368 replies to this topic

[Jinxdom]

Quote

Yeah, it's the whole modesty or humbleness senaro.. You can be humble or modest, but as soon as you mention that you develop yourself a new subtle ego.. And therein lays something of a paradox, because in order to promote virtues one must speak of them, but in doing so one destroys the virtue by making it egotistic..

There must be more to this and a way around this paradox other than a vow of silence.. But I can't put my finger on it..

There is a simple solution it is to not worry about what other people may think of you. Take it in to consideration but don't take it to heart. When a person who sees something as egotistical when it isn't there it is their issue not yours.
It is not what is being said but how and why it is being said that it the big deal.
It really isn't a paradox when you think it through.

[Likely Guy]

Another consideration not considered is the number of posts someone has, before we 'like' their comment. Any comments?

[Professor T]

Professor T, on 28 January 2013 - 02:36 AM, said:

Yeah, it's the whole modesty or humbleness senaro.. You can be humble or modest, but as soon as you mention that you develop yourself a new subtle ego.. And therein lays something of a paradox, because in order to promote virtues one must speak of them, but in doing so one destroys the virtue by making it egotistic..

There must be more to this and a way around this paradox other than a vow of silence.. But I can't put my finger on it..

joc, on 28 January 2013 - 02:49 AM, said:

I think it is called....death!

Defeatest..

Jinxdom, on 29 January 2013 - 05:29 AM, said:

There is a simple solution it is to not worry about what other people may think of you. Take it in to consideration but don't take it to heart. When a person who sees something as egotistical when it isn't there it is their issue not yours.
It is not what is being said but how and why it is being said that it the big deal.
It really isn't a paradox when you think it through.

Bingo on the highlighted bit imo, I quite often take that line of defence when someones actions or opinions are agressive.. But there you have it again, I use that as Defence.. And as it is being used as a defensive gesture it is a rather subtle Ego reaction more than a true centered self reaction.. but I think that is a good way to percieve conflict in Ego's, but it's only half of a solution..
I think it has less to do with how we percieve the world and more to do with how we interact with it.. The source of our interations with society are a dead givaway as to whether they are Ego driven or not, But I'm not sure how many people truely know where they seat or source of their interations comes from.. Eeh, it's a hard one to describe, but I think that if the intention behind our interactions are ego driven then the sponsoring emotion or intended outcome from the interation will be one of the following (Shame, Guilt, Apathy, Grief, Fear, Desire, Anger or Pride) Let's call these Emotions the EGO8
If however, even at subtle levels, the Intention behind the interation is not one of the EGO8, even at subtle levels, then the interation is from your True Self, and Not your Ego..

Is this partly what you meant?

[Professor T]

Sherapy, on 28 January 2013 - 11:11 PM, said:

I take a different perspective: think it is far easier to socialize in real life because there are other aspects to take into account-- e.g. body language-- the personal experience of knowing someone from spending quality time with them. I think online can be a great springboard for starting relationships or opening a door to one, but it can only be surface (for me) without spending time with a person/ or talking to them.

This is true..
But what I meant was that my online interations are kind of slower, more thoughtfull.

Have to admit to, that on the social front, I'm a bit of a dweeb..

[Professor T]

Likely Guy, on 29 January 2013 - 06:28 AM, said:

Another consideration not considered is the number of posts someone has, before we 'like' their comment. Any comments?

*sighs*

I think we've killed the like button.

Edited by Professor T, 29 January 2013 - 08:12 AM.

[Jinxdom]

Professor T, on 29 January 2013 - 07:52 AM, said:

Is this partly what you meant?

Pretty much nailed in on the head(need to explain that half of the solution part though), just complicated it up a bit

[joc]

Professor T, on 29 January 2013 - 08:06 AM, said:

*sighs*

I think we've killed the like button.

Oh, I don't think so...lol.
I Like the Like Button.  Mostly it says:  Hey here is a small kudos for you!
So here is a list of why I might Like Button someones post:

1. I just personally like them.
2. I like what they said in their post.
3. They Liked me so I Like them back.
4. Give them a heads up that I may have replied to their post.
5. Found common ground with someone I hadn't before.
6. I wanted them to know I read their post even if I didn't comment on it.

While there is Ego present in all of those reasons, I don't really associate the Like button with Ego to any great extent.
Personally, I like that people have Liked something I posted (Ego) but honestly, it gets tiresome just clicking the thing to see who Liked what.

