Grandpa Greenman Posted July 28, 2015 #1 Share Posted July 28, 2015 If you were charged with updating the 10 Commandments what would you change? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Nuclear Wessel Posted July 28, 2015 #2 Share Posted July 28, 2015 If you were charged with updating the 10 Commandments what would you change? All of them. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
questionmark Posted July 28, 2015 #3 Share Posted July 28, 2015 add the 11th: Thou shalt not get caught or thou will end thy days in jail! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandpa Greenman Posted July 28, 2015 Author #4 Share Posted July 28, 2015 All of them. To what? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenore Graves Posted July 28, 2015 #5 Share Posted July 28, 2015 get rid of them all, and add 1, Thou shall think for themself 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Border Collie Posted July 28, 2015 #6 Share Posted July 28, 2015 I would certainly think twice about the coveting thy neighbour's ass one. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnanimus Posted July 28, 2015 #7 Share Posted July 28, 2015 Uhh, we live in a federal republic. We did get the chance to write our own commandments and we use the opportunity to dictate, with an equal gravity, the punishment for a number of types of murder to the specified width of goddamn bike paths. And if you're looking, for a sexy, sleek list of under a dozen rules, that are super-duper special (for some reason), and more often used as a means for political divisiveness, rather than hallowed law? Wouldn't you know it, we did that too! It's the Bill of Rights; because the Founding Fathers knew that there could never be a set of our laws so important as ones developed reactionarily to British authority. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paranormalcy Posted July 28, 2015 #8 Share Posted July 28, 2015 For those familiar with the Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth... those. http://www.churchofsatan.com/eleven-rules-of-earth.php 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
some new guy Posted July 28, 2015 #9 Share Posted July 28, 2015 Penn Jillette's 10 Commandments for atheists...... http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/religion/story/2011-10-28/penn-jillette-ten-commandments/50978982/1 BEST - Ron 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XenoFish Posted July 28, 2015 #10 Share Posted July 28, 2015 (edited) You shall not murder. Unless life threatening violence in brought upon you or those around you. You shall not commit adultery. Unless thy spouse has also been unfaithful and ye shall divorce. You shall not steal. Unless thou art starving and it is food that you take. You shall not present false witness. Speak the truth to keep thy conscious clear. Edited July 28, 2015 by XenoFish 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubbly_Dooright Posted July 28, 2015 #11 Share Posted July 28, 2015 Humnnnnn, if I were to look over the original: The 10 Commandments List, Short Form You shall have no other gods before Me. You shall not make idols. You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Honor your father and your mother. You shall not murder. You shall not commit adultery. You shall not steal. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. You shall not covet. I got it from here: http://lifehopeandtruth.com/bible/10-commandments/the-ten-commandments/10-commandments-list/ Then I would change number one to, you should be true to the beliefs you hold in your heart be it not a belief as well. Number two: You should have respect and self-respect. Number three: You should never take your own name in vain, unless it turns you on. Number four: Remember to find your day, time, place, and need to Zen! (this one very important ) Number five: Honor those, who have deserved such honor. Number six: You shall not murder...........( Ok, can't disagree with there, but like the thought unless needed) Number seven: You shall not cheat, ................ unless it is entirely agreed that's it's an open relationship. Number eight: You shall not steal, (even if it's complimentary........... wait a minute............never mind.) Number nine: You shall always tell your neighbor you saw the other neighbor still your newspaper off their front porch. ( And other things that talk about being true to others. ) Number ten: You shall not covet................ someone else's sales clerk when someone else is already being helped by them. ( I mean, seriously, how rude and thoughtless can this be obviously noticed? ) get rid of them all, and add 1, Thou shall think for themself And a 1a) with the utmost need of thinking with common sense! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XenoFish Posted July 28, 2015 #12 Share Posted July 28, 2015 The one commandment to rule them all. lol 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubbly_Dooright Posted July 28, 2015 #13 Share Posted July 28, 2015 The one commandment to rule them all. lol Indeed Excellant. Party on Wayne! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
back to earth Posted July 28, 2015 #14 Share Posted July 28, 2015 get rid of them all, and add 1, Thou shall think for themself Oh, come on now ! One lousy commandment ... and you cant even get the grammar right ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
