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God responded to my calling out for him


Luxord

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Ok, so I decided to meditate today instead of doing my homework earlier and I had a scary experience with one very positive aspect to it. So that you know, this meditation is a wakeful sleep. What I mean by that is that this dream was vivid and interactive while being conscious. That is the type of meditation I did. Going into it, I focused on not focusing and just letting go, and being like air. As the meditative dream started it was already deep and very consciously interactive. I could move, talk, think, plan, feel, and have conversations without waking up. The feeling of being in this state of being or trance like state is one of feeling and existing deep in your subconscious. It is different than regular vivid dreams that are ethereal and lofty. No, this was like taking a drug and sleeping awake. Besides all of these details the meditative dream started off really bad. Almost immediately I encountered the beings and events of my second psychotic episode; namely, demons, the devil, and other demonic entities and energies. As I got deeper and deeper the dream got worse and worse. At one point I had my eyes open, not literally, but in a dream state. Basically, your seeing the world as if your eyes are open but in reality, their not. The perspective was one of me just lying in my bed as I was, but what shocked me a little bit was a visible hand caressing my cheek. The hand felt cold, VERY real and negative. It was so real, I asked my dad if he did that to mess with me and he said no seriously. I would even go as far to say the hand felt more real than real life because of it's unique qualities. The hand was a normal human hand but I immediately sensed and believed that it was evil and was the demon or devil causing all the crazy stuff around me and is the being that has been haunting me. I don't remember this one detail clearly, but the entity said something in a mocking and cooing voice with a whisper like quality to it. From there, I decided to ignore it because I REALLY wanted to continue this meditative dream. I wanted to get as deep as possible. By the next few layers of the dream (and by that I mean the dream having significant boundary lines separating levels of deepness to them) I felt like I was practically in real life. It was scary **** since the dream had taken a turn for the worst : (. however, out of ALL OF THIS, I had an amazing confirmation. At the end of the dream I was walking on the sidewalk around my apartment complex. At that moment I felt kind of panicked and had a despair kind of feeling. I felt that way because I have made a lot of progress emotionally but still haven't solved my psychotic episode problem that surrounds me everyday. I believe it will prevent me from moving forward in life and making progress. I felt stuck and trapped. I felt abused so some extent by paranormal entities. I try REALLY hard to get out of this mess and nothing works. NOTHING. It's all futile efforts. I feel like Gohan against final form Freeza if you know what I am talking about. Anyways, as soon as I realized I was in a losing battle full of struggle and despair I literally called out to god out loud. Remember, I can talk and hear things clearly in this meditative state. As soon as I said it, I felt this pouring of the same or almost exactly the same feeling of when I listen to music and feel deep and connected feelings to my soul, heart, and life. This feeling is extremely pleasurable and unlike most feelings of pleasure, it feels complete and whole. Not saying you don't want more, but it doesn't leave you with an emptiness. It is fully satisfying. Every second of it. No, every millisecond. I am grateful I am even able to feel that. The way I called out to god was in a normal voice but with pure sincerity and a lot of emotion. After that feeling, I realized god does hear me, know me, and might actually love or care about me. I am starting to believe that god loves me because of other events, but in relation to this one, it is because that feeling also felt full of a kind of water like love and compassion. I was a cup and god was pouring himself into me. So that is my story.

As I consciously decided to wake up I said " I am ready to wake up now" out loud in my meditative dream. It was really hard to wake up and in the process I almost went under ANOTHER level of deepness that felt like it would be nearly impossible to wake up from. I might have decided to explore that deeper layer, but I needed to wake up to workout before I ran out of time to work on my homework so I didn't. As I made a physical effort within my meditative dream to wake up I saw a baby panda in one of the layers on my room's floor. I felt like it was meant to scare me like a jump scare. I took advantage of that and picked it up and looked at it to scare me awake. Then, I awoke. Refreshed and had a pretty good workout. What do you guys think? I am getting tired of this demon and psychotic stuff. I believe it is real. Some things I believe is that people are laughing at me, that their fake coughing is directed towards me to scare or unsettle me, and finally that the devil is real and is trying to **** with me and get me.

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Would you kindly break this down so that it's easier to read. I've mild dyslexia and it's giving me a headache. Thanks in advance.

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I really enjoyed your story, because I know exactly the wave come over you like you shortly described. The same thing had happened to me out of nowhere, back in the short time I was really giving my all to meditating. It is the most beautiful feeling, and I couldn't help but say "I love you" to something I didn't even understand. It just came out and was right. Then I 'heard' (as in, I wasn't consciously directing these words to speak in my head; they just did, but in my usual thinking inner voice) "did you forget your name"? I've gotta be honest, it made me cry.

