296 replies to this topic

[Enoonmai]

Thanks for the wonderful advice. Can I get a second opinion? Does anyone know what is wrong with me out there in Disneyland?

[cenobite]

doc, how do i get this blood red wine stain from the carpet in the boot of my car?

[Eldorado]

cenobite, on 01 July 2012 - 05:55 PM, said:

doc, how do i get this blood red wine stain from the carpet in the boot of my car?

You can use hydrogen peroxide, baking soda, soda ash, vinegar, club soda, salt or a wide range of commercial products.

Personally, I'd destroy the car. No evidence is good evidence.

Edited by Eldorado, 01 July 2012 - 08:19 PM.

[cenobite]

Good advice can you lend me some petrol and matches

[Eldorado]

cenobite, on 02 July 2012 - 07:44 AM, said:

Good advice can you lend me some petrol and matches

No.  I'm Scottish and you look English, so I'll sell you some.

(lol)

Anyway...
if Worcestershire is anything like Lanarkshire I'm sure there is some street somewhere you can leave a car parked and it will mysteriously burst into flames pretty quickly... minus radio, tyres and anything shiny.

[booNyzarC]

Dear Dr. El,

I have a cat who is in heat and she just won't shut up.  Do you have any advice for how to deal with the situation?

[Eldorado]

booNyzarC, on 02 July 2012 - 08:50 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El,

I have a cat who is in heat and she just won't shut up.  Do you have any advice for how to deal with the situation?

Strangle it.  Tis your own fault for having a daft cat.  A dog is a man's best friend!

[booNyzarC]

Eldorado, on 02 July 2012 - 08:59 PM, said:

Strangle it.  Tis your own fault for having a daft cat.  A dog is a man's best friend!

That's the worst advice I've ever received from anyone, and though I can tell it was an attempt at humor, it wasn't funny.

[Eldorado]

booNyzarC, on 02 July 2012 - 09:04 PM, said:

That's the worst advice I've ever received from anyone, and though I can tell it was an attempt at humor, it wasn't funny.

Tough.

[booNyzarC]

Eldorado, on 02 July 2012 - 09:05 PM, said:

Tough.

I care pretty deeply about my cats.  I meant no offense.

[Eldorado]

booNyzarC, on 02 July 2012 - 11:02 PM, said:

I care pretty deeply about my cats.  I meant no offense.

Apologies, for upsetting you.  This is a joke thread so my advice is not to be taken seriously.

This is not a snide question but would you be just as upset if I had advised someone to strangle their wife cos she never shuts the hell up?

Anways... sorry for causing you distress.

[Old Man Waffles]

Dear Dr. El:
When i throw my pizzezza at a wall, why doesn't it turn into an ice cube?

[booNyzarC]

Eldorado, on 03 July 2012 - 12:29 PM, said:

Apologies, for upsetting you.  This is a joke thread so my advice is not to be taken seriously.

And here I thought you were a real Dr.

Eldorado, on 03 July 2012 - 12:29 PM, said:

This is not a snide question but would you be just as upset if I had advised someone to strangle their wife cos she never shuts the hell up?

Of course not, who cares about some random bloke's wife anyway?  Far less important than my cats.

Eldorado, on 03 July 2012 - 12:29 PM, said:

Anways... sorry for causing you distress.

You'd better be mister.  You'd better be!  

[Eldorado]

Insightful Waffles, on 03 July 2012 - 12:35 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El:
When i throw my pizzezza at a wall, why doesn't it turn into an ice cube?

Cos you're not cool enough.

Yet.

Edited by Eldorado, 03 July 2012 - 01:52 PM.

[Old Man Waffles]

can i ask for your advice on something else?...