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Can we make ourselves happier?


Still Waters

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Can we make ourselves happier? According to studies from all over the globe collated by the World Happiness Database in Rotterdam, we can. But the path to happiness may not be where we are looking for it.

http://www.bbc.co.uk...gazine-23097143

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Yes I find many things that make me happy...

and I do them. Or I think a certain way or sing a certain song

and get my whole body and spirit in a state of well being every morning...

from there I keep the good vibe going till it's time to sleep.

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I'm happy and have always been happy; in grade school "happy" was my nickname.

One thing in the article that I noted was that purpose or goal is not happiness; that is, we can float through life with no goals whatever and be happy. I would emphasize that -- the desire to get somewhere and be something leads to unhappiness when we are frustrated and unhappiness when we aren't (successful people are rarely happy -- it's unpleasant at the top of the hill). Of course with no ambition we may be hungry, but we will be happily hungry.

Force your face into a smile: it makes you happy. Or play some really schmaltzy music like Andre Rieu and then dance around the room.

I've also been depressed (there is a name for extremists like myself -- manic). Pills do the trick for me here, and I don't have the usual Western superstition about them -- its all chemistry, and the unwinnable "drug wars" would go away if people weren't so stiff on the subject and would just declare victory and evacuate the embassy. You just need to employ moderation.

The main drug for happiness though is family.

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From the article

"Though it is generally assumed that you need goals to lead a happy life, evidence is mixed. The reason seems to be that unhappy people are more aware of their goals, because they seek to change their life for the better."

So ignorance really is bliss.

It had Mexico as number 7 in the top ten happiest countries. The US didn't even make it on that list. So why do Mexicans keep wanting to come here?

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Force your face into a smile: it makes you happy.

I tried that but it never made me happy because I knew it was all fake.

Fake smile is still fake.

Anyways I really didn't see anything new in the article that hasn't been said before..basically another article telling you what you have to do to be "happy". Do this, do that, be this way but not that. Want this but not that...be involved in this but not that...it goes on and on.

Basically "happiness" is a relative and arbitrary concept. For one person being in a room crowded with people makes them happy while for another it induces migraines.

The concepts and "prerequisites" for being happy cannot be a "one size fits all" sort of thing. It is personal and again it all boils down to personal responsibility. Sure, outside things can help but it has to be generated, to some degree, from within.

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From Still Waters link, I find these interesting:

"People who drink in moderation are happier than people who don't drink at all." While one is having a few moderate drinks, yes that would make one happier for the moment. Plus, one always has a happy time to look forward to.

"Having children lowers your happiness levels, but your happiness increases when they grow up and leave home." I think this is an obvious reason for increased happiness.

I am occasionally happy. Happiness comes to me unexpectedly and out of nowhere. Spontaneous happiness. Receiving good news always helps, though. If I try to plan to be happy, it never happens. The only way I can try to make myself happy is to try to forget everything. This sometimes works, but not always and usually not for any length of time.

For no apparent reason this morning I woke up happy. How long this feeling will last I cannot predict. If I can keep my mind quiet and not thinking, I may be happy for quite a while yet.

I would consider zombies to be pretty happy, as they have no brains to think of all the bad stuff that is constantly whirling around them, as regular humans have to put up with most of the time.

Just writing all this down and thinking about it is already starting to interfere with my morning happiness. I think we are all basically happy, but this fundamental happiness is drowned out by the challenges we must face as the day wears on.

"The day wears on." I believe this to be a very significant statement as far as happiness is concerned.

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From the article

So ignorance really is bliss.

It had Mexico as number 7 in the top ten happiest countries. The US didn't even make it on that list. So why do Mexicans keep wanting to come here?

The reason Mexicans want to go to the States is the same reason Vietnamese do -- currency arbitrage. You work for what seems little to Americans but translates into good money back home. However, as we know, money does not translate into happiness, and in fact often has the opposite effect.

I think philosophy is supposed to be able to show you how to be happy -- at least I've head that claim. It ain't so. If you think long enough you come to realize how pointless and futile it all is. Best not to think about it.

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I dunno but the trick [forcing one's face to smile] works for me most of the time, unless for some reason I'm really determined to feel sorry for myself.

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I believe that you cannot will yourself to be happy anymore than you can will yourself to sleep.