The day before I had passingly remembered after a long time the meaning of my name, 'gift from God'.

I wasn't and still am not religious after that experience, but I now have felt that there is something in that vein that is real and is likely what so many people have translated into 'God'. I think it is all around and in us, but I really can't even begin to understand what it is, but love is a huge part. Maybe it is Love. Or maybe that's just another name used to describe something we can't understand or explain.

I've been through the same thoughts you have, and they're crippling. There's likely nothing I can really say to you that would help, but I can only plant the true seed that people aren't trying to mess with you. You're messing with yourself. It sounds harsh when you feel so strongly that there are people messing with you, but if you really understand and take to heart that you are the one messing with yourself, you can start to heal yourself. Once you can have a breakthrough in the way you think and see things, it gets easier, so it's not impossible.

Immersing your state in positivity is essential, I believe. I was just thinking this earlier tonight. This video can really help you out if you can make the decision in your mind and stick with it. It can be used for anything you set your mind to. It's about training your mind to think a certain way, which is the way that will quite effectively, almost magically, bring you what you want and need:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaHDCcUcmc0

Edited by _Only
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I really enjoyed your story, because I know exactly the wave come over you like you shortly described. The same thing had happened to me out of nowhere, back in the short time I was really giving my all to meditating. It is the most beautiful feeling, and I couldn't help but say "I love you" to something I didn't even understand. It just came out and was right. Then I 'heard' (as in, I wasn't consciously directing these words to speak in my head; they just did, but in my usual thinking inner voice) "did you forget your name"? I've gotta be honest, it made me cry.

The day before I had passingly remembered after a long time the meaning of my name, 'gift from God'.

I wasn't and still am not religious after that experience, but I now have felt that there is something in that vein that is real and is likely what so many people have translated into 'God'. I think it is all around and in us, but I really can't even begin to understand what it is, but love is a huge part. Maybe it is Love. Or maybe that's just another name used to describe something we can't understand or explain.

I've been through the same thoughts you have, and they're crippling. There's likely nothing I can really say to you that would help, but I can only plant the true seed that people aren't trying to mess with you. You're messing with yourself. It sounds harsh when you feel so strongly that there are people messing with you, but if you really understand and take to heart that you are the one messing with yourself, you can start to heal yourself. Once you can have a breakthrough in the way you think and see things, it gets easier, so it's not impossible.

Immersing your state in positivity is essential, I believe. I was just thinking this earlier tonight. This video can really help you out if you can make the decision in your mind and stick with it. It can be used for anything you set your mind to. It's about training your mind to think a certain way, which is the way that will quite effectively, almost magically, bring you what you want and need:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaHDCcUcmc0

Thanks. I am scared not believing in god and vice versa. I am scared of my ability to physically change my reality. I am scared of the truth in some sense. However, the truth is one of the only things that will set me free from my turmoil. This includes the aspect of me that is my ego.
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Would you kindly break this down so that it's easier to read. I've mild dyslexia and it's giving me a headache. Thanks in advance.

Basically, I had a negative meditative dream that was fully interactive and felt very deep. At the end though, I called out to god in fear and desperation and I felt awater like feeling of pleasure, and I think love being poured into me. I also had a hard time waking up. It took a lot of physical effort and focus to.
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_Only, that is a very very good post and I feel you are spot on with all you said. :tu:

Too many times, people ( myself included) get caught up in all the negative things going on that if we don't watch it, the negativity changes our mindset to the point of literally only seeing the bad in the world and not remembering that this world is polarized, thus there are positive things as well. Its about perspective.

If one can find it within to change their inner perspective towards being positive ( planting the seed _Only spoke of), their outward perspective will begin to see a completely different landscape.

I meditate as well and IMHO, for me, there is no such thing as a bad meditative experience regardless if its demons or unicorns. Facing our " inner demons" so to speak is part of the learning experience that is life and facing them helps us grow and resolve issues so that they may trouble us no more. Now, there is more space is the garden of the mind to plant the seeds _Only spoke of.

There truly is nothing to fear.

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_Only, that is a very very good post and I feel you are spot on with all you said. :tu:

Too many times, people ( myself included) get caught up in all the negative things going on that if we don't watch it, the negativity changes our mindset to the point of literally only seeing the bad in the world and not remembering that this world is polarized, thus there are positive things as well. Its about perspective.