[F3SS]

I like that Like List! But it isn't entirely accurate since many of us had hundreds or thousands of posts before it was ever a feature so the percentages can't be proof positive of how people feel about all of your posts. I probably had somewhere around 1000-1200 posts when the feature came out. It's accurate for Hasina since she's a newer member who posts like crazy and apparently says all the right things and has only been here after the button feature. Guys like Questionmark get tons of likes but he had around 25,000 posts before the feature came out so based on percentages it would appear that he gets no respect when in fact that's not true.

Edited by -Mr_Fess-, 29 January 2013 - 04:52 PM.

[Professor T]

joc, on 29 January 2013 - 01:48 PM, said:

Oh, I don't think so...lol.
I Like the Like Button.  Mostly it says:  Hey here is a small kudos for you!
So here is a list of why I might Like Button someones post:

1. I just personally like them.
2. I like what they said in their post.
3. They Liked me so I Like them back.
4. Give them a heads up that I may have replied to their post.
5. Found common ground with someone I hadn't before.
6. I wanted them to know I read their post even if I didn't comment on it.

While there is Ego present in all of those reasons, I don't really associate the Like button with Ego to any great extent.
Personally, I like that people have Liked something I posted (Ego) but honestly, it gets tiresome just clicking the thing to see who Liked what.

Yeah, I do like the like button.. Don't get me wrong, what's not to like about it, It's got like written on it! & a groovy little tick!
Also, just because you like something, bee it a comment, or recieving a like, doesn't automatically make it egotistical..
There is a true self behind the Ego that is equally capable of likeing something & being liked..

[Frank Merton]

I would guess I've "liked" about three times as many as have liked me, probably because I don't have to agree with what they said to like it.  (I remember one time liking a post that accused me of all sorts of things).

I think any post that is well expressed, says something both original and either valuable or funny (but not cynical) and is not just a "me too" should get likes.

Whenever I get a like in my notices, I can't wait to go back and see what I said that got it (bow to the OP).

That is one of the things I like about this board -- there is not that I have noticed a competition on this, and they don't have a "thumbs down."  (Use of such a thing would be to me a form of internet bullying).

[F3SS]

Frank Merton, on 29 January 2013 - 05:21 PM, said:

and they don't have a "thumbs down."  (Use of such a thing would be to me a form of internet bullying).

Probably right but anyone who denies an occasional yearning for a dislike button is lying. Don't let your egos get in the way of that truth.

[Sherapy]

Professor T, on 29 January 2013 - 08:05 AM, said:

This is true..
But what I meant was that my online interations are kind of slower, more thoughtfull.

Have to admit to, that on the social front, I'm a bit of a dweeb..

Why do you say/think you are a social dweeb? If I may ask (and I ask out of curiosity.)

[Sherapy]

Professor T, on 29 January 2013 - 07:52 AM, said:

Defeatest..

Bingo on the highlighted bit imo, I quite often take that line of defence when someones actions or opinions are agressive.. But there you have it again, I use that as Defence.. And as it is being used as a defensive gesture it is a rather subtle Ego reaction more than a true centered self reaction.. but I think that is a good way to percieve conflict in Ego's, but it's only half of a solution..
I think it has less to do with how we percieve the world and more to do with how we interact with it.. The source of our interations with society are a dead givaway as to whether they are Ego driven or not, But I'm not sure how many people truely know where they seat or source of their interations comes from.. Eeh, it's a hard one to describe, but I think that if the intention behind our interactions are ego driven then the sponsoring emotion or intended outcome from the interation will be one of the following (Shame, Guilt, Apathy, Grief, Fear, Desire, Anger or Pride) Let's call these Emotions the EGO8
If however, even at subtle levels, the Intention behind the interation is not one of the EGO8, even at subtle levels, then the interation is from your True Self, and Not your Ego..

Is this partly what you meant?

On others opinions?
Are you saying that a gentler approach works with you as opposed to a  direct/assertive approach?

Edited by Sherapy, 29 January 2013 - 11:11 PM.

[joc]

Sherapy, on 29 January 2013 - 11:10 PM, said:

On others opinions?
Are you saying that a gentler approach works with you as opposed to a  direct/assertive approach?

I 'Liked' your post...just because I 'like' you!

[B Randomly]

the L, on 28 January 2013 - 01:37 PM, said:

I wasnt sure about sceptic part.
But Im sure that you and BRandomly have great social skills.

Hah! I have someone hoodwinked!

I wouldn't say great..  I would say less than or equal to average.  I'm an introvert, so talking to people isn't really my thing.  I can talk to people, and am ok at it.. I just prefer not to.