earthygirl04 Posted October 7, 2004 #1 Share Posted October 7, 2004 Graveyard Humor Be careful what you inscribe on a tombstone. Here are some funny ones! Anna Wallace The children of Israel wanted bread And the Lord sent them manna, Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sir John Strange Here lies an honest lawyer, And that is Strange. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sacred to the memory of my husband John Barnes who died January 3, 1803 His comely young widow, aged 23, has many qualifications of a good wife, and yearns to be comforted. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ann Mann Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Russell J. Larsen buried in Logan, Ut. Two things I love most, good horses and beautiful women, And when I die I hope they tan this old hide of mine and make it into a ladies riding saddle, So I can rest in peace between the two things I love -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In Memory of Beza Wood Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837 Aged 45 yrs. Here lies one Wood Enclosed in wood One Wood Within another. The outer wood Is very good: We cannot praise The other. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- When the great judgement day arrives and Joshua Fenton Newton does not emerge from this hole, you will know that someone made a mistake and buried me in the wrong hole. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From La Pointe, Wis. To the Memory of Abraham Beaulieu Born 15 September 1822 Accidentally shot 4th April 1844 As a mark of affection from his brother. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From Burlington Vt. She lived with her husband fifty years And died in the confident hope of a better life. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Here lies my wife: Here let her lie! Now she's at rest And so am I. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Here Lies Mary Smith Silent At Last Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yobemag Posted October 7, 2004 #2 Share Posted October 7, 2004 those are some good ones Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenk Posted October 7, 2004 #3 Share Posted October 7, 2004 Those are good! I just hope my family doesen't use one of those on me . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tia Posted October 7, 2004 #4 Share Posted October 7, 2004 Love them especially, Russell J. Larsen buried in Logan, Ut. Two things I love most, good horses and beautiful women, And when I die I hope they tan this old hide of mine and make it into a ladies riding saddle, So I can rest in peace between the two things I love Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janiel Posted October 7, 2004 #5 Share Posted October 7, 2004 Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go. Ann Mann Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767 Here lies my wife: Here let her lie! Now she's at rest And so am I. Here Lies Mary Smith Silent At Last 294669[/snapback] those are the best Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 7, 2004 Author #6 Share Posted October 7, 2004 These two are my favorites! Russell J. Larsen buried in Logan, Ut. Two things I love most, good horses and beautiful women, And when I die I hope they tan this old hide of mine and make it into a ladies riding saddle, So I can rest in peace between the two things I love ________________________________________________ Here lies my wife: Here let her lie! Now she's at rest And so am I. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diebytheflyguy Posted October 7, 2004 #7 Share Posted October 7, 2004 (edited) Playing with names in a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery: Here lies Johnny Yeast Pardon me For not rising. Memory of an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania cemetery: Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake Stepped on the gas Instead of the brake. In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery: Here lays Butch, We planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger, But slow on the draw. Lester Moore was a Wells, Fargo Co. station agent for Naco, Arizona in the cowboy days of the 1880's. He's buried in the Boot Hill Cemetery in Tombstone, Arizona: Here lies Lester Moore Four slugs from a .44 No Les No More. In a Georgia cemetery: "I told you I was sick!" On Margaret Daniels grave at Hollywood Cemetery Richmond, Virginia: She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her. In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England: On the 22nd of June - Jonathan Fiddle - Went out of tune. Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont has an epitaph that sounds like something from a Three Stooges movie: Here lies the body of our Anna Done to death by a banana It wasn't the fruit that laid her low But the skin of the thing that made her go. The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer tip: Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R.E. Danforth's Non-Explosive Burning Fluid" Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903--Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. ....[attachmentid=6087] ....[attachmentid=6088] ....[attachmentid=6089] ..... Edited October 7, 2004 by Diebytheflyguy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 14, 2004 Author #8 Share Posted October 14, 2004 (edited) Those were great!!! Thanks for adding them Diebytheflyguy!! Edited October 14, 2004 by earthygirl04 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BurnSide Posted October 14, 2004 #9 Share Posted October 14, 2004 ahahha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kryso Posted October 14, 2004 #10 Share Posted October 14, 2004 Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go. I like this one, lol Going to be a bit like me when my time comes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Great Big Sea Posted October 14, 2004 #11 Share Posted October 14, 2004 Funny! If those are real then they sure had good sense of humors! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 14, 2004 Author #12 Share Posted October 14, 2004 (edited) In a Georgia cemetery: "I told you I was sick!" That's a cute one! The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer tip: Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R.E. Danforth's Non-Explosive Burning Fluid" Edited October 14, 2004 by earthygirl04 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancing_Dumplings Posted October 14, 2004 #13 Share Posted October 14, 2004 funny and yet depressing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janiel Posted October 14, 2004 #14 Share Posted October 14, 2004 thats the best one ever DD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancing_Dumplings Posted October 14, 2004 #15 Share Posted October 14, 2004 i feel soooooo bad for that little kid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janiel Posted October 14, 2004 #16 Share Posted October 14, 2004 i laugh at that kid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 15, 2004 Author #17 Share Posted October 15, 2004 OMG!!! Nooooo!! Not Santa!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janiel Posted October 15, 2004 #18 Share Posted October 15, 2004 yea, i killed santa......... heres the story http://www.unexplained-mysteries.com/forum...ndpost&p=302948 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 15, 2004 Author #19 Share Posted October 15, 2004 (edited) took an axe and started chopping screaming " HO HO HO !!" while hacking and hopping Santa took 10 blows before dropping then Janiel departed without even mopping OMG!!! I'm gonna have nightmares for months now!! I can't believe it...... I love Christmas time! Now I'll never get that lifesize poster of The Rock...... Edited October 15, 2004 by earthygirl04 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancing_Dumplings Posted October 15, 2004 #20 Share Posted October 15, 2004 (edited) lol no worries! there is always another santa you should download the song "the night santa went crazy" by Weird Al oh thats such a happy holiday song Edited October 15, 2004 by Dancing_Dumplings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cor_raven Posted October 15, 2004 #21 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Tomb stones of the simpsons cast Groundskeeper willie He died with his boots on but we still can't find his underwear Apu Nahasapeemapetelon Thank you i will come again Krusty T. clown a little song a litle dance the irs now owns my pants. Patty and Selma Bouvie we will love you forever now that your dead Police Chief Clancy Wigum We all knew he would be shot by one of his own men just not all of them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 15, 2004 Author #22 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Somehow I don't believe you DD about Weird Al's song being a happy holiday song......... but I could be wrong.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earthygirl04 Posted October 15, 2004 Author #23 Share Posted October 15, 2004 cor_raven Today, 07:31 PM Post #21 Tomb stones of the simpsons cast Groundskeeper willie He died with his boots on but we still can't find his underwear "lol" I like that one! Police Chief Clancy Wigum We all knew he would be shot by one of his own men just not all of them "lol" That's funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cor_raven Posted October 15, 2004 #24 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Mayor Quimby Born: may 3, 1945 Faked own deathj and ran to mexico with floozy june 8, 2004 Abraham simpson let me geuss my no good son was to cheep to put all the words on My- Edna krabapel if children are our future thank god i'm dead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dancing_Dumplings Posted October 15, 2004 #25 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Somehow I don't believe you DD about Weird Al's song being a happy holiday song......... but I could be wrong.... 307745[/snapback] lol its not a happy holiday song acutally its pretty gruesome, depending on which version you get Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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