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Mark Dohle: It can sometimes be difficult to know what has a priority in ones life. I suppose we really 'know' what it is, yet if time is not taken to sort through all the ‘stuff’ piled over that ‘knowing’, then life can be spent in chasing after illusions that can lead only to frustration and even despair. There are sources that are only too happy to tell you what your priorities should be; how you should look, eat, read, think, wear, also what you need to do to achieve all of the above. This usually means spending monies, lots of it on things that in the end don’t matter in any meaningful way, in leading a good life or for that matter a happy one. So yes there is manipulation involved in all of this, without any kind of real care about the real nature, or needs of the person being led down one path or another.... usually one that leads nowhere. Since many of them or based on some kind of culture fantasy or another. Today I guess the biggie is that if you don’t look young, trim, perfect, then there is something wrong with you. Magazine covers are filled with these fantasies. Slim bodies, both male and female, posed in just the right light, skinned oiled, clothes so tight that they probably needed help in getting into them, no wrinkles in either clothing or skin; then presto, presented as the only normal way to look and be. The fruit of such nonsense can be seen in to what absurd lengths people will go in order to reach such an impossible ideal. I think how this is presented in a funny way in soap operas. A woman will get out of bed, her hair made up, her sleeping gown perfect, nothing out of place, yes perfect! Though there is often an element of truth mixed in there; the people are often miserable, though they look great in their misery.

Life can’t be embraced in its fullness, if the above is taken as somehow presenting something true and desirable. We age, our body’s change, so we are told that this is bad; so in accepting this, something important is rejected or put on the back burner. I don’t see why having grey hair or wrinkles is something to be ashamed of. Nor why an older person would want to look years younger. No one is fooled. So a ‘good’ presented is one based on the assumption that there is something wrong with looking ones age; so self rejection is at the heart of it all. Of course if people are looked upon as commodities, things, then I guess that is the way to go. Some people fall for this to such a degree that they look like manikins, something that should be in a store front window. Allowing others who don’t know them, or care for them, to tell them how they should look.

Years ago a song came out, a funny one, as well as wise. One of the quotes in the song is this: “It is not how you feel but how you look”. The song was very funny, kind of prophetic actually, as comedians often are, but the song ignored for the most part, seen only as something humorous. When in fact, humor can gently hold up a mirror, to show us a less than flattering reflection of the collective soul of our culture, one that is too busy to reflect on what is truly important.

Youth is for the young. Getting older is something that should be embraced celebrated, loved even, for that is after all reality, we age. Perhaps there is a reason for this, aging. Maybe life is set up so that as we get older we can have more time to seek more important pass times, more fulfilling and meaningful for that specific time of life. Yes we are slowly backed in corners as the years pile up, but for those with faith this should be an invitation to a deeper delving into the reality of their own inner life. A life of the spirit; which in the end allows one to remain young and vibrant, just not in the superficial way that our commodity driven culture presents it, that entails an element of self rejection. For joy makes one young, a letting go of fear allows acceptance of others to flower; for in the end, it is love that we are called to emulate, to see the true uniqueness of others, their true beauty that goes deeper than make up, or the perfect body.

Of course we all know this, I think we just allow the times we live in to form us, keeping us away from the deep inner richness that each person carries within. We should live out our true uniqueness not allowing others to tell us how we should be, think, look, or believe. As a Christian, I will have certain ideas what this means, so I don’t expect others to agree with me. Yet in the end, our hearts scream for meaning, truth and love; is this not grace, beckoning us all?

If our religion or philosophy of life does not lead into greater freedom and a lessening of fear, then perhaps something better should be sought. That ‘better’ might be a simple seeking to deepen ones understanding of the traditions inherited, to pass beyond perhaps a childish faith into one that is truly childlike.

Mark Dohle