Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 #1 Share Posted August 4, 2013 He collected a group of followers around him and told them to drink his blood, and then, when he was killed, he came back to life 3 days later. Or was he a zombie, since he also told his followers to eat his body? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rustygh Posted August 4, 2013 #2 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Are you asking in the fictional story of jesus was he a vampire? I guess not as he wouldn't have been killed by crusifiction if a true vampire. Zombie, hmm could be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #3 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Was Jesus a vampire, or a zombie? Or maybe a saviour or a holy man? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #4 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Are you asking in the fictional story of jesus was he a vampire? I guess not as he wouldn't have been killed by crusifiction if a true vampire. Zombie, hmm could be. He wasn't killed by crucifixion. He came back to life after 3 days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #5 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Why would a zombie want people to eat its body? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #6 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Why would a zombie want people to eat its body? He's probably more of a vampire then. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #7 Share Posted August 4, 2013 He's probably more of a vampire then. If vampire, I get the drinking blood part because some myths say you have to share the blood, yadda yadda. But eat the body makes no sense in either form. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #8 Share Posted August 4, 2013 If vampire, I get the drinking blood part because some myths say you have to share the blood, yadda yadda. But eat the body makes no sense in either form. In older folklore, vampires were a lot more like reanimated corpses than the romantic figures of current imagination. Eating human flesh was not beyond them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #9 Share Posted August 4, 2013 In older folklore, vampires were a lot more like reanimated corpses than the romantic figures of current imagination. Eating human flesh was not beyond them. Yes, I love the old stories; the vrykolokas, the jiangshi and all that. But it would seem detrimental for the creature for others to consume its flesh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #10 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Yes, I love the old stories; the vrykolokas, the jiangshi and all that. But it would seem detrimental for the creature for others to consume its flesh. They don't consume all of it, just a small part, so that they can become vampires too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #11 Share Posted August 4, 2013 (edited) Was Jesus a vampire, or a zombie? I'm an apathethic agnostic, and I still go with 'holy man'. Prove the existence of your 'vampires' and 'zombies'. Edit: Because you introduced them first. Edited August 4, 2013 by Likely Guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #12 Share Posted August 4, 2013 They don't consume all of it, just a small part, so that they can become vampires too. I still think so many consuming even a tiny piece would still leave notable marks or cause a detriment. Besides, we can't prove anything about Jesus, so, who knows? He could have been a shaved Bigfoot for all we know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #13 Share Posted August 4, 2013 I still think so many consuming even a tiny piece would still leave notable marks or cause a detriment. Besides, we can't prove anything about Jesus, so, who knows? He could have been a shaved Bigfoot for all we know. And yet, we know that if you only take small pieces, it will grow back. If you add it all up, Christians must have eaten countless millions of tons of Jesus every Sunday for the past 2000 years. Where does all this come from? Are there vast storage vats concealed under the Vatican, where Jesus's flesh is grown in petri dishes then sent out to every church, every week? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #14 Share Posted August 4, 2013 And yet, we know that if you only take small pieces, it will grow back. If you add it all up, Christians must have eaten countless millions of tons of Jesus every Sunday for the past 2000 years. Where does all this come from? Are there vast storage vats concealed under the Vatican, where Jesus's flesh is grown in petri dishes then sent out to every church, every week? You mean those crackers? Those are just symbolism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #15 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Yeah, maybe this topic should be relegated to the creative writing forum. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elfin Posted August 4, 2013 Author #16 Share Posted August 4, 2013 You mean those crackers? Those are just symbolism. Not according to Catholic doctrine. Accordig to them, it really is his flesh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #17 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Not according to Catholic doctrine. Accordig to them, it really is his flesh. Some people take symbolism too seriously? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #18 Share Posted August 4, 2013 (edited) Some people take symbolism too seriously? No more than some people take vampires and zombies too seriously, apparently. Edit: skipped letter. Edited August 4, 2013 by Likely Guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratte Posted August 4, 2013 #19 Share Posted August 4, 2013 No more tha some people take vampires and zombies too seriously, apparently. To each their own. This seems more like a... What's the word or phrase? More like... Poking fun? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #20 Share Posted August 4, 2013 To each their own. This seems more like a... What's the word or phrase? More like... Poking fun? Like I said, I'm an apathetic agnostic. But even to me, this seems 'aggresively antagonistic'. No more no less than others have subscribed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeWitz Posted August 4, 2013 #21 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Yeah, maybe this topic should be relegated to the creative writing forum. LG, you are being generous. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #22 Share Posted August 4, 2013 No more no less than others have subscribed. And maybe, in that spirit, this topic should be 'given a rest'? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rlyeh Posted August 4, 2013 #23 Share Posted August 4, 2013 He was both, he also kicked puppies. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted August 4, 2013 #24 Share Posted August 4, 2013 (edited) He was both, he also kicked puppies. You couldn't resist, could you? Edit: Now THAT was 'poking fun'. Edited August 4, 2013 by Likely Guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DKO Posted August 4, 2013 #25 Share Posted August 4, 2013 Maybe an Illusionist? Started off with basic distraction tricks, like turning water into wine. Stepped it up by walking on water. Then his major stunt was being crucified and coming back to life three days later. Not that different than David Blaine being encased in ice for days. But I agree this should be in the creative writing section. I enjoy tongue-in-cheek jokes but some people get offended easily. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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