back to earth Posted July 28, 2015 #15 Share Posted July 28, 2015 I did have a 'friend' try some on ; I am the woman, your girl friend Thou shalt have no other women but me Thou shalt never take my name in vein Remember my birthday, our first mmeting, date, and having sex anniversarys and international women;s day and keep it holy devoted unto me. Honour my mother (one day she will be your mother-in-law). Thou shalt not kill, dispose of or let run away my cat Thou certainly shall not commit adultery Keep your hands out of my purse ! Do not talk about me to the neighbours or any one else. Thou shalt not covert they neighbours house, nor spend all day over there drinking beer with its male inhabitants Thou shalt not cover thy neighbours wife with your body, jewellery, fur coats .... anything ! Actually, don't even look at her ! .... or their dog either . ~ heaven will be your reward tonight\ and hell hath no fury like ...... you know ! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SHaYap Posted July 29, 2015 #16 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I'll just let the big guy do it over ... after all its his job Yeah his ... not her ... a female deity would not have made a list like that ~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ogbin Posted July 29, 2015 #17 Share Posted July 29, 2015 (edited) If you were charged with updating the 10 Commandments what would you change? Why change that which is Perfect? Edited July 29, 2015 by Ogbin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubbly_Dooright Posted July 29, 2015 #18 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I did have a 'friend' try some on ; I am the woman, your girl friend Thou shalt have no other women but me Thou shalt never take my name in vein Remember my birthday, our first mmeting, date, and having sex anniversarys and international women;s day and keep it holy devoted unto me. Honour my mother (one day she will be your mother-in-law). Thou shalt not kill, dispose of or let run away my cat Thou certainly shall not commit adultery Keep your hands out of my purse ! Do not talk about me to the neighbours or any one else. Thou shalt not covert they neighbours house, nor spend all day over there drinking beer with its male inhabitants Thou shalt not cover thy neighbours wife with your body, jewellery, fur coats .... anything ! Actually, don't even look at her ! .... or their dog either . ~ heaven will be your reward tonight\ and hell hath no fury like ...... you know ! I bet you make a great significant other. *eye wiggle* LOL I'll just let the big guy do it over ... after all its his job Yeah his ... not her ... a female deity would not have made a list like that ~ Oh, ............. and why not? (do you except the challenge?!?!?!?!?!? ) *evil laugh can be heard in the distance* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SHaYap Posted July 29, 2015 #19 Share Posted July 29, 2015 ~snip Oh, ............. and why not? (do you except the challenge?!?!?!?!?!? ) *evil laugh can be heard in the distance* Most assuredly not ... I was referring to the OP and the Biblical List ... I on the other hand has knowledge of many lists of commandments from the womenly dictates ~ but that is not the point here ... ~ *hairs stands on the back of the neck* 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubbly_Dooright Posted July 29, 2015 #20 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Most assuredly not ... And why is that, Sweetcheeks?? *more alluring eye wiggle * Am I too much for ya??KIDDING! JUST KIDDING!!!! (See what you do to me, Third Eye!!?!!!) I was referring to the OP and the Biblical List ... Weeeeellllll, isn't that still a matter of perspective? I on the other hand has knowledge of many lists of commandments from the womenly dictates ~ but that is not the point here ... Or is it? Nyuck! Nyuck! Nyuck! ................. ~ *hairs stands on the back of the neck* Good man! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SHaYap Posted July 29, 2015 #21 Share Posted July 29, 2015 And why is that, Sweetcheeks?? *more alluring eye wiggle * Am I too much for ya?? KIDDING! JUST KIDDING!!!! (See what you do to me, Third Eye!!?!!!) Weeeeellllll, isn't that still a matter of perspective? Or is it? Nyuck! Nyuck! Nyuck! ................. Good man! Oh dear ... I may need to take another shower ... Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk too ~ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenore Graves Posted July 29, 2015 #22 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Oh, come on now ! One lousy commandment ... and you cant even get the grammar right ? Well you know Im pretty lazy...and french! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubbly_Dooright Posted July 29, 2015 #23 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Well you know Im pretty lazy...and french! Oui! Oui!( I always respect the bilingual) ( Because I fail on so many levels) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenore Graves Posted July 29, 2015 #24 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Oui! Oui! ( I always respect the bilingual) ( Because I fail on so many levels) Ah yes it comes with it's advantages...and disadvantages! Like being terrible at grammar in both languages! I guess I should have mastered one language before moving on the the next 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SHaYap Posted July 29, 2015 #25 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Nonsense ... UM Forums is a safe haven for all form of grammatical and spelling atrocities ~ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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