If one can find it within to change their inner perspective towards being positive ( planting the seed _Only spoke of), their outward perspective will begin to see a completely different landscape.

I meditate as well and IMHO, for me, there is no such thing as a bad meditative experience regardless if its demons or unicorns. Facing our " inner demons" so to speak is part of the learning experience that is life and facing them helps us grow and resolve issues so that they may trouble us no more. Now, there is more space is the garden of the mind to plant the seeds _Only spoke of.

There truly is nothing to fear.

Is IMHO "in my home only" ?
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Basically, I had a negative meditative dream that was fully interactive and felt very deep. At the end though, I called out to god in fear and desperation and I felt awater like feeling of pleasure, and I think love being poured into me. I also had a hard time waking up. It took a lot of physical effort and focus to.

Thanks, I have a hard time with those big blocks too.

That has happen to me. It is the zone, it is a part of meditation. The zone is when you get it right. It can be scary the first time it happens. Call it the Universe, call it God, call it the Awen, Buddha nature, whatever you like it is all the same. It is the moment your mind connects with the flow of the Universe. You will not go into it and never wake up, you might fall asleep, but you will wake up.

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Ok, so I decided to meditate today instead of doing my homework earlier and I had a scary experience with one very positive aspect to it. So that you know, this meditation is a wakeful sleep. What I mean by that is that this dream was vivid and interactive while being conscious. That is the type of meditation I did. Going into it, I focused on not focusing and just letting go, and being like air. As the meditative dream started it was already deep and very consciously interactive. I could move, talk, think, plan, feel, and have conversations without waking up. The feeling of being in this state of being or trance like state is one of feeling and existing deep in your subconscious. It is different than regular vivid dreams that are ethereal and lofty. No, this was like taking a drug and sleeping awake. Besides all of these details the meditative dream started off really bad. Almost immediately I encountered the beings and events of my second psychotic episode; namely, demons, the devil, and other demonic entities and energies. As I got deeper and deeper the dream got worse and worse. At one point I had my eyes open, not literally, but in a dream state. Basically, your seeing the world as if your eyes are open but in reality, their not. The perspective was one of me just lying in my bed as I was, but what shocked me a little bit was a visible hand caressing my cheek. The hand felt cold, VERY real and negative. It was so real, I asked my dad if he did that to mess with me and he said no seriously. I would even go as far to say the hand felt more real than real life because of it's unique qualities. The hand was a normal human hand but I immediately sensed and believed that it was evil and was the demon or devil causing all the crazy stuff around me and is the being that has been haunting me. I don't remember this one detail clearly, but the entity said something in a mocking and cooing voice with a whisper like quality to it. From there, I decided to ignore it because I REALLY wanted to continue this meditative dream. I wanted to get as deep as possible. By the next few layers of the dream (and by that I mean the dream having significant boundary lines separating levels of deepness to them) I felt like I was practically in real life. It was scary **** since the dream had taken a turn for the worst : (. however, out of ALL OF THIS, I had an amazing confirmation. At the end of the dream I was walking on the sidewalk around my apartment complex. At that moment I felt kind of panicked and had a despair kind of feeling. I felt that way because I have made a lot of progress emotionally but still haven't solved my psychotic episode problem that surrounds me everyday. I believe it will prevent me from moving forward in life and making progress. I felt stuck and trapped. I felt abused so some extent by paranormal entities. I try REALLY hard to get out of this mess and nothing works. NOTHING. It's all futile efforts. I feel like Gohan against final form Freeza if you know what I am talking about. Anyways, as soon as I realized I was in a losing battle full of struggle and despair I literally called out to god out loud. Remember, I can talk and hear things clearly in this meditative state. As soon as I said it, I felt this pouring of the same or almost exactly the same feeling of when I listen to music and feel deep and connected feelings to my soul, heart, and life. This feeling is extremely pleasurable and unlike most feelings of pleasure, it feels complete and whole. Not saying you don't want more, but it doesn't leave you with an emptiness. It is fully satisfying. Every second of it. No, every millisecond. I am grateful I am even able to feel that. The way I called out to god was in a normal voice but with pure sincerity and a lot of emotion. After that feeling, I realized god does hear me, know me, and might actually love or care about me. I am starting to believe that god loves me because of other events, but in relation to this one, it is because that feeling also felt full of a kind of water like love and compassion. I was a cup and god was pouring himself into me. So that is my story.

