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[Archived] YOU are BANNED! (Part 2)


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#3136    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 07:17 PM

Banned for my CV doesn’t look good no matter who writes it.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3137    ouija ouija

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:17 PM

Banned for having a CV.

Life is all too much ............................................. and not enough.

#3138    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:25 PM

Banned for it's more like VC in my case. WC to be more precise.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3139    Blue Star

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:26 PM

Banned for toilet jokes.


#3140    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:36 PM

Banned for you still haven’t heard the one about a man sitting on the toilet, pushing hard, when the electricity went out.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3141    OverSword

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:43 PM

Banned for not including the punch line.


#3142    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 08:51 PM

Banned for I was waiting for you to ask :D


So as the power went out, he starts screaming in the dark: “AAAAAAAAAA!!!”
His wife opens the bathroom door, holding a lit candle and asks: “What’t the matter with you, you idiot, why are you screaming like that?”
“Oh, good, thank god” he says “I thought I popped my eyes out.”

I'm pretty sure I told this one before... ah, what can you do, we live in age of reruns.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3143    ouija ouija

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 09:00 PM

Banned for not realising that re-runs can be just as funny second(third, fourth), time around.

Life is all too much ............................................. and not enough.

#3144    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 09:30 PM

Banned for maybe, but I’m starting to feel sorry for the poor guy getting scared like that each time I tell that joke.  
Wait, it reminded me of another one:
Two friends are shopping. Younger, newlywed says: “I’d like a nice necktie for my husband, one that will make his eyes stick out.”
Older, married for years replies: “Any necktie will make his eyes stick out, you just have to tighten it.

It should be told, not written, it's all in the tone of voice...

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3145    Blue Star

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Posted 07 January 2013 - 09:57 PM

Banned for some how....i'm not sure quite how......but your tone Misses H o A, comes across as clear as telepathy.


#3146    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 05:05 PM

Banned for that's because my fairy godmother was generous but insane.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#3147    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 05:14 PM

Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:

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#3148    Yes_Man

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 05:16 PM

View PostWordless Wanderer, on 08 January 2013 - 05:14 PM, said:

Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:
banned for not joining the dark side


#3149    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 05:19 PM

Banned for making me give up my purple lightsaber

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#3150    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 08 January 2013 - 05:44 PM

View PostWordless Wanderer, on 08 January 2013 - 05:14 PM, said:

Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:
Banned for I'd send you mine but I'm not sure if that's what you had in mind. She made me pestilence instead of giving me patience and that sort of stuff.

Banned also for lightsabers don’t kill people, screenplay writers do.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.