Just the begining...but why me?

[earthygirl04]

My experiances began when I was only 8 years old. Yeah, I was really young, and even to this day I don't understand why me? Why when I was still basically just a baby? What did I ever do to deserve this to come after me? Why does he not stop? Questions that still have not been answered.

I've decided to start at the begining when it all first began and how it came to be.

It all began, like I said, when I was only 8 years old. My mom and stepdad and me lived in a singlewide trailer, only 2 bedrooms/1 bath. There was this really, really old creepy looking house across from us. It looked as if it would fall in any day. It was creepy looking. Anyway, one afternoon, one of us, I can't remember who, got this bright idea to go check out that old house and look around inside. So my mom,dad, and me, walked over to the old house. We found the doors unlocked , this due to the fact that it actually looked like it was going to fall in so there was nothing to be stolen out of it. We went inside, it was dirty, dusty, and falling apart inside. (Now here is where it starts...)

I don't remember who noticed it first. But on the back of the front door in that old house was a picture.....The picture was "CLEAN" , no dust on it, and the only that was left inside that old house. Get this,.....It was or should I say, .....looked like a picture of Jesus... Of-course me being only 8 , I wanted it.

My stepdad looked at it and didn't even touch the picture, and said ,"NO." Of-course I start whinning about how I want it, my mom is saying to my dad,"Why can't she have it? Nobody lives here, (hadn't in many years), and then she went on to say it's just a picture of Jesus. Finally he gave in and took it down from the back of that old, dusty,falling apart, front door. (Remember I said the picture was "clean"? How could that have been? The rest of the house including the door it hung on was filthy! ) Now this picture, I said "looked" like Jesus, but the eyes were strange looking, they didn't seem right. But being a picture of "Jesus", my mom and I overlooked everything else. My stepdad didn't ( he told us later he had noticed it all, and had a bad feeling about it, that's why he argued about me having it.) So we walk back to our trailer, and my mom asks," where do you want to hang it?" Now, my bedroom door was odd, it wasn't a regular door. It slid sideways, instead of opening up normally. It was made that way, I guess that means it was an old trailer. So I told my mom to hang the picture on the inside of my bedroom on the sliding door. That way I would be able to see it with, or without the bedroom door closed. (Now I wouldv'e never laid eyes on that picture!!!)

First off let me also explain. The foot of my bed was towards the doorway. The light switch to my bedroom was on the wall above my head (wacko huh? ) and at night it wasn't unusual for my mom to peek in on me to make sure I was ok, or asleep, and sometimes instead of coming all the way in the room she would just peek her head around the corner at me.

So that very night I was asleep. Something woke me, and that's when I noticed the head peeking around the corner of my bedroom doorway, looking at me. All I could see was a face and eyes. Not red eyes, just normal looking eyes. I thought it was my mom and just waking up I was thirsty, it was like 12:00 -2:00 in the morning. So I called out,"Mom." The face which was pitch black, blacker than the dark,but I could still see the shape, andl I could see the eyes, but when I said mom, I saw it grin!Even though this face was darker than the dark, I could see the eyes and the grin!! Ok, I was a child, and I guess pretty stupid because I'm still thinking this is my mom. So I repeat just a little louder,"Mom." (Bigger grin!) Ok, then I began getting nervous and say even louder ,"MOM?" Nothing but a dark face with eyes and a big grin,.... then I noticed!!! That can't be my mom!!!! The head was at the very top of my doorway, in the top right corner!!! (My mom's not that tall) I began screaming!!! As I began screaming "he/it" began laughing! I am freaking out,and screaming for my mom the whole time "he/it" was actually watching me and laughing! Finally my mom hits the doorway, then she scares me because I see her there but she's not coming in, and the dark head that was laughing at me saw her, and it kept laughing! I saw my mom trying to come in, but she wasn't coming into the room. ( She later told me, when I was older, that she couldn't get thru the doorway! It was like there was a wall there and it was pushing her back and she just couldn't break past it.) My stepdad, shoved my mom out of the way ,(mind you, I'm still screaming hysterically! All the while "that" face was still laughing out loud!) My stepdad hit the doorway and he too couldn't get in. I saw dad struggle, then "he/it" looked down and saw my dad, and "he/it" stoped laughing. It quickly vanished and my dad literally "fell" into my room. He turned on the light, and grabed me up and my mom was behind him (she was able to come in too now that, "that face" was gone) I tried to tell them what I saw and my dad lifted me up to the doorway and made me point out where it had been (Top right corner of the doorway). Well, no need to say, my mom and I slept in the front room for the rest of the night! And to top it off....my dad sleep with their bedroom light on "all" night! Years later my mom tells me that she to saw that "face" that same night as we were sleeping in the front room. She said it peeked around the corner out of "my" bedroom ( my bedroom doorway was right the at the begining of the hallway by the frontroom) and mom said it looked at her and grinned, and she too heard "it" laugh. She said that she told "it", to go away, he wasn't getting her daughter (or something like that).

