29 replies to this topic

[G Donnelly]

R4z3rsPar4d0x, on 18 January 2013 - 02:00 AM, said:

The thing is im not depressed Iv been depressed before and know how depression feels, I guess what Im trying to say is I feel indifferent.  I dont really know how better to describe it. Other then indifferent.  Sorry thats the only way I know how to describe it

I'm not going to be jumping to conclusions just yet...
But I can totally relate to the indifference and giving him to my baser emotions.
And you mentioned a lot of trauma to do with your childhood which could even describe me.
I suffer from bouts of depression but that's mostly an on-off kind of thing.
However because you've got a girlfriend is kinda making me hesitate to state you have Aspergers.
But if you answer this next set of questions in the affirmative I'll welcome you to the Aspergers community with open arms...

Do you tend to try and avoid people and offer nothing more than "please" and " thank-you" in front of strangers?
Do you have a problem with eye contact even with people you know and love?
Do you have a particular obsession which drives people insane when your giving them not enough attention because you are so consumed in it?
Are you consumed by certain set routines and get upset if somebody's disrupted  your system?

There's other indicators but these four are by far the strongest so far.
For all you know it could be some other psychological condition.
It's worth pointing out that Aspies can have girlfriends and get married but it's usually with their own kind.
This could be an other reason why I'm not passing judgment on you till I've got the facts together.

Edited by Medium Brown, 18 January 2013 - 12:36 PM.

[R4z3rsPar4d0x]

Jinxdom, on 18 January 2013 - 05:07 AM, said:

Been there done that. Had it for about 5 years. Examine your life and find out what you want to do(Something positive), then do it. Mine was because of my ex. I left with nothing but a backpack full of clothes and a bus ticket but I started to actually give a crap again. It might be different for you so examine all of your life. Change the parts that you feel indifferent about(In the best way possible, IE if you feel indifferent about your job find another one first before you quit,).
Following the same grind day in and day out is a huge factor in feeling indifferent. (Find help before you go all out Tyler Durden)


Now traumatic childhoods also could do something odd to your emotions. Think of physical pain and getting used to it. Like jumping in a hot shower. At first it's hot, then after a while it feels warm, to make it feel hot again you need to turn the heat up even higher. Same thing happens to emotions when you go through traumatic events(For some people). Basically building up a tolerance to emotions. Not everybody shuts down through traumatic events.

I think thats whats basically happened hit you hit it the nail on the head with the emotion thing

Blue Star, on 18 January 2013 - 03:27 AM, said:

Thank you for further explanation, R4z3rsPard0x.

......i didn't think you wanted pity.

You know, that childhood events can have some quite powerful results, right?
Such as, disassociation. The blocking oneself off from experiencing the whole gamut of emotions because as a child, feelings and or experiences can be, traumatic, completely overwhelming..... To the point of closing down all but the most base sensations.
This is a survival tactic used to get us through the actual event but then if the event is not then dealt with properly, we will stay suspended as it were at that point. This is not a thing to be discounted as the reality of what happened or happened around the trauma can be just way too much to comprehend as a child.
We put it away in a box marked for later review.
May i suggest, you speak with someone who has understanding of working with trauma cases. There are other things that will also help......Such as EFT, NLP, Rolfing... To name but a few...But after saying this, talking and the right kind of counselling is probably the best place to start. There is much to help but it is a process and can not be rushed no matter how frustrating or tough it is. It's not easy to open the can of worms and what may be unlocked can feel overwhelming too, you may regret going back to a fully feeling human being. It is not for the weak hearted.
I have felt this, can you tell....yet with the right help you will feel again. I promise. Though it's only for the most brave...Hope this helps

your right I did have to build up a shell around myself to deal with the pain and its like I reposted Im not emotionless, I feel but its to a lesser extent than a lot of other people Im actually not unhappy at all and to tell you the truth Im not sure I want to go back to feeling fully human. I mean its like you said I may regret it. I see how others have such feelings about things and to tell you the truth it doesnt seem like its all that fun.

