8 replies to this topic

[keninsc]

For the last, oh let's see, fifteen years or so I feel like I have been on the dark side of some sort of really strange Karma and recently I've begun to feel that it may be coming to an end. Loss of career, loss of marriage, loss of contact with children, loss of health. Have had to work at jobs that years ago I would never have considered before.

Now, having said all that, I do believe I'm soon going to find myself coming out of the this darkness that has covered me up soon, but I was wondering if it's just wishful thinking or maybe something else.

Names Ken, age 55, live in South Carolina. if any of you get anything feel free to post it or email me if you prefer. Thanks.

[charmcph]

Hi Ken

Let me start by saying, you have a very strong will. If I may... can I see if I can get a connection to you?

I get....

Smoldering... smoke and I see this from an outside point of view as if I'm watching this smoke rise.
Anger built up
Pet bird.. parrot?
Princess... just the word?
Puppies... running around
Camping ...tent, woods etc
Tobacco field... I see the plants, big leafy brown
Chair on a porch.... rocking
Strong mind... as in your way...
Name Denise... spelling on this ?
Words ...big man?
Brother... Ben

Let me know of connection if any...if not am sorry couldn't help. But still want to say.... you've went through alot and have endured what most people would put them down! Keep up the fight and keep looking for the little things in life that help us keep going. I wish you happiness and good things to come.

[keninsc]

charmcph33, on 24 July 2012 - 11:07 AM, said:

Hi Ken

Let me start by saying, you have a very strong will. If I may... can I see if I can get a connection to you?

I get....

Smoldering... smoke and I see this from an outside point of view as if I'm watching this smoke rise.
Anger built up
Pet bird.. parrot?
Princess... just the word?
Puppies... running around
Camping ...tent, woods etc
Tobacco field... I see the plants, big leafy brown
Chair on a porch.... rocking
Strong mind... as in your way...
Name Denise... spelling on this ?
Words ...big man?
Brother... Ben

Let me know of connection if any...if not am sorry couldn't help. But still want to say.... you've went through alot and have endured what most people would put them down! Keep up the fight and keep looking for the little things in life that help us keep going. I wish you happiness and good things to come.

Not bad really. I used to smoke.....quite a lot, but have quit.......but still crave tobacco. I was angry following my divorce, I didn't want the divorce. Princess is a connection to my oldest daughter who's name is "Stephanie" which means Princess. Tobacco fields is where I worked as a child and teen. Denise is an old co-worker whom I became involved with before I met my wife.......still harbor old feelings for her, hey that happens. I am a large man, tall and I like to write, so words are a part of me. I have two brothers.....Hank and Roger. I'm told I have strong opinions, but an opinion you don't feel strongly about it's much of an opinion. LOL! I used to love camping and hiking, but haven't been able to either in recent years. Never had a pet bird but do have an old and dear friend who did for years. Damn thing used to taunt me whenever I'd visit. LOL!

I think you might have a bit of a connection going on there. Thank you so much for your effort, I know it's not an easy thing to ask someone for, so your efforts are very much appreciated.

I recall describing my last twelve years to a friend recently and I said it almost felt like someone had put a curse on me, but now I feel like maybe the darkness is passing. However, it might take a while to come all the way out from under whatever it was. I was always a good guy, never hurt anyone, at least intentionally. We do wind up hurting people at times but when I know I did it wasn't out of malice. Always tried to do the good Karma thing......even when the doing it caused me problems, but then Karma that you don't earn isn't worth much. LOL! I did recently discover an old lover is dying and that does upset me and brings on a myriad of feelings from sadness to anger to acquiescence. So there is some of that hanging around me now, but it's a part of the grieving process. I have to accept that my old lover will soon pass, the good news is we can say what we feel to each other before the end comes and it's too late.

[HeartsAreForBreaking]

I see a rickety old white house with a sizable man with white hair sitting on the porch in front and there's a withering but still alive garden patch out front. I don't think this man is you, but this man also had relationship troubles, and I think he's thinking about a woman name something like 'Eloise'. I also hear the song 'Desperado' by The Eagles, and I see a somewhat beat up red car. Did your dad or another man you know own a dog named something like 'Spotty' or 'Scotty'? I see a man driving a pickup truck with a mostly brown dog in the back, and the man is sticking his hand out the window to wave or something and he's wearing a ring with a green stone in it. Also, I get sort of a sense that you bought your wife some earrings for an anniversary, and later they were somehow part of an argument or tiff between you two. I don't know if any of that rings any bells, but in regards to your "dark times" I think all we can do at the end of the day is hope and work for the best.