Then the next day, middle of the day, "DAY light" , I wanted to go into my bedroom to get a toy out of my toybox which was actually in my closet. So, I go in there and open my closet and start digging thru my toy box. I hear a laugh, and when I looked up....there "it" was again!!!! In the daytime!!! I start screaming, and in runs my mom with only a slight amount of trouble getting in, and then "it" was gone! Naturally, I don't want to sleep in that room again, so my mom makes me a bed on the floor in her bedroom right next to her side of the bed. Sometime a few days later, the "hot" water pipe busted, and guess where that hot water pipe happened to be? In my bedroom wall at the head of my bed! (Floor level) So my bedroom get's totally flooded with steaming hot water! Another night or two later, in the middle of the night my mom and dad wake me up out of sleep because dad was picking me up off the floor (where I was sleeping by their bed) and we were rushing out the backdoor ( which was in the hall back by their bedroom doorway.) , because the trailer was on fire! Yep, once again, it was in my bedroom!!

I remember us rushing from the trailer in our car and my dad cussiong and saying if there's anything left in the morning we'll come back and get it. As we drove away we saw my bedroom on fire thru the window...

We went and stayed at my stepdad's parents (my grandparents) and the next day my mom and dad went over to the trailer to see what the damage was. I didn't go! They came back bring our stuff! Our furniture clothes, everything! They said that it hadn't burnt down! There was nothing to show there was a fire! It looked fine! Well, no need to say we moved to a different house, but after that experiance, I couldn't sleep in my own bedroom for a very long, long time!!!

That's when, where, and how it all started for me. I call it the Devil,the Demon, or sometimes just "it". And sadly, that was just the begining for me.......

What I want to know is, why? Especially when I was so young and innocent! Why bother me my entire life? What did I do at that young of an age to have the Devil come after me?

[CatAstrofix]

I think what we get in this life is rarely dependant on what we would deserve

I'm sure that nothing you did caused this. I guess it could be called just bad luck..

How about now days? Is that demon still haunting you? What have you tried to do to get rid of it?

I suppose "why" is the biggest question, but knowing "what" or "how" might also help.

Best wishes

[earthygirl04]

I still have problems to this day, although the problems will decrease for months before something else occurs. When I was young it was just about everynight. So I am thankful it isn't like that anymore.

I have always wonder about this,( the why's) and I haven't really had the courage to speak of this before, (outside of family) until recently. I was hoping someone could shed some light on this subject for me. What do you think it really is? I call it a demon or the devil, because it just "feels" evil. Has anyone else out there ever had this "thing" come to them?

[freaky6]

all i can say is that story was hella scary, i would have run my ass off if it were me..i hope that doesn't happen to you again.

to answer your question, i have had this red man, dressed in flames come to me once when i was five, i was freaked out and everywhere i went he followed juggling some sort of flameballs and when i tried to wake up my parents they wouldn't wake up and i could hear him say "they won't believe you" so i finally jumped in my parents bed and pulled the blanket over me and closed my eyes till i fell asleep

[doomgirl]

I'd say the reason these creature do this is because there are attracted to the young and innocent

[earthygirl04]

freaky6, that was freaky!!! Your only the second person I've ever heard mention a red man coming after him. Of-course, I never heard anything about it juggling flame balls...

