Lilly Posted May 2, 2015 #1 Share Posted May 2, 2015 (edited) I suspect we've all heard about the ladies (usually older) who meet 'Mr Wonderful' on some dating site and then send him every dime they have. Example of this: http://www.dailymail...dn-t-exist.html How in the name of all that's reasonable/sane can anyone be so (I'm sorry to have to say it) DUMB. It boggles my mind and I can't help but wonder if these ladies aren't suffering from some type of mental illness? Edited May 2, 2015 by Lilly oops typo 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xYlvax Posted May 2, 2015 #2 Share Posted May 2, 2015 I suppose they've spent so much time dreaming of their Mr. Right that when one supposedly comes along, they do anything to make him stay around.. Like they say, "Love is blind". 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 2, 2015 Author #3 Share Posted May 2, 2015 Heck, apparently love is deaf/dumb/blind and has zero common sense. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
She-ra Posted May 2, 2015 #4 Share Posted May 2, 2015 (edited) I suspect we've all heard about the ladies (usually older) who meet 'Mr Wonderful' on some dating site and then send him every dime they have. Example of this: http://www.dailymail...dn-t-exist.html How in the name of all that's reasonable/sane can anyone be so (I'm sorry to have to say it) DUMB. It boggles my mind and I can't help but wonder if these ladies aren't suffering from some type of mental illness? While surfing through the tv one day a while back i came across a show (might have been Dr. Phil?) that had stories about ladies who have done this.It is unfortunate but how in the heck did they get talked into doing something like that? It really boggles my mind. I just don't get it. The majority of these women were 40+ and possibly even 50+ (I cannot remember exactly) but I believe they were seduced by the thought of finding a prince charming when actually they were dancing with the devil himself. This sort of thing is horrific. Edited to add: The most pitiful case was a woman who was probably in her late 60's early 70's and they guy who swindled her reminded her of her dead husband. How can people find these hot buttons and push them so hard for money? Just sick Edited May 2, 2015 by She-ra 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted May 2, 2015 #5 Share Posted May 2, 2015 It takes a lot of evil to prey on the weak and insecure. I hope there is a special place set aside for the scammers in hell. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quiXilver Posted May 2, 2015 #6 Share Posted May 2, 2015 this just makes my heart weep... predatory humans are vile. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashotep Posted May 2, 2015 #7 Share Posted May 2, 2015 They wouldn't have much luck with me because I think my money would mean more to me than someone I don't even know. I have to feel sorry for anyone so lonely they would fall for these scams though. However use your head before you open your heart or wallet. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skep B Posted May 2, 2015 #8 Share Posted May 2, 2015 I don't want to go too much into detail, but in my younger days I've done things along the same lien as this. You can figure out what people's priorities are pretty quickly and you start sharing those same values with them, let them think the things they say are original, or impactful, and before too long they begin to feel like they need you in their lives. At that point you've become their priority and you can use that to leverage whatever you want. "I'm glad to know that we're so close that you're willing to help me out with X without having to worry about it making things strained between us" X being whatever it is you wanted in the first place, money usually As for what kind of people fall for it? It's usually desperate ones, ones who've been made to feel ostracized by their family all their lives, or wives whose husbands have lost interest in them. And if they have tied their self worth and identity into that other person(s)' perception of them you can get into their heads fairly easily. I don't want it to seem like I'm bragging about this, it wasn't a great time in my life and its one of the few things I genuinely regret. But I thought it might shed some light. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 2, 2015 Author #9 Share Posted May 2, 2015 ...You can figure out what people's priorities are pretty quickly and you start sharing those same values with them, let them think the things they say are original, or impactful, and before too long they begin to feel like they need you in their lives. At that point you've become their priority and you can use that to leverage whatever you want. "I'm glad to know that we're so close that you're willing to help me out with X without having to worry about it making things strained between us" X being whatever it is you wanted in the first place, money usually... Yes, that's how it's done. However, most people over age 25 or 30 realize this. To be this naive and be 50 to 70 years old is really, really sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quiXilver Posted May 2, 2015 #10 Share Posted May 2, 2015 There is a young man, 14 in our neighborhood who is disabled. He is so desperate for some connection and some acceptance that he readily allows the kids he shags balls for at the basketball court to take his money. When his mother confronts him, trying to teach him it's wrong he says... 'I don't care about money. I like people.' He shines with love and enthusiasm. Those who pretend to be his friend, reek with vile purpose. Yet they both coexist and the young man is not bothered in the slightest. I sometimes envy his freedom. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 3, 2015 Author #11 Share Posted May 3, 2015 In reviewing this I was struck by another aspect; these women were all older and far less attractive then the personna the scammers were using. Seriously, how can these older ladies think that they are attractive to some handsome/younger/accomplished man? There has to be some kind of mental problem involved in these situations (beyond just being lonely). 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quiXilver Posted May 3, 2015 #12 Share Posted May 3, 2015 Maybe I'm wrong, but it sounds like a lot of blaming of the victims here... It's the predators who are flawed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 3, 2015 Author #13 Share Posted May 3, 2015 Maybe I'm wrong, but it sounds like a lot of blaming of the victims here... It's the predators who are flawed. The scammers are low life scumballs that deserve long prison sentences. I think this is pretty much a given. What interests me is why/how adult older women can be conned out of hundreds of thousands of dollars using just a picture and words on a page. Remember, these ladies never even meet these guys...yet they give them vast amounts of money. To me this is utterly amazing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmccr8 Posted May 3, 2015 #14 Share Posted May 3, 2015 I don't think that the problem is unique to women,yes there are con men and women,although I suspect that there is less publication of when it happens to men.I guess it is somehow different when gender distinction is involved. jmccr8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 3, 2015 Author #15 Share Posted May 3, 2015 ...I guess it is somehow different when gender distinction is involved. Not really (IMO anyway). If some older homely man was scammed out of big bucks by someone claiming to be younger and gorgeous I'd still wonder what the heck was wrong with him to be so naive. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skep B Posted May 3, 2015 #16 Share Posted May 3, 2015 The scammers are low life scumballs that deserve long prison sentences. I think this is pretty much a given. What interests me is why/how adult older women can be conned out of hundreds of thousands of dollars using just a picture and words on a page. Remember, these ladies never even meet these guys...yet they give them vast amounts of money. To me this is utterly amazing. It's just desperation. Sometimes it IS someone with a disability, other times its someone who is socially secluded. This person makes them feel a way other people haven't. You're obviously pretty stable in who you are, for example so you're less likely to be a target, for example. But, the old lady who lives alone who's husband died years ago and who's not had any romantic attention since then or even before then, shes more likely a target. As for men, it really doesn't matter age. Mean think with their.....um......egos. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quiXilver Posted May 3, 2015 #17 Share Posted May 3, 2015 The scammers are low life scumballs that deserve long prison sentences. I think this is pretty much a given. What interests me is why/how adult older women can be conned out of hundreds of thousands of dollars using just a picture and words on a page. Remember, these ladies never even meet these guys...yet they give them vast amounts of money. To me this is utterly amazing. I get your context and agree. That part is fascinating. How we can so easily deceive ourselves. I go back and forth, sometimes I can't help but think they are aware on some level, but like the boy in my reference value some kind of contact over money in the bank. Then I recall my own self deceptions and how readily I lived them fully, completely unaware that they were only true, to me. In the end, the whole thing just makes me sad. I see something similar in some of the meditation/cultivation retreats I have participated in, where people who are desperately seeking healing and release of old painful experiences, who lash out as soon as they begin to really lose some of those pains. It's been their identity for so long that they just lash out desperately at their teachers and grab onto that pain, unwilling and fearful of releasing their story, because what would they be without it? That level of self deception is similar to me and so harsh, because there is a level of awareness that one is returning to the very thing they wanted and started to release. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_dreamer Posted May 3, 2015 #18 Share Posted May 3, 2015 I've heard that a high percentage of online dating ads are fake - either cheaters or scammers. Buyer beware. Plenty of men have also been scammed by online dating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 3, 2015 Author #19 Share Posted May 3, 2015 Yeah, when it comes to online dating lying actually seems to be the norm. So even if you don't get a catfish/scammer, you are likely to get someone who's married or just totally lying about themselves. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSouls7 Posted May 9, 2015 #20 Share Posted May 9, 2015 (edited) Wow this is horrible!! but i also see young women doing a similar scam. They claim they need 90 dollars for their cell phone bill! Like i really give a damm about them or their bill. Well dumb guys actually pay up... thinking she is going to "love" them. Hate to say but love does not exist on the net. Only hate evil and darkness lives here thank you come again! And would you like a squishy with that ? Edited May 9, 2015 by LostSouls7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSouls7 Posted May 9, 2015 #21 Share Posted May 9, 2015 Yeah, when it comes to online dating lying actually seems to be the norm. So even if you don't get a catfish/scammer, you are likely to get someone who's married or just totally lying about themselves. I once met a woman who was a vampire. She tried to eat me.. never again .. no more online dating.. thank you 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 10, 2015 Author #22 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Uh...I wouldn't go so far as to say the internet is only hate, evil, darkness. The 'problem' is that there's little to no social control on the internet. People feel 'free' to do all sorts of things in virtual reality that they'd never do in actual reality. Add to the people who are trying to live in fantasy land the people who are criminals...not the best place to find others to date IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
She-ra Posted May 10, 2015 #23 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Yeah, when it comes to online dating lying actually seems to be the norm. So even if you don't get a catfish/scammer, you are likely to get someone who's married or just totally lying about themselves. When it come to anything online nowadays LYING seems to be the norm; you just cannot trust anyone anymore. There are some pretty HEARTLESS and mentally unstable people out there who have nothing better to do than make up outrageous stories and prey on people's kindness and trust. They are an evil breed of scum whose typing fingers should be maimed so they can never repeat their sick and twisted ways again. They take advantage of genuine, kind and caring people who try to help and make life a better place for them. They cry victim and pull on people's heartstrings when they are nothing more than fantastical, lying, low-life scum, story tellers creating a web of lies to lure others in and then attack and maul their next prey. They are nothing more than a parasite on this planet, wasting perfectly good air and resources. These scammer's and liar's should be locked up in a very special place in hell to forever burn in writhing pain for eternity. I rarely use the word *hate* but in this instance I can say with utmost certainty that I *HATE* people who LIE and prey on other people's emotions for their own cheap, sick thrills. It is nothing more than immature, insecure, manipulative and self-serving behavior. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilly Posted May 10, 2015 Author #24 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Preying on emotion ain't the half of it...some are conning vast amounts of money out of those naive/foolish enough to be manipulated. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tcgram Posted May 10, 2015 #25 Share Posted May 10, 2015 I too, don't understand what would cause women to allow themselves to be manipulated in such a way. Maybe it's a combination of low self-esteem/loneliness that makes them want to hold on to someone who makes them feel that they are special and loved. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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