Here's my impressions: you're stuck in a rut because of fear. The fear is preventing you from making a couple of very important decision that may provoke negative responses from some friends & family. There's a change you've been wanting to make, but it feels risky to you, like stepping off the 30 foot diving platform when you're not sure whether you'll enter the water gracefully or end doing a belly flop. But enduring, living with the fear would be far worse for you than taking a risk, because once you take action you'll eventually know the outcome, whereas if you do nothing the tension will only increase. Trust yourself and your capabilities, you have all the basic tools you need to effect change, and once you take action, it will be the first in a series of chain (change?) reactions that will take you exactly where you want to go. Those around you are perhaps not as supportive as you'd like, because they are fearful for you, because of the fear & uncertainty you've expressed to them; they are a reflection of you. If you don't like what's being reflected back then you need to change the source, you. Tell yourself a different story than the one you've been telling, tell yourself the story of the hero's journey. Joseph Campbell reminds us that on this journey we always encounter at least one helpful person, maybe more, so know that you will have help along the way.
Edited by Beany, 21 September 2012 - 04:03 AM.