But to answer your question about it happening again, the answer is, "yes", many, many times as I was growing up. Although it has slacked up, it still happens now and then. I just don't understand why. I thought for a long time maybe I had done something so bad to cause this demon/devil to bother me. But as I have gotten older I have thought about it. What could I have done at the age of 8 to make a demon/devil bother me for the rest of my life? I was only 8 for heavens sake!

So I can think of nothing that an 8 year old could possibly do that was so bad, to have the devil come after you!! Any clues as to why at such young ages the devil comes knockin' (so to speak)?

[earthygirl04]

I'd say the reason these creature do this is because there are attracted to the young and innocent

Why? To try to get to us before we have had a chance to grow a conscience, or form opinions? Or looking for new recruits?

I'm sorry,...I just don't get it.....

[haunted-one61]

I don't get it, either. I am glad that you were able to talk to your mom and stepdad about it, at least, especially being an only child. I was the youngest of five, and the only one who could just seem to know things, have precognitive dreams from time to time, and unfortunately, the only one who could SEE things. That made it very hard, nobody ever believed me. TWOREDRUBYSHOES mentioned on my thread that I must be a very strong person. I never really thought of myself that way, but I guess I learned to be, because I had to pretty much keep it all to myself. I felt like an oddball at times. When I was smaller, I just thought everyone could see what I did. It's not that I had a bad family life, but they would not accept or listen what I would tell them was going on.

I was always told: "You just had a nightmare, go back to sleep" or "Your eyes are playing tricks on you" or "There isn't anything in the dark that isn't here in the light" or "You're keeping the whole house awake! Go to sleep!" My older sister teased me relentlessly. I was 6 1/2 when it started to get bad. Your story about the Jesus picture brought back a long supressed memory; the painting in my memory is not of Jesus, though, it was a copy of a Picasso. The Picasso was bought before we moved into our new house, and I don't remember having an issue with it until we moved....so I think that house (although new) had an issue. That's the same house my parents were living in where I first saw the red eyes. Maybe I'm onto something here, and maybe not, but that belongs on my thread....I don't want to take over this one. I wish I had an answer, I came here looking for answers, too. Maybe they go after the ones who they know can see/hear/feel them????

[xanubia]

Wow. What happened after that? What other encounters have you had? I personally do not believe you were being visited by the Devil...I think you were being haunted by a Jinn, which is kind of like a Genie (except they aren't prisoners of lamps and they don't give wishes). Everything you've mentioned seems characteristic of these supernaturaly creatures, in my point of view anyway. Some Jinn are nice. You obviously got a bad one, who likes to scare and harass people...I have some stories handed down in my family by ancestors who suposedly had met Jinn.

[earthygirl04]

Thanks haunted_one61, for posting. It's because of you I had the courage to tell this to people I don't really know. I didn't like speaking of this to people outside of my family, because everyone else just assumed I was making it up. Yeah, I had my parents to talk to about it, but only at the moment when something would occur. Then I heard those exact same words...

I was always told: "You just had a nightmare, go back to sleep" or "Your eyes are playing tricks on you" or "There isn't anything in the dark that isn't here in the light"

It wasn't until years later, when I was much older that my mom and I really approached the subject with one another and she told me that her and my dad had believed me, because they had also saw things lurking around. But they didn't want to frighten me any more than what I was. I don't know if it wouldv'e made a difference, after all, I was already scared out of my mind!

But I guess they thought it was better to keep me from knowing that they too were worried, if not scared.

[earthygirl04]

xanubia,....What exactly does a Jinn do? Want?

And why? And yes... I've had alot of experiances!! I've even saw the back part of the body of this "thing" as he/it was along side of my bed, on his/it's hands and knees, looking me in the face and saying,"Hello Edith" in a deep voice!

Edited August 1, 2004 by earthygirl04

[Tia]

It could be a nasty spirit, they can appear in an image which would scare you most.

[earthygirl04]

It could be a nasty spirit, they can appear in an image which would scare you most.

But the problem with that is, it wasn't "in" the picture.... It just all started happening to me after I got the picture. I just assumed the picture had something to do with it. You know like bringing the demon in, and making it come after me, since I'm the one who wanted the picture in the first place... But I can deffinately say, it wasn't in a picture! It was in my doorway!!