As I consciously decided to wake up I said " I am ready to wake up now" out loud in my meditative dream. It was really hard to wake up and in the process I almost went under ANOTHER level of deepness that felt like it would be nearly impossible to wake up from. I might have decided to explore that deeper layer, but I needed to wake up to workout before I ran out of time to work on my homework so I didn't. As I made a physical effort within my meditative dream to wake up I saw a baby panda in one of the layers on my room's floor. I felt like it was meant to scare me like a jump scare. I took advantage of that and picked it up and looked at it to scare me awake. Then, I awoke. Refreshed and had a pretty good workout. What do you guys think? I am getting tired of this demon and psychotic stuff. I believe it is real. Some things I believe is that people are laughing at me, that their fake coughing is directed towards me to scare or unsettle me, and finally that the devil is real and is trying to **** with me and get me.

Curious, do you want it to be real? How do you feel about practicing what you are doing in the future, since you sometimes have these experiences?

I read you post here, and I"m reminded how sometimes I will sit, clear the mind, focus on relaxing and comforting things. I will state now, that I'm always on the fence on whether it's real or not. For me, it's kind of like, I'll take it or leave it. I wonder if you should pin point it in some level of it being just your body reaction to it. There is another to ask your instincts.

To me, something like this always strikes me as dangerous. (If it's just a body reaction, even then who knows what your body is capable of) I have a friend who told me about her experience of deeply meditating and then her soul leaving the body to just hang some where outside and just hovering there for a few minutes. Despite this being a pleasant experience to her, I wonder on the danger of it. I wonder if you need to be guided by a professional, (and I'm saying this on how to meditate) to achieve what you are trying to achieve. I wonder than if that is why you are getting such negative experiences.

Edit to note: I may have misread a bit of your post, and if I did, I'm sorry. I do understand what you mean and I still wonder if you need a guide for proper meditation to have complete positive experiences. I'm not an expert.

Edited by Stubbly_Dooright
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Is IMHO "in my home only" ?

IMHO, In My Humble Opinion. :)

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Maybe I do. My goal is to...hmmmm. It is a mix of ideas and desires.... Mostly, I do it to escape, run away from, and excuse my responsiblity towards life. I look for a fix that can fix things. I look for that perfect thing or experience that will make my problems go away and give me pleasure. That last part is the next thing; pleasure. I desire and want pleasure that is valuable and means something. Also, for it to feel deep and really good. I guess I am willing to give into deulsions somewhat in order to obtain this pleasure, sometimes not. I also want comfort and a healing of myself from bad feelings and thoughts I have all the time. Being in emotional discomfort or pain for so long makes you willing and somehwat desperate to do things. And do I want it to be real? I believe the answer is, or should be better than taking it literally and being true the way it sounds. Again, I am polraized, I want it to be true for similar reasons as I stated above, while I also want it to be false to a large degree or totally because it feels and makes sennse to me that it is like a sick game I am playing with myself. This is game is also dangerous to all aspects of my health so that is why I am reluctant to do it at all.

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I used to meditate a lot but haven't been doing that in quite a while. When I did it was very helpful; it's helpful for creative people to sort out their feelings and kind of straighten up thought patterns.

When meditating I always find it helpful to wrap myself in protection. Not sure if you practice that but it might be something beneficial for you. What I do is imagine wrapping myself in protective white light that is solid and strong. That way, if you feel any negaitivity (or demons in your words) then you know deep down you are protected. This way it's easier to feel even more relaxed and go deeper.

With regards to people possibly messing with you... to hell with them!!! I mean if they ARE then they aren't worth your precious time. It could be that they are not and you are just being overly sensitive maybe. Anyways, people who usually make fun or poke at others usually have their own issues of insecurity and the need to look Alpha. If you learn where this all comes from it helps and even sometimes you pity them.

Cool post. Sounds like an awesome journey :)

Edited by She-ra
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i've heard similar stories on this actually so yeah i think its true,

I dont believe in God, i know there is a God. Never believed in anything for 30 years i'm 32 now and had this weird experience this time last year that just answered every question i wanted answered, that there is a God.

But cheers for the tip, never been a big a fan of meditation could never sit around long enough but willing to give it a shot

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An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life...

"A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.

"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

"One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego.

"The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

"This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,

"Which wolf will win?"

The old chief simply replied,

"The one you feed."

http://www.firstpeople.us/FP-Html-Legends/TwoWolves-Cherokee.html

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What do you guys think? I am getting tired of this demon and psychotic stuff. I believe it is real. Some things I believe is that people are laughing at me, that their fake coughing is directed towards me to scare or unsettle me, and finally that the devil is real and is trying to **** with me and get me.

