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Reasons men cannot win--LOL

Started by Robbie333 , May 17 2012 07:57 PM

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23 replies to this topic

#1    Robbie333

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 07:57 PM

Why Men Can't Win

- If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
- If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
- If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
- If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better.
- If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
- If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
- If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
- If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
- If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive.
- If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.
- If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
- If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
- If she asks you, it's a favor.
- If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
- If you don't, you're a slob.
- If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
- If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.
- If you're not, you're not ambitious.
- If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.
Robbie James

#2    Taun

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 08:02 PM

Why is this in the humor forum... This is just plain facts...





:devil:

#3    Robbie333

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 08:21 PM

View PostTaun, on 17 May 2012 - 08:02 PM, said:

Why is this in the humor forum... This is just plain facts...

  ...by golly, you have made a good point, LOL





:devil:

Robbie James

#4    Michelle

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 08:26 PM

And the problem is...???

Darn it....the little angel smiley, or any smiley for that matter, won't work right now. lol

#5    Robbie333

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 08:28 PM

View PostMichelle, on 17 May 2012 - 08:26 PM, said:

And the problem is...???

Darn it....the little angel smiley, or any smiley for that matter, won't work right now. lol

    LOL
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#6    spud the mackem

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Posted 17 May 2012 - 08:33 PM

View PostRobbie333, on 17 May 2012 - 08:28 PM, said:

LOL
  If I like her I might stay..!
(1) try your best, ............if that dont work.
(2) try your second best, ........if that dont work
(3) give up you aint gonna win

#7    HeartsAreForBreaking

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 03:12 AM

View PostRobbie333, on 17 May 2012 - 07:57 PM, said:

Why Men Can't Win

- If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
- If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
- If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
- If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better.
- If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
- If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
- If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
- If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
- If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive.
- If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.
- If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
- If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
- If she asks you, it's a favor.
- If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
- If you don't, you're a slob.
- If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
- If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.
- If you're not, you're not ambitious.
- If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.


But, but, but, what if she's worth it?! :unsure: And anyway this doesn't really apply to me, I just use members of the male persuasion for chocolate.
American with an accent, Christian with a tat, sociopath with a heart, child with no mother, Lover with no Lover, confidently doubting, amused but not laughing, woman but child, feisty yet caring, sweet when not bitter.

#8    Knight Of Shadows

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 05:04 AM

you think that's bad ? that's only 10% of the real problem :D

Allah, there is no God but He the Living the Eternal. no slumber can seize Him nor sleep

to Him belongs all that is In heavens and earth. who is there can intercede In His presence except what He permits

He knows what lies before them and what is after them. Nor shall they comprehend of his knowledge except as He wills

His throne extends over the heavens and earth

the preserving of them fatigues Him not and He is the most High and Glorious

#9    HeartsAreForBreaking

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 06:54 AM

I bet I could make a 110% more :devil:

Edited by ScreamingSarcasm, 19 May 2012 - 07:35 AM.

American with an accent, Christian with a tat, sociopath with a heart, child with no mother, Lover with no Lover, confidently doubting, amused but not laughing, woman but child, feisty yet caring, sweet when not bitter.

#10    spud the mackem

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 03:10 PM

Well my Mrs acknowledges that I am definitely without doubt "The absolute Head of the House",but that she is the neck and can manipulate the head anyway she wants,and she says IT WORKS...
Wedding is a succession of RINGS.
Engagement...R
Wedding...........I
Eternity............N
Suffer................G
(1) try your best, ............if that dont work.
(2) try your second best, ........if that dont work
(3) give up you aint gonna win

#11    Robbie333

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 03:34 PM

View PostScreamingSarcasm, on 19 May 2012 - 03:12 AM, said:

But, but, but, what if she's worth it?! :unsure: And anyway this doesn't really apply to me, I just use members of the male persuasion for chocolate.

   LOL,LOL,LOL. You are bad, LOL
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#12    HeartsAreForBreaking

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 03:46 PM

View PostRobbie333, on 19 May 2012 - 03:34 PM, said:

   LOL,LOL,LOL. You are bad, LOL
Well I'm sorry but it's true! All I want is a warm, willing piece of...chocolate! And you know, chocolate has caffeine in it, so if I don't get my fix, I may be prone more frequently to those "not tonight hunny" headaches. Hey, you've got your priorities, I've got mine, let's just get that straight right now.
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#13    Robbie333

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Posted 19 May 2012 - 03:50 PM

View PostScreamingSarcasm, on 19 May 2012 - 03:46 PM, said:

Well I'm sorry but it's true! All I want is a warm, willing piece of...chocolate! And you know, chocolate has caffeine in it, so if I don't get my fix, I may be prone more frequently to those "not tonight hunny" headaches. Hey, you've got your priorities, I've got mine, let's just get that straight right now.

  LOL, I can see your point,LOL
Robbie James

#14    Seeker79

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Posted 23 May 2012 - 05:58 AM

Crap..... So that's why I run off into the woods all the time.
"To know oneself is to study one self in action with another person. Relationship is a process of self evaluation and self revelation. Relationship is the mirror in which you discover yourself - to be is to be related."---Bruce Lee

#15    HeartsAreForBreaking

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Posted 23 May 2012 - 11:23 AM

"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition"- Marilyn Monroe :innocent:
American with an accent, Christian with a tat, sociopath with a heart, child with no mother, Lover with no Lover, confidently doubting, amused but not laughing, woman but child, feisty yet caring, sweet when not bitter.
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