[keninsc]

ScreamingSarcasm, on 25 August 2012 - 07:03 AM, said:

I see a rickety old white house with a sizable man with white hair sitting on the porch in front and there's a withering but still alive garden patch out front. I don't think this man is you, but this man also had relationship troubles, and I think he's thinking about a woman name something like 'Eloise'. I also hear the song 'Desperado' by The Eagles, and I see a somewhat beat up red car. Did your dad or another man you know own a dog named something like 'Spotty' or 'Scotty'? I see a man driving a pickup truck with a mostly brown dog in the back, and the man is sticking his hand out the window to wave or something and he's wearing a ring with a green stone in it. Also, I get sort of a sense that you bought your wife some earrings for an anniversary, and later they were somehow part of an argument or tiff between you two. I don't know if any of that rings any bells, but in regards to your "dark times" I think all we can do at the end of the day is hope and work for the best.

Ok? The man with the dog could possibly have been my Dad, unfortunately, I don't know much about my Dad and what I do know isn't good. The old man in the old house doesn't conjure anything, at least nothing I can relate to right now.

Now, oddly, the ear ring thing is a little spooky. I did buy my ex-wife and pair of lovely Jasper ear rings for a present once, no reason really or occasion, I just saw them and thought they would look stunning on her which they did, she never wore them after trying them on and when I asked her why she never did she said.....rather bluntly, "Because they're ugly." Talk about getting a stake through the old heart? In fact, when she left I noticed she'd left them behind along with some other things I'd bought her over the years.

The song "Desperado" by the Eagles is a song I never really cared for because it was about a man who could never let anyone love him. Personally, I've always wanted to find real love and thought i had at one time but as it turned out it was something else.

[starchild1976]

You're suffering depression..I know it doesn't take a psychic to tell you that.. but you need to realize this is depression. But there's also a door opening for change if you're willing to walk through. New insight is possible.. finding another way to cope besides feeling broken down, because that is not coping. Go out and try new and healthy activities. Talk to people. Read self help books. Go to the flea market or church or just take photos of the sunset. You need to have a spiritual break through and then, everything else will come. I feel it has started already slowly you're waking up to the life you meant to live.

[starchild1976]

And when I say you need a spiritual break through I am not trying to solicit any particular religion. The choice is yours, but it does help people often to feel renewed and perhaps you are already on a journey toward learning more about yourself. Take every hard knock in life as a lesson and begin to embrace a new social structure in your life. Think of it as an adventure.

[starchild1976]

Oh and when your mind goes back to the past fast forward. Learn from the past by being a student of the present time being. The past is sometimes depressing I've learned in my 35 yrs. But it's important as far as what it can tell us to shape our future.

[keninsc]

I did go through a depression after the split, let's be real thirty years of marriage goes down the toilet like yesterday's lunch will bring you down, however I've pretty much made peace with it.

The "darkness" I described is something that I can almost pin point when it began, January 3, 1997. I recall there seemed to be a sudden unexplainable shift in the way I found people reacted to me and pretty much anything else and everything seemed to go straight down hill from then and culminated in my wife leaving me without so much as a, "Oh, by the way...." Fro the last four or five years I've been at a bit of stalemate so to speak. Couldn't move forward, not getting any worse, just stuck like a car in deep mud. Now I feel like things might be looking upward again. A number of years ago a friend who had certain psychic abilities told me that I'd experience this and that it would be the result of ..........a sort of curse that was sort of inadvertently placed on me by a jilted lover. Now I'm not going to pretend I understand this sort of thing and I'm not sure how you can put a curse on someone "inadvertently" and further how you can make it take if you really don't believe in them.

I recall having a "vision" for lack of a better term for it while I was meditating and I could see this huge, nasty dark storm rolling in on top of me. I also saw a friend who'd died when I was a teen. I found the vision so disturbing that I actually stopped meditating and have not done so since then, I think I might try taking it up again.......but I hope to avoid the vision aspect of it.

Now I have been seeing females here and there, haven't made any huge connections or anything like that and I thought one in particular had some promise, unfortunately, she "just wasn't feeling it". Hey, it happens. However, I'm just feeling like some positive things are coming my way, some have already happened, nothing Earth shattering you understand but positive and right now positive looks pretty darn good to me. Which is why I was asking if anyone could use their abilities to sort of confirm that to me.

You are right that starting over is a b**** to say the least, and yeah I have some emotional baggage that I'm aware of and very likely some I'm not aware of yet and that can be a bit of a stumbling block at times for anyone.

Thanks for your input though.