Well, the old adage is, Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean that they are not out to get you. But...let's break this down okay:

1. you know the voices in your head are you

2. you should know...and if you don't...I am telling you now...everything in your mind is you. Fears, especially. Point to fear tomatoedrama...point at it in the room where you are...yeah...it is in your head. You choose the thoughts you think...maybe you don't have absolute control over your thoughts...that's okay too...it's a jouney..it's a work that is always in progress.

When I was in college...I always thought people were laughing at me...I don't know why...I would hear laughter and start looking to see if my fly was unzipped or what. I also noticed that it was hard for me to make eye contact with people just walking to class...I always avoided eye contact. I was self conscious for no reason other than fear. But one day...I thought I'm just going to look at this girl in the eye as I walk by. Guess what...she was avoiding eye contact with me...and I soon discovered that ...a lot of people were.

Just remember that it is all in your mind. You allow the imagery to develop as you meditate. You are creating the figures in your head...you are your brain...you are your mind. Take control. You can. To the best of your ability...continue to remove the 'unreal' and focus on what IS real.

My advice....nothing more nothing less. :yes:

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Well, the old adage is, Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean that they are not out to get you. But...let's break this down okay:

1. you know the voices in your head are you

2. you should know...and if you don't...I am telling you now...everything in your mind is you. Fears, especially. Point to fear tomatoedrama...point at it in the room where you are...yeah...it is in your head. You choose the thoughts you think...maybe you don't have absolute control over your thoughts...that's okay too...it's a jouney..it's a work that is always in progress.

When I was in college...I always thought people were laughing at me...I don't know why...I would hear laughter and start looking to see if my fly was unzipped or what. I also noticed that it was hard for me to make eye contact with people just walking to class...I always avoided eye contact. I was self conscious for no reason other than fear. But one day...I thought I'm just going to look at this girl in the eye as I walk by. Guess what...she was avoiding eye contact with me...and I soon discovered that ...a lot of people were.

Just remember that it is all in your mind. You allow the imagery to develop as you meditate. You are creating the figures in your head...you are your brain...you are your mind. Take control. You can. To the best of your ability...continue to remove the 'unreal' and focus on what IS real.

My advice....nothing more nothing less. :yes:

BRAVO!!! HERE-HERE!!! Very well said Joc :clap:

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Also wanted to add I love that Cherokee story. I remember when I first heard it years ago and the impact it had on me. Still impacts me today. Thanks for the reminder :)

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Well, the old adage is, Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean that they are not out to get you. But...let's break this down okay:

1. you know the voices in your head are you

2. you should know...and if you don't...I am telling you now...everything in your mind is you. Fears, especially. Point to fear tomatoedrama...point at it in the room where you are...yeah...it is in your head. You choose the thoughts you think...maybe you don't have absolute control over your thoughts...that's okay too...it's a jouney..it's a work that is always in progress.

When I was in college...I always thought people were laughing at me...I don't know why...I would hear laughter and start looking to see if my fly was unzipped or what. I also noticed that it was hard for me to make eye contact with people just walking to class...I always avoided eye contact. I was self conscious for no reason other than fear. But one day...I thought I'm just going to look at this girl in the eye as I walk by. Guess what...she was avoiding eye contact with me...and I soon discovered that ...a lot of people were.

Just remember that it is all in your mind. You allow the imagery to develop as you meditate. You are creating the figures in your head...you are your brain...you are your mind. Take control. You can. To the best of your ability...continue to remove the 'unreal' and focus on what IS real.

My advice....nothing more nothing less. :yes:

Thanks. I believe there is some basis in reality for the idea that my physical reality can be and has changed based on my consciousness. I have watched a lot of videos explaining this and they come from different sources. I am biased towards a channeler named bashar, but quantum physics documentaries also point in that direction. Now, that I say this however, I am excited to get deeper into and find out more about myself. I want to learn and uncover the DEEPEST part of me. The core of what I am and what I believe. After that, I can finally let go of all the crap and have a chain reaction happen within me. I have had chain reactions happen before but not on a scale as I am describing. Maybe that would be dangerous though. And really, I want something to change me for me without me having to consciously deciding to change. That is very....challenging? for me. I am revealing so many negative and insecure things about me because I want an answer to my questions and confusion. I also want interaction and communication with other people focusing on it. Finally, I am doing it because it excites me and I want to feel better. Besides, being so honest to the public feels relieving. Edited by tomatoedrama
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I think you're doing great. It's sometimes scary looking at yourself and learning more about yourself. I think it's awesome that you are challenging yourself in new ways and moving forward in a healthy and positive way :tu:

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I think you're doing great. It's sometimes scary looking at yourself and learning more about yourself. I think it's awesome that you are challenging yourself in new ways and moving forward in a healthy and positive way :tu:

Thanks. One of the things I really like about myself is based on what that channeler bashar said, you can't "

perceive what you not the vibration of". So every time I see something in people or things I like it fascinates and excites me to just keep staring at it. An example would be the character zexion, which is what my profile picture is. I know his personality and I see so much of me in him. And that goes for all of the characters from that game. I love it. It makes me feel better and is really fun.

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Curious, do you want it to be real? How do you feel about practicing what you are doing in the future, since you sometimes have these experiences?

I read you post here, and I"m reminded how sometimes I will sit, clear the mind, focus on relaxing and comforting things. I will state now, that I'm always on the fence on whether it's real or not. For me, it's kind of like, I'll take it or leave it. I wonder if you should pin point it in some level of it being just your body reaction to it. There is another to ask your instincts.

To me, something like this always strikes me as dangerous. (If it's just a body reaction, even then who knows what your body is capable of) I have a friend who told me about her experience of deeply meditating and then her soul leaving the body to just hang some where outside and just hovering there for a few minutes. Despite this being a pleasant experience to her, I wonder on the danger of it. I wonder if you need to be guided by a professional, (and I'm saying this on how to meditate) to achieve what you are trying to achieve. I wonder than if that is why you are getting such negative experiences.

Edit to note: I may have misread a bit of your post, and if I did, I'm sorry. I do understand what you mean and I still wonder if you need a guide for proper meditation to have complete positive experiences. I'm not an expert.

Sharon, I am with you on this. Meditation is not what I am reading here. It is not negative at all, although one will encounter this in the mind (judgement) in the early stages, meditation is the cultivated technique of being deliberately attentive to ones own experince as it unfolds, without the undergirding of the usual commentary and conceptulizing that is a huge part of the minds nature. This poster is not describing meditation or mindfulness, he is describing mindlessness. He needs to recognize the difference. He is also superimposing his experince with preconceptions, this is not meditation either, yet it is where most begin their journey. This poster isn't aware yet that he is caught up in his own illusions/mental narratives, as Joc has pointed out. The journey of meditation can't even begin until he recognizes this first. With that being said the poster is exactly where he needs to be, and if he sticks with this and cultivates/ nurtures mindfulness his practice he will reach a point that personal wisdom will be mainstay of his meditation, anyone can mediate, yet few ever stick with it. Challenging oneself is a wonderful thing. Just like one doesn't sit down at the piano the first time and play Beethoven's Fur Elise. The same applies to meditation, it is a skill that is cultivated via practice. As you, I would (recommend) and did seek a private teacher.

Edited by Sherapy
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I do recognize that to some extent. I also meditate or just relax so that I can sort things out and feel better. I feel like better when I meditate so that is one of the main reasons I do it.

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I do recognize that to some extent. I also meditate or just relax so that I can sort things out and feel better. I feel like better when I meditate so that is one of the main reasons I do it.

You are also superimposing your experience with preconceptions, that is not meditation it is mindlessness. Reality begins when you recognize the difference. Wisdom is the ability to see the nature of realtiy clearly.

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Basically, I had a negative meditative dream that was fully interactive and felt very deep. At the end though, I called out to god in fear and desperation and I felt awater like feeling of pleasure, and I think love being poured into me. I also had a hard time waking up. It took a lot of physical effort and focus to.

Welcome to the world of lucid dreaming. If you want to find god, don't look to religion. Because finding God is a personal thing.

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You are also superimposing your experience with preconceptions, that is not meditation it is mindlessness. Reality begins when you recognize the difference. Wisdom is the ability to see the nature of realtiy clearly.

Can't really argue with that. Even now, as I re-read your posts to me, I recognize that I was reading it angrily and abusive to me. I am doing that because what your saying is similar to this other person that talks to me in a way that I don't like. So, I put two and two together. I do have wisdom just not the same kind you do. At this point in my life I would have to say......I don't see things clearly, yet I do. Some areas of life I am skilled in, while others are fuzzy. When combined, it creates an experience of being wise and seeing things clearly for situation and topic A. while topic and situation B. just stumps you.
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