Medium Brown, on 18 January 2013 - 12:29 PM, said:

I'm not going to be jumping to conclusions just yet...
But I can totally relate to the indifference and giving him to my baser emotions.
And you mentioned a lot of trauma to do with your childhood which could even describe me.
I suffer from bouts of depression but that's mostly an on-off kind of thing.
However because you've got a girlfriend is kinda making me hesitate to state you have Aspergers.
But if you answer this next set of questions in the affirmative I'll welcome you to the Aspergers community with open arms...

Do you tend to try and avoid people and offer nothing more than "please" and " thank-you" in front of strangers?
Do you have a problem with eye contact even with people you know and love?
Do you have a particular obsession which drives people insane when your giving them not enough attention because you are so consumed in it?
Are you consumed by certain set routines and get upset if somebody's disrupted  your system?

There's other indicators but these four are by far the strongest so far.
For all you know it could be some other psychological condition.
It's worth pointing out that Aspies can have girlfriends and get married but it's usually with their own kind.
This could be an other reason why I'm not passing judgment on you till I've got the facts together.

No
I have no problem with making eye contact with people I know and love
No
No

I know what aspergers looks like and I dont behave in that way at all.

Edited by R4z3rsPar4d0x, 18 January 2013 - 06:09 PM.

[Professor T]

R4z3rsPar4d0x, on 17 January 2013 - 09:12 PM, said:

For the past couple of years of my life Iv just felt empty inside, like someone scooped out all of my feelings except the baser ones and just left me with this feeling of emptiness.  Iv been put on anti - depressants and they just made me feel sick.  My question though has anybody else felt just empty like me for this long of a period?

I don't think this is depression, but then again I'm no Psycologist so for God's sake don't take mine or anyone elses advice unless something rings true..

I think you have no purpose, or no direction or meaning in life..

The Emptiness is a yearning for something different & new, a reason for being here, something to give your life meaning..

So, just think about it. What is your purpose? And by purpose I mean something bigger than your-self. Purpose isn't to make money, to have children, to be popular. Purpose is something deep, like "Inspire people" or "Feed the hungry" or "make people laugh".. Purpose gives energy and direction in life and lives in our core.. Without purpose, life would seem empty..

Edited to Add: purpose isn't a goal. It has no finish line..

Edited by Professor T, 18 January 2013 - 07:15 PM.

[Hilander]

If you aren't getting enough sleep that can really effect you and cause depression.

[R4z3rsPar4d0x]

Professor T, on 18 January 2013 - 07:11 PM, said:

I don't think this is depression, but then again I'm no Psycologist so for God's sake don't take mine or anyone elses advice unless something rings true..

I think you have no purpose, or no direction or meaning in life..

The Emptiness is a yearning for something different & new, a reason for being here, something to give your life meaning..

So, just think about it. What is your purpose? And by purpose I mean something bigger than your-self. Purpose isn't to make money, to have children, to be popular. Purpose is something deep, like "Inspire people" or "Feed the hungry" or "make people laugh".. Purpose gives energy and direction in life and lives in our core.. Without purpose, life would seem empty..

Edited to Add: purpose isn't a goal. It has no finish line..

The thing is its like I said earlier Im generally happy, I enjoy my job and my relationship with my Girlfriend.  

Hilander, on 18 January 2013 - 08:26 PM, said:

If you aren't getting enough sleep that can really effect you and cause depression.

Sleeps been elusive to me ever since senior year of highschool. I developed insomnia around then and I have long periods of time where sleep just wont come. This isnt saying that I dont sleep period, but yeah Im aware that not sleeping can cause problems.  When I do sleep I have pretty intense nightmares, but I wont go into that.
By the way thanks for all the comments guys

[Raven_Tear]

You don't need meds, they do more harm than good, and as far as shrinks, they get paid to listen to your problems and give their advice based on textbooks. Another waste of time. Just reach inside yourself, roll the dice and see what you come up with. Being empty isn't always a bad thing, it can be a defense mechanism. It won't last, you'll get past it with determination. I've been through it myself enough.

[regi]

R...Par..., what you've described sounds to me like nothing more than a rut...that you're simply not getting much out of what you've been doing "for the past couple of years".

[G Donnelly]

R4z3rsPar4d0x, on 18 January 2013 - 06:04 PM, said:

No
I have no problem with making eye contact with people I know and love
No
No

I know what aspergers looks like and I dont behave in that way at all.

