TheBanana Posted September 16, 2011 #1 Share Posted September 16, 2011 i cant seem to get upset about issues unless they affect me or people i know. other people can get all upset about tragedies in the news and stuff, but i cant at all. it doesnt bother me, i feel "this is wrong, that person should not have died" but i cant feel as much emotion towards them as most people would. my friend thinks im a bit weird for this, but i cant understand the sadness about things that havent affected me, or how whenever something sad happens in the news like someone dying, everyones talking about how sad they are, theres loads of facebook statuses about it and how sad they all are. i just dont know what to say when talking to people about that-i cant think of any words for it, i probably will say something like "thats sad" or "sorry to hear that". ive never cried at sad movies, even things that loads of other people cry about. i can watch the saddest films ever without getting upset. i can get upset when things happen to myself, and also people who i love. if my best friend is sad, i feel bad for her and want to give her a hug, and i would get upset if a friend or relative died, so i do have emotions. some issues do upset me more, like if there was something on tv about something similar to something that has happened to a friend, i would feel upset. does anyone else feel like this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_Only Posted September 16, 2011 #2 Share Posted September 16, 2011 (edited) Maybe it comes down to how you were raised, and your social development. I don't think you're a bad person for it. If we stripped ourselves down to our basic selves (much like the rest of the animal world), you would only feel ties to those people who you live and interact with commonly, not some random person you have never met before, and never will. It would be important for you to have connected feelings with those who you live with daily, as it would aid in your survival. But our advanced human brains have left that survival oriented mind behind long ago, and have gotten way more complicated. But deep down we're still animals like the rest of them. Only now, we're animals who have to worry about how other animals (other people) think of us and our actions. And I know it's so politically incorrect to say, but sometimes people feign to care about something more than they actually do to feel that they fit in and gain acceptance from their peers or the general audience. Edited September 16, 2011 by Jerry Only Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portraitartist Posted September 16, 2011 #3 Share Posted September 16, 2011 Dear Friend, I spent a great deal of my career as a registered nurse and worked with a lot of people. here is a story that might help you some. I worked with a cardiac surgeon and my peers called him Dr D.Head. Well he had possibly the worst bedside manner of any Dr I ever knew. He was direct, short tempered, demanded strait answers, showed no verbal compassion, etc. And he was the same with staff, demanded excellence and rewarded "slackers" with quick discipline. I saw a nurse jump him for being "rude and abrupt" with a patients family. He replied "Madam, I am not here to coddle them, I am here to save their lives." And walked away. Well, I want to say this about him. He was and still is the best cardiac surgeon I have ever known. He is loving and protective with his wife and children. He is charitable and away from work I have seen him smile and cut up and get on a bender or two with friends and colleagues. No, I doubt you will ever see him cry at a movie or swoon over pictures of little kitties or puppies, but I would trust my life to him. I guess what I am saying is that we are all wired different and it needs to be that way. You are most likely fine, just not overly emotional. That is the way you are made. I am overly empathetic. Imagine if we were all one way or the other. OMG it would be chaos..lol There is a reason for the way you are and you do have a heart for the ones you love. I bet you may be headed for a career as a manager or leader of some kind. I don't know. But yours is a good personality trait for those kinds of fields and many more. Best of kindness to you and Cheers... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_Only Posted September 16, 2011 #4 Share Posted September 16, 2011 Dear Friend, I spent a great deal of my career as a registered nurse and worked with a lot of people. here is a story that might help you some. I worked with a cardiac surgeon and my peers called him Dr D.Head. Well he had possibly the worst bedside manner of any Dr I ever knew. He was direct, short tempered, demanded strait answers, showed no verbal compassion, etc. And he was the same with staff, demanded excellence and rewarded "slackers" with quick discipline. I saw a nurse jump him for being "rude and abrupt" with a patients family. He replied "Madam, I am not here to coddle them, I am here to save their lives." And walked away. Well, I want to say this about him. He was and still is the best cardiac surgeon I have ever known. He is loving and protective with his wife and children. He is charitable and away from work I have seen him smile and cut up and get on a bender or two with friends and colleagues. No, I doubt you will ever see him cry at a movie or swoon over pictures of little kitties or puppies, but I would trust my life to him. I guess what I am saying is that we are all wired different and it needs to be that way. You are most likely fine, just not overly emotional. That is the way you are made. I am overly empathetic. Imagine if we were all one way or the other. OMG it would be chaos..lol There is a reason for the way you are and you do have a heart for the ones you love. I bet you may be headed for a career as a manager or leader of some kind. I don't know. But yours is a good personality trait for those kinds of fields and many more. Best of kindness to you and Cheers... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jayferg76 Posted September 16, 2011 #5 Share Posted September 16, 2011 Don't beat yourself up about it. I'm exactly the same as you. If it doesn't involve my wife or kids, then i don't feel emotional, even if it involves my parents, friends etc. It's not that i'm a bad person, it's just the way i am. But you can guarantee one thing; when something bad does happen (when my grandfather died for example), everybody knows that i'm the one who sorts things out, and i'm the one to hold things together for them; and let me tell you, people really do appreciate that in their time of need and grief. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portraitartist Posted September 16, 2011 #6 Share Posted September 16, 2011 I don't know who that is, I assume he a doctor with a terrible bedside manner... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmpleFyre Posted September 16, 2011 #7 Share Posted September 16, 2011 (edited) I'm exactly like this as well. However, I wasn't raised to be like that. I just am despite what my mother tried to instill to me. There are four different kinds of ways people feel each others emotions: You're an empathetic person. That just means you can only relate to it if you can understand it. It's not a bad thing, it's just that most people aren't like this. You'd be sympathetic if you felt sorry for every time you heard something bad happened to someone(Like your friends you describe). Most people are like this. That's not bad either, it just makes more of a strain on your own mind to do so. You would be apathetic if you didn't care for anyone, or only for yourself. This is the really bad one. People who have and/or abuse power are usually are like this. And you would be pathetic if you took the time to stop and think of all the bad things going on in the world all the time. While not as bad as apathy, it's certainly not doing you or the world any good to sit there and cry about everything horrible in the world. Very few people are like this. Just my two cents, hope it helps! EDIT: Minor errors. Edited September 16, 2011 by DeltaEcho Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_Only Posted September 16, 2011 #8 Share Posted September 16, 2011 I don't know who that is, I assume he a doctor with a terrible bedside manner... Dr. Cox from Scrubs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portraitartist Posted September 16, 2011 #9 Share Posted September 16, 2011 Dr. Cox from Scrubs. OK, I think a lot of my friends used to watch this. I am more of a movie, news and survivor watcher. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philomath Posted September 16, 2011 #10 Share Posted September 16, 2011 Dear Friend, I spent a great deal of my career as a registered nurse and worked with a lot of people. here is a story that might help you some. I worked with a cardiac surgeon and my peers called him Dr D.Head. Well he had possibly the worst bedside manner of any Dr I ever knew. He was direct, short tempered, demanded strait answers, showed no verbal compassion, etc. And he was the same with staff, demanded excellence and rewarded "slackers" with quick discipline. I saw a nurse jump him for being "rude and abrupt" with a patients family. He replied "Madam, I am not here to coddle them, I am here to save their lives." And walked away. Well, I want to say this about him. He was and still is the best cardiac surgeon I have ever known. He is loving and protective with his wife and children. He is charitable and away from work I have seen him smile and cut up and get on a bender or two with friends and colleagues. No, I doubt you will ever see him cry at a movie or swoon over pictures of little kitties or puppies, but I would trust my life to him. I guess what I am saying is that we are all wired different and it needs to be that way. You are most likely fine, just not overly emotional. That is the way you are made. I am overly empathetic. Imagine if we were all one way or the other. OMG it would be chaos..lol There is a reason for the way you are and you do have a heart for the ones you love. I bet you may be headed for a career as a manager or leader of some kind. I don't know. But yours is a good personality trait for those kinds of fields and many more. Best of kindness to you and Cheers... Ahhhh now theres a true Empath. See's the positive side. Shows empathy for a non Empath! j/k Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philomath Posted September 16, 2011 #11 Share Posted September 16, 2011 @The Banana Since Ive been reading about Empaths I am understanding that there are Empaths and non-Empaths, and of the Empaths there are different types of Empaths, but everybody cant be an Empath. The world would be in kaos. So do not fret and take your very important place in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trog Posted September 17, 2011 #12 Share Posted September 17, 2011 The numbers that make up our birth date (which we actually choose while still in spirit) determine how emotional or caring we are to each other , the numbers attributed to the letters in our name also play a major roll in reinforcing our birth date numbers . For instance , twins can have totally different personalities , but both have the same birth date and may've been born only seconds apart .... But before birth they influenced their parents (while still in spirit) as to the names they wanted which gives them their personality differences . And I know exactly what parents are now thinking , 'I chose the name for my children' , but you didn't , not really , you were influenced by the spirit of your children . Those born in the twenty first century aren't going to be as generous making donations to charitable organizations as those born in the twentieth century , because every single baby born in the twentieth century had a 9 in their date , fewer will be born with a 9 or multiple 9's in this century . But , more babies will be born with zeros (Spiritual Gifts) in their date than there were in the last century .... So the adults born from 2000 on will be less generous but more spiritually aware .... And the reason is no surprise , ''The age of Aquarius'' . At least that's what numerology teaches us , and I believe it . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portraitartist Posted September 17, 2011 #13 Share Posted September 17, 2011 Ahhhh now theres a true Empath. See's the positive side. Shows empathy for a non Empath! j/k LOL It's true Philo. You know it... Cheers.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portraitartist Posted September 17, 2011 #14 Share Posted September 17, 2011 The numbers that make up our birth date (which we actually choose while still in spirit) determine how emotional or caring we are to each other , the numbers attributed to the letters in our name also play a major roll in reinforcing our birth date numbers . For instance , twins can have totally different personalities , but both have the same birth date and may've been born only seconds apart .... But before birth they influenced their parents (while still in spirit) as to the names they wanted which gives them their personality differences . And I know exactly what parents are now thinking , 'I chose the name for my children' , but you didn't , not really , you were influenced by the spirit of your children . Those born in the twenty first century aren't going to be as generous making donations to charitable organizations as those born in the twentieth century , because every single baby born in the twentieth century had a 9 in their date , fewer will be born with a 9 or multiple 9's in this century . But , more babies will be born with zeros (Spiritual Gifts) in their date than there were in the last century .... So the adults born from 2000 on will be less generous but more spiritually aware .... And the reason is no surprise , ''The age of Aquarius'' . At least that's what numerology teaches us , and I believe it . I do so enjoy your posts Trog... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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