The Vampire Lair
"All Torque & No Traction"
"Static - Cold"
Posted 28 August 2012 - 12:19 AM
Haven't been brave enough to find out.,. Self diagnosed, Depression and slightly manic at times, paranoia of which is self inflicted and can see it coming before it sets in!
The older I get the more I recognize the symptoms.
I've very recently had to put my foot down with my kids, behavior, respect and homework. Consistency and routine are key to staying some what sane!
What I can say Is that on occasion I don't like where my mind takes me when under distress, bad dreams take 1/2 a day to get over coz I analyze the crappers out of them.
The thoughts are a kettle of fish All on there own.,. My fear that some one or something could hurt my babies makes my blood boil and from that point I have to convince myself.,. "No your not a serial killer" just a mum with issues!
I used to be so nieve now I don't trust anyone or anything I know where this stems from and this it's just a survival instinct now.
I'll help a fallen human on the street but have learnt the world is cruel and now It's about Me and my own. It really does not matter what people think.
I still feel bad about not giving a homeless guy my umbrella at the markets on the weekend, he was so weathered and sitting right on the corner of a traffic intersection.
“What a treacherous thing to believe that a person is more than a person.”
Posted 28 August 2012 - 12:42 AM
I'm sure theirs something wrong with me. I think its genetic. My mother and father are both pretty mentally unstable. Same for my grandma. And pretty much everyone in my gene pool.
My father's side of the family are just normal people with anger issues. My mothers side of the family is just batshit crazy. They have the legitimate ability to change their memory so what they think happened actually happen in there head. At first I thought they just lied alot. Then I realized they were insane.
I think its narcissistic personality disorder. But due to exposure of such selfish and egocentric people over my life time I became really really self sufficient. To the point of schizotypal tendacies.
Edited by Kazoo, 28 August 2012 - 12:43 AM.
"The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all." - H.L. Mencken
i have symptoms of just about everything on that list, but not all the symptoms of any one disorder. they're all mix and match. and no, i have never been diagnosed but i did have therapy once or "counseling" as they called it. i believe it's the same thing.
Thanks for you honesty and replies *hugs* The reason I started this thread really was to ascertain who has actually been officially diagnosed with a PD as it's often something people will read about and self diagnose, which is not good for anyone. It belittles those who genuinely have a PD by making it out to be something more common than it is. Often people who have a PD won't get help because of the stigma and attitude of 'Oh I've got that it's no big deal' and 'I've cured myself get over it' from people who haven't got a clue and can't be bothered to research it. It's actually a very specialized mental disorder. That said, people with PD's do have alot of co-morbid conditions such as PTSD, depression, anxiety, addictions and phobias etc and are often not diagnosed properly because the doctor they see about these things - usually a General Practitioner, is not trained fully in that field of expertise as they are 'jack of all trades' ( I mean no disrespect!). It takes a Psychiatrist to be able to officially diagnose such a complex condition, and sadly alot of people get overlooked and don't receive the treatment they deserve. The article I enclosed on my original first post here is very good at explaining more about PD's.
I should add that I have been diagnosed with 'Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder' which is the european definition of 'Borderline Personality Disorder'. Feel free to ask me any questions about it as I'm coping really well with life now and can be open about it.
I have known people with PD and they would never admit that they had a problem, it is always everyone else. My way or the highway is sort of the way they operate. Well, from my limited experience of course.
After visiting a psychiatrist off and on for the past two years, he pegged me as having a 'self-defeating' personality disorder. Basically, I act in a way that causes problems for myself that otherwise could have been avoided. Best example would be any romantic relationship I've had, where I'd always accuse my significant other of 'not caring enough', 'liking someone else', or just being mean to them, snapping at them, ignoring them for no real reason. Which is why I'm now happily single, which in an odd way has made me a somewhat happier person, though I do miss romantic love.
If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
Posted 29 August 2012 - 12:10 AM
SPD Schizoid personality disorder, but it has served me well all my life. I never even considered there was something "wrong" with me til someone suggested I have/am SPD. I looked it up and yep that's me. I don't want help for something that "I" consider OK./normal for me..