[haunted-one61]

Thank you, earthygirl04. I'm so glad I could finally feel like I could help someone else for a change. It seems like it's always me asking for everyone else's help. I have something out in the hallway right now, I've been seeing something whisking by now and then for about two hours. I would like to cross the hall and take a bath before going down to bed .......It took a lot of courage for me, too. I could talk to my brother and sisters about anything at all except this stuff. I couldn't talk to my ex about this stuff, but he's another story for another day....just my husband now.

This site has been great for me, because even though I haven't solved the problem yet, there's a lot of helpful caring people who don't think you're crazy.

[haunted-one61]

Oh I forgot to ask.....can someone elaborate on the jinn?

[spyro_86]

earthygirl04

The picture that you took from the old decrepit building was used as a vessel for the being to hibernate in. All beings eventually start to lose power after awhile without having people around to scare in order to feed off of. I'm guessing you were the first person to touch the picture. If not the fact that you kept insisting to have the picture when your father told you no let the being choose you as it’s next “host”. You made the matters worse by having the picture hung in your room. You were the first person it had in its surroundings in a long time and it wanted energy. You were alone in your room. The being or demon as you call it chose you because you were at the age where most people’s part of the brain that allows them to see beings begins to degenerate, yours however was still intact. So considering it had the choice of your parents or you, you were the easier target for it because at that age you are more susceptible to beings.

The first night when it showed itself to you, you believed it to be your mother then after you began calling out to it you started to notice something was wrong and you began to get more and more afraid as you kept calling it your mother. It new it was tricking you and what was about to happen. It was happy that it was tricking you, when you finally noticed that it wasn’t you mother and you began screaming you made it stronger and let it know that you were a good power source and it decided to latch on to you. Your fear is energy for it. That’s why you are still plagued by it but not as much because over time you have lost some of the part of your brain that allows you to see it and other things like it in our world. Bad things have happened to you since, maybe by it or maybe just because of bad luck and every time something does happen you most likely think of it and fear arises within you. So you are still thinking about it and the fear it caused you so you are powering it and it chooses to stay with you.

You said it was able to hold your parents from entering your room for a while, and that was after years of being in a hibernation of sorts. You mentioned your parents were able to see it too, that means it really is strong. Over the years your fear of it has probably made it much stronger. Consider getting rid of it with your parents; your father seems to be a bit aware of things. There are many ways to do this, but if what you say is true it probably would be able to hurt you. I’m not sure if your family is religious or not but consider getting your church to help. If not try to find something out about the previous occupants of the house that you first got the picture and why the people had left. The more you can find out about them the better. Try burning sage wherever you have seen it while saying something along the lines of telling it to stop and leave you in peace or to go away. Don’t get angry and start screaming at it, you’ll just anger it and make it worse.

Hope that helps…

[spyro_86]

haunted-one61

As I understand it a jinn is an evil genie who is free to do as it wishes,good or bad.

I did a search in google and this place has some good information about jinn. But it mentions the quran allot for proof.

http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Park/6443/Jinn/

Hope that helps...

Edited August 2, 2004 by spyro_86

[Fluffybunny]

Hmmm...to me this spirit/vision/nightmare or whatever you experienced didn't seem all bad. Had he not scared you out of sleeping in your own room, wouldn't you be burned badly by the hot water pipe bursting?

[Tia]

Hi earthygirl04,

What I meant was the spirit came to you in an image of something that would scare you. If you had seen santa clause standing there you more than likely would not have been scared. By showing itself in a form you found frightening it got the responce it was after.

Do you still find it as scary?

[earthygirl04]

spyro_86, Thank you. You have made it a little more clearer to me now.

You really made alot of sense. I was the first one to touch the picture when we found it, and I was drawn to it so much so, that I just had to have it! I still see this demon/thing from time to time. I've even had an experiance where I believe it was him/it in a human form.He had first came to me in my dream, and then exactly three days later he walked up to my door!! (But that's another story.)

I am unable to find out any thing about the house I first got that picture out of.Like I said it was when I was only 8. I'm now 37. The house was long ago torn down, (or it fell in and was removed) and I never did know of any people actually living in the house, way before we ever went in and found that picture. I use to be so scared of "it" that I couldn't even talk about "it"!!! Now I get scared but I think I am doing a little better and I'm not as scared as I use to be.

