Plot of Seedless Valley.

[Vavelva]

Seedless valley is about a small town that once was inhabitated by christians. But occultists wanted to settle in seedless valley too. The christians did not see them as a threat, so they decided to let them stay as long as they didnt cause any trouble. Later that night, all the christians were brutally slaughtered in their sleep. The occultists claimed the town as their own, and defiled it by summoning demonic forces and a higly ranked demon lord known as Valdinuta. As the town turned from a holy place to a mass of evil, the demonic energy started spreading from seedless valley to other towns.

One year later after the massacre, 3 Christian paranormal investigators with a specific skill were sent to investigate the town. The local authorities were to scared to go there, F.B.I agents did not believe the myth, and the goverment pretended as if it did not exist. After 5 decapitated bodys mangled and on the side of the main road, the goverment sent Samson, Mark, and Cathrine to investigate it. What made them different from the other authoritys is that they were very faithfull christians and they could not be harmed easily by whatever might've been infesting the town.

After going to seedless valley and witnessing horrific demons and Warp-minded citizens, they eventually find a rare occult book known as The Crymson Eye Ritual. They eventually find out that the soul of Valdinuta was awakened, but his physical body was not. The demons infesting seedless valley were unable to harm anything unless they remain in physical form. Samson eventually finds out that he is able to channel his negative energy into a "Night Angel."

They realized that the demons in this town were not happy with a holy place being defiled, but they wanted more. The demons were slowly spreading to other towns and making chaos and havoc. The demons needed to be stopped because the demons of seedless valley were quickly speeding up the signs of the apacolypse.

The occult leader known only as "Crisis" sent Samson to hell. After defeating countless demons, he finally finds what he has been scared of his entire life. He finds himself on a platform in the middle of The Lake Of Fire. Off in the distance he sees a serpentine creature getting closer to the platform. Finally the monster rises out of the lava. It had the mark of the crymson eye, meaning that the monster was Valdinuta's physical form. The beast opened its mouth to reveal several serpents with the heads of babies. The final battle was near.

I am going to remove both chapter one and chapter two. and i shall not be posting anymore of seedless valley.

[Sthenno]

Doesn’t sound like a rip off of Silent Hill to me; it was probably just the abandoned town bit that gave people the idea. Lots of stories have that premise though, so I shouldn’t worry about that. One thing I think you do have to be wary of though, is where this story is going to be marketed. If you’re planning on pitching it to a purely Christian audience then you’ve got no worries, but if this is something you hope to get published on a National level the obvious pro-Christian, anti-occult themes might prove a bit of an obstacle for you. Just food for thought!

[Never_Hit_Nirvana]

Doesn’t sound like a rip off of Silent Hill to me; it was probably just the abandoned town bit that gave people the idea. Lots of stories have that premise though, so I shouldn’t worry about that. One thing I think you do have to be wary of though, is where this story is going to be marketed. If you’re planning on pitching it to a purely Christian audience then you’ve got no worries, but if this is something you hope to get published on a National level the obvious pro-Christian, anti-occult themes might prove a bit of an obstacle for you. Just food for thought!

How to phrase this so as not to infuriate Val...

Scrap it.

Too many holes, inconsistencies, incongruities and just plain Uwe Bollness. You'd pull your hair out trying to smooth it all out and make it believable.

No, it doesn't sound like a rip-off of 'Silent Hill', but the seed of the idea does seem to have germinated while someone was fondling themselves to the 659th viewing of the movie.

And as Sthe said, there is really no market more this kind of thing, nor will there ever be, I believe.

You've got imagination, Val. Just get off the Christian thing, stop watching 'Silent Hill' and come up with an idea that is workable and unique.

[Sthenno]

Ah, I didn’t wanna be that harsh. It’s got it’s good points, for sure. I just think it would benefit from moving away from such a strong religious theme. There’s nothing wrong with having religious motifs in a story, but not as a poorly disguised piece of propaganda supporting your own personal beliefs. Try and keep your own opinions out of it, be a bit more ambiguous and maybe you’ll broaden the story’s appeal.

[Never_Hit_Nirvana]

Ah, I didn’t wanna be that harsh. It’s got it’s good points, for sure. I just think it would benefit from moving away from such a strong religious theme. There’s nothing wrong with having religious motifs in a story, but not as a poorly disguised piece of propaganda supporting your own personal beliefs. Try and keep your own opinions out of it, be a bit more ambiguous and maybe you’ll broaden the story’s appeal.

Brutal honesty is sometimes the best medicine.

And Purplos, I think it was, and I already tried to explain the Christian thing to him on another thread.

[Sthenno]

Ah well. I just didn’t want him to get all disappointed and shred his story or anything.

[Never_Hit_Nirvana]

Ah well. I just didn’t want him to get all disappointed and shred his story or anything.

Me either, but others that matter will. Might as well start the conditioning program.

[Purplos]

And Purplos, I think it was, and I already tried to explain the Christian thing to him on another thread.

I don't remember what I said in another thread, quite frankly, but I'll believe you

Although.... having been exploring fantasy markets for the past 6 months while sending out my novel, there is a SMALL, but growing, market for Christian fantasy and horror.

Edited August 31, 2006 by Purplos

[Sthenno]

But is it all so obvious about its beginnings? I mean this is really, REALLY pro-Christian and anti 'occult'

[00000000000000000000000000]

But is it all so obvious about its beginnings? I mean this is really, REALLY pro-Christian and anti 'occult'

I agree with this and all the other comments about the involvement of Christianity in this story. I'm not an occultist or a Christian myself, but I find the idea of occultists slaughtering Christians in their sleep to be offensive. It's propaganda.

Besides, what kind of town is inhabited entirely by Christians, and why would occultists suddenly migrate en masse to be there? Just to kill? Or was there nice scenery?

[Vavelva]

1. The occultists moved into the town because they found a place they could defile. Defiling anything christian is a big occult thing. The upside down cross, the goat head, the upside down pentagram with the cursed latin scriptures in it, etc.

2. The christians found a place that they could live in without being bombarded with insults of how it causes "Violence", and they also settled in a small town to escape the anti-religous things such as people eliminating christian things from the public, and being unable to prey in school.

3. They let the occultists live with them because they were hoping they would change their ways.

This is all i can mention about Seedless Valley, this book was basicly ment for christians, i just wanted some comments on the plot and setting. But also, i am not happy with people writing bad things about christians behind my back, so i am playing them at their own game.

[Vavelva]

I also forgot to mention that I will not be posting anymore sample chapters. i have my reasons, but i have recently suggested a mod delete my current chapters because my account has something to where i cant edit my last posts.

[Ashyne]

I also forgot to mention that I will not be posting anymore sample chapters. i have my reasons, but i have recently suggested a mod delete my current chapters because my account has something to where i cant edit my last posts.

lol you did mention that at the end of your first post.

[Never_Hit_Nirvana]

1. The occultists moved into the town because they found a place they could defile. Defiling anything christian is a big occult thing. The upside down cross, the goat head, the upside down pentagram with the cursed latin scriptures in it, etc.

You need to read up on the occult, me thinks. That is a screwed up view of the subject.

Oh, wait, typical Christian view of what they don't understand.