Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly conjugate verbs! I feel so blessed! Oh, thank you again! I just want everyone to bow down before me and accept that even in my wildest hallucinations, I never would have frantically prayed that this could ever happen to me. And to the other super-amazing nominees, I want each of you to know how totally wonderful your crushing defeats makes me feel right now!
You know when they first told me I was nominated, I just had to take a Carnival Cruise and obsess about how generous my fans have been.
You know, there are so many people to thank! First off though, I want to thank the amazing people of UM, who looked deep within their Magic 8-Balls before giving me this fantastic award! Also, I want to thank my guru, for being such a powerful force in my loins. And to the People Under the Stairs, who taught me to take life by the fifth of bourbon. Saruman without you this would not of been possible, thankyou. And finally, to all the personal assistants I fired - I couldn't have done it without you!
This one is for you Daz.
Thank you Unexplained Mystreries, and good night!
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