My parents are not religious, and although I once was very much involved in church I am not any longer. I have had him/it come into my room as if on his hands and knees, coming up to the side of my bed (this has happened several times) but the last time, which happened more recently,I hadn't fallen asleep yet,and I heard a noise at the foot of my bed,as I looked down at the foot, I saw his back creeping around the foot of my bed begining to come up the side. I was scared but I stayed still with my back to the side of the bed,(which was extremly hard, because you know what it feels like to have something right smack behind you, that before you turn around you "know" you would be face to face with whoever it is? I said out loud,"No. I'm not even rolling over to look at you!" (to myself I kept thinking,"If I don't look I won't scream, he can't hurt me if I don't look at him.") In the meantime my heart was pounding out of my chest, but I didn't roll over to look!!! Then after a few minutes had gone by I "felt" him leave.(If only I can be that strong every time. It's the times which he appears so unexpectantly, that I can't help myself, but he scares me so bad I scream.)

I haven't burned any sage, but I have burned sandlewood incense to cleanse and purify away all the negativity and evil in my house. I have to do this "alot", after I first do it, the house feels peaceful, but it only seems to last for a day or so. By the way, the picture that started it all, up and disappeared when I was around 13. I never hung it on my wall again but I kept it rolled up with a rubberband around it and put way back into a drawer. I just couldn't seem to part with it, although I am unsure why, because I was to scared to even look at the dang thing agian! One day my aunt came over when I was about 13 and we all started talking about experiances we had, and my aunt wanted to see this picture. My mom told me to go ahead and get it, and although I didn't want to see it, I was going to give it to them and then leave the room. When I went to get it it was gone! I went back and told everyone it was gone and my mom even came in to help me look but it was no-where to be found! And to this day both parents still say they never touched it! So what happened? The picture disappeared, but the demon still hung around!

Thanks again spyro_86, you have helped me understand a little, which is more than I did before.

[earthygirl04]

Hmmm...to me this spirit/vision/nightmare or whatever you experienced didn't seem all bad. Had he not scared you out of sleeping in your own room, wouldn't you be burned badly by the hot water pipe bursting?

Hummm......??????? Sorry Fluffybunny, I just can't believe that "thing" was doing me a favor. After all, he's still, as I say," After me."

[spyro_86]

The being that you see is rather strong if the aroma of sandalwood wears off after a couple of days. It doesn't seem like it wants to hurt you, just get energy from you. It knows it can easily harvest it from you because you sound like you get really emotional when you feel its presence around you. You probably still get what feels like a knot in your chest of fear every time it comes around. True? It will probably never go away on it's own because through the years you have become a reliable energy source to it. You should try getting holy water or some sutras of some sort to help get rid of the being or at least keep it at bay. It doesn’t matter that your not religious, all that matters is that you strongly believe that what you use to get rid of or keep the being at bay will work. Try not to think about it at all after you try to get rid of it and although you might feel awkward ask someone if they could be there with you when you try to get rid of it. It will let you be more comfortable when doing it and will help keep you focused at the time.

[earthygirl04]

spyro_86 Posted on Aug 3 2004, 02:27 AM

  You should try getting holy water or some sutras of some sort to help get rid of the being or at least keep it at bay. 

You made me think spyro_86. When I was involved in church several years back, I used annointed oil in my house, in every room, to keep everything bad away. Bad karma, negativity, blessing the house, etc.. I have thought back on it, and I realized that I didn't really have any problems with this demon/thing. The only thing that had happened during that time of really being involved in my church, was sometimes I would feel someone watching me, and sometimes it was so strong that I was a little afraid to go into a dark room because I could "feel" "it" in there, like "it" was waiting. (I feel silly saying this but I would have to stick my hand around the doorway and flick the light on before I could even go in the room.) It wasn't like that everytime. Sometimes I didn't feel anything there and I would walk right on in the dark room, without even turning the light on. But I wonder if it had to do with the annointed oil I used regularly, or the fact that I was so involved in church? (I was the adult sunday school teacher, so I was always studing my bible preparing for the next lesson, my husband was the deacon, so he also studied his bible and he also sang during altar calls,etc..We also attended church regularly, anywhere from 3 nights a week,which was normal church times,... to 5 or 6 nights, during revivals.Which we had every couple of months.) What do you think? As I have stated in many forums throughout UM, I no longer am involved with church, ( some reasons I will not say)but because I have found myself asking too many questions concerning religion, I am now a bit confused. Could it be that this demon/thing kept his distance for awhile during my "church phase" (which lasted around 4 & 1/2 years), but now that I no longer even attend a church, he is trying to "creep" back in (so to speak)?Don't get me wrong, he isn't scaring the crap out of me every night or every few nights anymore.But yes I do still fear him. Sometimes I don't see him for many months at a time now. Then it'll be just one "maybe two" times, and then months will pass before another experiance. I'm thankful it's only that often now and not like before, which was from every night to several times a week. Although he/it stills tries coming around, It's much better now, because it's way less often. I just have never understood, "why me?" You have shed some light on that question for me.