“Don't aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run—in the long-run, I say!—success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it”

Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

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From the article

So ignorance really is bliss.

It had Mexico as number 7 in the top ten happiest countries. The US didn't even make it on that list. So why do Mexicans keep wanting to come here?

Because that makes them happy :yes:

`

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From the article

So ignorance really is bliss.

It had Mexico as number 7 in the top ten happiest countries. The US didn't even make it on that list. So why do Mexicans keep wanting to come here?

The tide is actually starting to turn. I know a lot of Americans who are moving to Mexico because everything is cheaper. For what you pay for renting a dump here you can get a nice place and hire a maid.

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the article says mexico is the 7th most satifised country in the world. I really have trouble believing this. :td:

And an interesting thing the article said is that people who are actively engaged in politics tend to be happier. I can actually see that being true lol :yes:

Edited by spartan max2
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I'm happy and have always been happy; in grade school "happy" was my nickname.

One thing in the article that I noted was that purpose or goal is not happiness; that is, we can float through life with no goals whatever and be happy. I would emphasize that -- the desire to get somewhere and be something leads to unhappiness when we are frustrated and unhappiness when we aren't (successful people are rarely happy -- it's unpleasant at the top of the hill). Of course with no ambition we may be hungry, but we will be happily hungry.

Force your face into a smile: it makes you happy. Or play some really schmaltzy music like Andre Rieu and then dance around the room.

I've also been depressed (there is a name for extremists like myself -- manic). Pills do the trick for me here, and I don't have the usual Western superstition about them -- its all chemistry, and the unwinnable "drug wars" would go away if people weren't so stiff on the subject and would just declare victory and evacuate the embassy. You just need to employ moderation.

The main drug for happiness though is family.

sometimes family can be your main source of unhappiness

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One way to be happier is to stop caring what other people think about you and do your own thing. After all it's your life and and being happy should be first priority. B)

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we can't necessarily rely on somebody else to make us happy.

if we can't do the deed ourselves, how can we possibly expect anybody else to accomplish it?

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sometimes family can be your main source of unhappiness

Boy howdy, they can be a piece of work. I have friends who where abused by their parents. I tell them and smile, you get to pick their nursing home. I have been in rehab and it's its own kind of hell.

One of my friends has done very well to over come it, but you know, I can see it in his eyes and he is 45. I'll tell you it breaks my heart, same look as people who went through a bad war.

Not everybody in the world can be happy, stuff happens and sometimes nothing can be done. Happiness doesn't march in on silver platter. You have to make best of your situation. You have to, in the end, create your own happiness.

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At this point in my life, I am happiest when I am working on a simple home improvement project by myself with peace and quiet.

...

And an interesting thing the article said is that people who are actively engaged in politics tend to be happier. I can actually see that being true lol :yes:

Politics is almost the most depressing subject in the world to me.

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At this point in my life, I am happiest when I am working on a simple home improvement project by myself with peace and quiet.

Politics is almost the most depressing subject in the world to me.

yeah it gets pretty stressfull, but i think it does keep you kind of happy because it keeps your mind occupied and gives you a sense of purpose. but idk

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Boy howdy, they can be a piece of work. I have friends who where abused by their parents. I tell them and smile, you get to pick their nursing home. I have been in rehab and it's its own kind of hell.

One of my friends has done very well to over come it, but you know, I can see it in his eyes and he is 45. I'll tell you it breaks my heart, same look as people who went through a bad war.

Not everybody in the world can be happy, stuff happens and sometimes nothing can be done. Happiness doesn't march in on silver platter. You have to make best of your situation. You have to, in the end, create your own happiness.

Oh I know, I can't stand my moms husband, literally everything the guy does irritated the crap out of me, I remember when I use to have to stay in the hospital it was a relief because I got a break from the crap he gives off. It's like a bad vibe. Now since I moved out of my moms place it's easier for me because he's not even a thought in my mind. But he's just an A- HOLE.

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Feel excited about what will be here tomorrow and you will feel happy.

Yes, goals can make you have IF you keep focusing on unhappy you are that you didn't get what you want yet.

If you focus on attainable goals and feel the excitement of getting closer, then you can be happy in the excitement of it.

Edited by Arpee
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