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The Bad Advice Game


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1927 replies to this topic

#16    Bracket

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Posted 08 October 2011 - 08:26 PM

Nah, just stick your fingers in the nearest electrical socket. Everything should be fine.  :tu:

I get news that a zombie outbreak is immenent. What should i do?

I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

*Note to self, need more henchman, good ones this time. Also, start auditions for new female lab assistant.

#17    Princess Tumbleweed

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Posted 08 October 2011 - 11:42 PM

Don't buy any guns or ammo, Don't stock up on flashlights or batteries, forget about duct tape, Don't buy wood, nails or can goods. Leave all of your animals outside.

my hands keep getting cold, what should I do?

The Mighty oak was once a little nut that stood its ground


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#18    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 06:55 AM

View PostPrincess Tumbleweed, on 08 October 2011 - 11:42 PM, said:

Don't buy any guns or ammo, Don't stock up on flashlights or batteries, forget about duct tape, Don't buy wood, nails or can goods. Leave all of your animals outside.

my hands keep getting cold, what should I do?

Sleep with your hands in the freezer.Posted Image

My boyfriend is a vampire and he keeps bringing dead girls home. Posted Image How do i stop him?Posted Image

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#19    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 10:20 AM

Donít stop him, embrace his vampireness and organize vampire pride parade. Also, you should feel ashamed of not understanding and supporting him from the start.

I have few hundred walnuts to crush. What technique do you suggest?

Posted Image

The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#20    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 01:20 PM

View PostHelen of Annoy, on 09 October 2011 - 10:20 AM, said:

Don't stop him, embrace his vampireness and organize vampire pride parade. Also, you should feel ashamed of not understanding and supporting him from the start.

I have few hundred walnuts to crush. What technique do you suggest?

Put them in a bag. Put the bag on the table. Keep banging your head on that bag till the walnuts break or your head bleeds. Posted Image


I want to fly. How do i do it?

Posted Image

#21    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 01:41 PM

Obviously, itís not enough to simply jump out the window or off the bridge and flap your arms. You have to wear bathrobe or a trench coat, for sufficient surface that will create flying squirrel or bat effect.
If you donít want to flap your arms that much, stand on airport runway with an open umbrella and ride the airwaves of planes that take off.

My nose is running, I have to constantly wipe it, what should I do?

Posted Image

The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#22    Feenix Fire

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 04:22 PM

Let it run. Boogers make great lip moisturizer.

I'm fresh out of make up. What can I use to pretty myself up?

Posted Image
My own little fairy!  ^_^

#23    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 04:23 PM

Cow dung:P

I bite my nails.How do i stop it?

Posted Image

#24    FLOMBIE

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Posted 09 October 2011 - 04:38 PM

Two things you could do: Either have your fingers chopped off, or your teeth pulled. Maybe you should go for both, just to be on the safe side.

I have a job interview coming up. What should I look out for?


#25    Princess Tumbleweed

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 12:50 AM

Ask them if they can pay you in cash because you have a few debts that could be garnished. Ask them to forgive your criminal record, that you did community service and 2 years probation so your time is served. Ask how many smoke breaks are allowed and if they have B-day parties,if so could they make your cake gluten free.

I need new clothes, what should I do?

The Mighty oak was once a little nut that stood its ground


Posted Image


#26    Feenix Fire

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 02:14 AM

Break into your neighbor's place and take theirs.

I'm thinking of opening a bakery. What should I name it?

Edited by Feenix Fire, 10 October 2011 - 02:14 AM.

Posted Image
My own little fairy!  ^_^

#27    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 09:55 AM

View PostFeenix Fire, on 10 October 2011 - 02:14 AM, said:

Break into your neighbor's place and take theirs.

I'm thinking of opening a bakery. What should I name it?

MOLDY AND STINKY BROS.


I have a bad migraine, what should i do?

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#28    Princess Tumbleweed

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 06:15 PM

Play really loud music and eat ice cream very fast

I want to win the lottery

The Mighty oak was once a little nut that stood its ground


Posted Image


#29    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 06:17 PM

Drill a hole in your forehead to let evil spirits out.
Kidding. It’s not evil spirits that cause the migraine.
Drill a hole in your forehead to release the pressure.

What’s the easiest way to move my computer from one office to another?



Edit: PT, first, don't buy any lottery tickets, if you're lucky, you'll find the winning one on the floor or magically materialized inside your pocket.

Edited by Helen of Annoy, 10 October 2011 - 06:18 PM.

Posted Image

The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#30    BiffSplitkins

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Posted 10 October 2011 - 06:54 PM

Quote

Whatís the easiest way to move my computer from one office to another?

I suggest building an elaborate Rube Goldberg machine powered initially by gerbils. This machine should include at least 368 steps to complete the moving process.

I need to close my pool for the winter. Is there a quick way to do this?

"The problem with internet quotes is that you cant always depend on their accuracy" -Abraham Lincoln, 1864

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