The being that you see is rather strong if the aroma of sandalwood wears off after a couple of days. It doesn't seem like it wants to hurt you,

As for this not wanting to hurt me, I question that. My husband can tell you how he had to reach down and grab me in the middle of the night and pull me back onto the bed, because something had ahold of my legs around my ankles, and was pulling me down at the foot of the bed!! Scarier thing is, I was hanging onto my husbands legs screaming as my waist down was hanging off of the bed, and I felt as if I was being pulled into a deep, deep hole! I felt no floor underneath me! My legs were just dangling straight down! I'll never forget that! My husband was in such shock for a second that he didn't do anything except stare with his mouth wide open! Finally he panicked and reached down and grabed me by the arms and pulled me back up onto the bed. After awhile when the initial shock wore off we both looked at the floor at the foot of the bed, and sure enough there was a floor, but it wasn't there earlier I can tell you that! So what was that all about? If he doesn't want to hurt me what's he want? To carry me off to.....???

[Q-La]

Hi earthlygirl, it's sad to hear bad such bad experience for a little girl of your age and its still bothering you. Isn't it obvious that that thing fear God and your faith/connection with God? You can be stronger than it, you know, if you are still in communion with God! We christians should know better about the spiritual battle, and with such awful experiences I really hope you'll stick to the one that is so willing to protect you.

Peace,

Q-La

[Reader]

I just have never understood, "why me?"

You nor i will ever know... see.. i think that this ghost (what you will) is attached to you in a way that even you can't seem to disconnect...let me explain....

If you haven't read a few of my posts.. i'll catch you up.: i deal with ghosts day in and day out... all walks of life .. or shall i say death.. .. they are no different than people... because they're just dead people.... they don't fall into catagories.. that's like saying that when we get sick.. we just fall into catagories.. (we have no individuality.).. now.. from my experiances.. some come to "feast" on your output energy... some want comfort.. some want support... and some... some just want... want to hurt you.. .(or shall i say me. ..)

For the longest of times.... lets see.... from when i was about 7 (maybe 7 & 1/2) ghosts of the bad sort attached to me...(yes.. plural)... now... they controlled me in a sence of telapathy(sp?) but not.. like... i suppose from my soul... i dunno.. but in the end.. i ended up hurting myself with my brain.. (not with a book... willing it upon myself subconsiously)... anyway... there was one.. i like to call him Rand right now... well Rand liked to come to me when i was most happy and *"attack" me.. . not a cool thing...

*attack: "feast" on my output energy and pertty much cream me from any bit of energy... wear me out to the point of not haveing energy...

This "attacking" happened from when i was 7 to when i was 12.. . (i'm only 15... so this is all vivid rescent) and Rand stopped "attacking" me because i went into meditation (well... my sort of meditation) and found out that he was controlling me... and if i'd wish.. i'd could cut him out. ... out of my head... out of my soul.. out of my life... (it took weeks of meditation.. but i did it )... Strong "evil" enitities(what you will) come by every once and a while.. all new "people"... because as you know... not everyone is good...

i'd have to say it's not so much the whys that you should be asking... (to them.. there is no innocence.. ... they "feast" on any age.. but the young are more vulnerable..) but more along the Hows...

1 how can i get him to not scare me?

2 how can i get him out of my head?

3 (how can i get him out of my soul?)

4 how can i get him out of my life?

You answer the hows.. you solve your problem! Good luck!

Reader