiuclt. Like growing a garden, lots of work ;-). We get into trouble more often than not because we are still stuck with 'us' and 'them'. It is rampant in politics, racial matters and yes in religion. Peace mark LOL thanks for the smile, stay off the chocolates Peace mark Hmmmm very nice and touching as well. Peace Mark Your wisdom again inspires me my friend. peace mark True, love does make demands. peace mark Hey, we're never going to see a headline like "Mother Sacrifices Own Well-being for That of Her Children" or "Father Cuddles With Children." Or "Neighbor Watches Over Neighborhood Elders or "UM Poster Advocates for Love."." but it happens every day thousands of times. It's just not newsworthy material. But you know, our lives consist of strings of small moments, and there, in that string, are the opportunities for wonderful & momentous acts that can reverberate for years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcion Meets E. Sibyl Posted December 16, 2012 #13 Share Posted December 16, 2012 I think friendship is the key to long lasting love. I think you're right, my friend; however, many people, including myself at times, blindly traverse into a situation. I agree with Mark on this score: "...the tension is what leads to greater growth in love," or it forces me to go deeper in myself and really follow the teachings of my spiritual practice. It's never easy, but I also find that my belief system helps me keep a clear conscience and trustworthy correspondence (at least on my side of it). So, why did my "friendship(s)" go awry...in general?? People are complex. Some are secretive, or into mind games. There's so much to say. Peace. Paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcion Meets E. Sibyl Posted December 16, 2012 #14 Share Posted December 16, 2012 Like growing a garden, lots of work ;-). Ain't that the truth! You must be an avid gardener, Mark. I stopped gardening when a love died -- long story. I may or may not take up gardening again, only time will tell, unless a new inspiration hits me over the head.Peace. Paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drayno Posted December 16, 2012 #15 Share Posted December 16, 2012 Control of oneself does not necessarily imply one is content with oneself. The path to peace and growth stems from accepting one's prejudices towards oneself and the world, but not seeking to correct them outright. By seeking to understand why we do the things we do, we can learn from our mistakes, instead of rushing to change parts of ourselves. Peace can be found in the decisions we make in the moment, or through how we react to situations in our lives.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcion Meets E. Sibyl Posted December 17, 2012 #16 Share Posted December 17, 2012 (edited) women want romance and men want, well you know, and if one is made to do without the other will most likely have to also. This man needs romance, tenderness, and understanding. I also want forgiveness for the disappointments I have caused, and to not be put on a pedestal (just because I'm spiritually inclined and so on). I suppose I'm able to say this due to my age (early middle age?) with my share of interesting life experiences ("I didn't just fall off the turnip truck"). Actually, people are complex, even the person one thinks is insignificant, or not in one's league. We are awesome, literally. So, the mysteries of love are quite transformative -- I'm finding out more and more. How could love not change our lives if it were from God, or God, Itself? Many say that our soul is made of God, right? From the many posts I've read on this website, I believe our tightly held beliefs are constantly being challenged by this all-embracing love (God) inside us. Just sharing. Peace to you, Hilander. Paul Edited December 17, 2012 by braveone2u Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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