That was crude and insensitive of me.

From now on I'm staying out of other posters emotional problems.

[regi]

Medium Brown, on 20 January 2013 - 02:41 PM, said:

That was crude and insensitive of me.

No way...to the contrary! The poster wanted to hear from those who've felt "empty inside" and you offered insight based on your own personal experience, and based on what little info there was to go on.
I saw this thread yesterday and was hesitant to comment because it was just too vague. Your response offered more to go on, and apart from that, it's interesting information which potentially could be very helpful to anyone reading it!

Edited by regi, 20 January 2013 - 03:19 PM.

[emberdawn]

Perhaps a change of your avatar would help. Something happier, brighter with things in it that represent what you want in your life. A positive way to remember what you wish to achieve.  It's a place to start.

[R4z3rsPar4d0x]

emberdawn, on 20 January 2013 - 03:41 PM, said:

Perhaps a change of your avatar would help. Something happier, brighter with things in it that represent what you want in your life. A positive way to remember what you wish to achieve.  It's a place to start.

lol I like my avatar The Great Chthulu

Edited by R4z3rsPar4d0x, 20 January 2013 - 05:15 PM.

[G Donnelly]

regi, on 20 January 2013 - 03:15 PM, said:

No way...to the contrary! The poster wanted to hear from those who've felt "empty inside" and you offered insight based on your own personal experience, and based on what little info there was to go on.
I saw this thread yesterday and was hesitant to comment because it was just too vague. Your response offered more to go on, and apart from that, it's interesting information which potentially could be very helpful to anyone reading it!

Though it dosn't alter the facts that he rejected the advice for not being relevant.
Tbh I wasn't focusing on the " empty inside" bit but the lack of emotion.
It just felt like classic Aspergers which is why I asked all the questions.
I wouldn't say crude and insensitive as such but just plain unfamiliarity.
At the time when I posted it I thought I was poking into his life too much.
It just felt a bit extreme which is why I just jumped in to apologise.
From now on I'm not going to be the guy who cried wolf.
For all you know a proper Aspie could stumble upon the boards but alas this thread will be lost in the mists of time.
I would love to have a face to face with him or her.

[Leave Britney alone!]

Jinxdom, on 18 January 2013 - 09:51 AM, said:

Sometimes depression simply means you need to change your life, same with apathy. (apathy isn't always a symptom of depression or other mental illness). Hell it could even simply be from a sleep disorder. I'd make a sleep journal honestly because doctors here insomnia and don't do jack but you document your sleeping patterns you might just provide something useful to the doctor. Sometimes sleep disorders are the cause of depression and apathy instead of being a symptom of either.
Apathy alone isn't a mental illness(Seriously there is a large selection of problems that cause apathy ), hence why I was blunt. (Not to mention that I been through it and still carry a bit of apathy with me).


Getting information from outside sources then talking them over with your doctor is a good idea.(Only the good ideas because my god there are a lot of bad ones out there) Believe it or not doctors are human, humans aren't infallible, which means doctors aren't infallible. (Heck I'm very far from infallible so consult with your doctor)

Except this thread started with the OP stating they were put on antidepressants but they made them feel sick. This is already a medical issue but one where it sounds the patient did not followup with their physician or clinic to get it right.

So of course they might accept your advice because it would mean they can stop trying with doctors but I don't think it will help to begin taking advice from the internet now.

[Jinxdom]

The top part isn't advice, it is other things that cause apathy. He can take them to his doctor to discuss.

How can you have a discussion with your doctor if you have no previous knowledge of the subject. This topic was to learn a little knowledge. I just told him some things that lead to apathy. So now instead of saying hey the meds don't work to the doctor, he could say hey the meds don't work maybe I have a sleep disorder, instead of going from pill to pill until they find one that hopefully works.

The anti-depressants were giving by a doctor so there was no point for me to even mention them(besides the paragraph above) because that is something to discuss with his doctor.

Now the only advice in that quote was the last paragraph, which if followed means only one thing. Talking with your damn doctor.
Not just listen but consult, talk, discuss.

[emberdawn]

R4z3rsPar4d0x, on 20 January 2013 - 05:14 PM, said:

lol I like my avatar The Great Chthulu

Thank you for not being upset.