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[Archived] Make up a lie about poster above


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#4936    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 06 December 2012 - 05:22 PM

My lamp takes offense to that Helen .My lamp wears the shades just because he's damn cool . It makes the lady skulls go,oooowwww....those shades really bring out your cheek bones ...

In other news  ,Helen belongs to a knitting circle .She keeps this a secret though,because her knitting skills suck . When she tries to make a glove ,it always ends up looking like a weird mitten ,with just one finger ,coming out right in the middle ^_^.


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#4937    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 06 December 2012 - 05:51 PM

Almost true. See picture below.


Simbi now wishes to join my knitting circle. We told you the last time you tried that you are not allowed to bring the actual body part, you have to take exact measures and work with a model. Damn it. Look what cat dragged in, look what Simbi dragged in... I don't want to look, I've seen it all, all except someone else to clean up after the cats.

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#4938    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 06 December 2012 - 06:00 PM

View PostHelen of Annoy, on 06 December 2012 - 05:51 PM, said:

Almost true. See picture below.


Simbi now wishes to join my knitting circle. We told you the last time you tried that you are not allowed to bring the actual body part, you have to take exact measures and work with a model. Damn it. Look what cat dragged in, look what Simbi dragged in... I don't want to look, I've seen it all, all except someone else to clean up after the cats.
We made those for rockstar friends,decades ago .Shhhhhh ....

Helen also cannot cook well.
When she tried to make pot pie ,she wasn't sure which kind of pot to use ,so she wrapped some corning ware in dough ,and sprinkled marijuana on top .
It was a disaster,until she realized she could sell it to the rastas .
She lost a lot of her corning ware that way though .


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#4939    OverSword

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Posted 06 December 2012 - 07:12 PM

Helen sent that sewing item in her post to Simbi for Christmas.  It fits perfectly, I wonder how Helen knew the correct size?


#4940    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 06 December 2012 - 07:54 PM

I’m very lucky guesser.

I made one for OverSword too. His cousin gave me the measure. I was almost finished when I talked to the other of his numerous cousins and had to start all over because it turned out the first cousin is cross-eyed and he doesn’t have two of them after all. It was easier to knit but still I was a bit disappointed. Like when they promise you a freak show and there's only your uncle in a drag, faking a bearded lady. Happened to OverSword once, only he didn't recognize his own uncle, because he never wore that short skirt around the house.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#4941    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 05:08 AM

Helen voted for Romney,and then knitted him one of her famous warmers ....in red white and blue .
He was so taken by it all ,he put it on to model it for her,in private .
He even saluted her,and did the happy warmer dance .

When he lost ,Helen mourned ,because he couldn't even  raise his sad little head ,let alone salute or dance .....

*flees*

Edited by Simbi Laveau, 07 December 2012 - 05:09 AM.

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#4942    Knight Of Shadows

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 01:48 PM

simbi stumbled down while fleeing and fell down off 50 steps stair however the doctor said luckily she landed on her head and no " further " damage was done

by the name of Allah the Gracious the Merciful
Say, "I seek refuge in the Lord of daybreak From the evil of that which He created
And from the evil of darkness when it settles And from the evil of the blowers in knots
And from the evil of an envier when he envies"
truthful was Allah The Most High And Great


#4943    Old Man Waffles

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:11 PM

Knight loves Miley Cyrus, and even has her name tattooed on his knuckles. :P


#4944    SpiritWriter

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:14 PM

Knight of shadows got a shadow girl pregnant. Her and the baby live in a midnight blue lake under a moon that is always full and a dark cloud that is shaped like a dragon. Kos hasn't visited for several months and the shadow girl is getting very pissed.

The letter kills but The Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3:6

Non-ambiguity and non-contradiction are one sided and thus unsuited to express the incomprehensible. -Jung

#4945    SpiritWriter

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:16 PM

Old man waffles is really Jim carry, and he's been waiting for someone to guess his identity... Now that I have he's going to send me a really corny personal message and an audio clip of himself snort laughing...

The letter kills but The Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3:6

Non-ambiguity and non-contradiction are one sided and thus unsuited to express the incomprehensible. -Jung

#4946    Old Man Waffles

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:29 PM

Spirit writer is a MAN! Yes, it's TRUE! And she has all the man parts to prove it! :P


#4947    ealdwita

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:37 PM

Waffles spent the first few years of her life in a cardboard box under Battersea Bridge!

"G a wyrd swa hio scel, ac gecnwan n gef!": "Fate goes ever as she shall, but know thine enemy!".

"I was born with a priceless gift - the ability to laugh at other peoples' troubles" - Dame Edna Everage

#4948    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:49 PM

And we would be so grateful if you left her there. But noooo, you had to take the devil spawn home and try to raise her like a girl.
Since we all know what you do on weekends, and what your perception of a “girl” is, we got what we got, a confused waffle. Still better than fused waffles, ew, but still, it’s all ealdwita’s fault.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.

#4949    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 04:55 PM

Helen is actually waffles teacher and master .
She's training waffles in the secret art of UM ninjitsu
No one knows this,but Helen is the true power behind Sarus throne .
He does Helens bidding ,and in turn ,she let's everyone think he's in charge .
She is training waffles to follow in her evil genius footsteps .

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#4950    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 07 December 2012 - 05:11 PM

It’s that obvious, huh? I’m so lucky I’m convincing denial specialist among other things.
Waffles just don’t get that part of the Art... Twitter generation, attention span of Cocker Spaniel and similar social concepts, what can you do, neither **** nor bring home, as we say over here.

Anyway, Simbi decided to cheer me up because I’m still haunted with Romney flop, so she’s *heavily censored truth*
I’ll go with the soft-core... she’s handcrafting me a little bobbing headed Romney figurine. His upper head will bob too, and the saluting arm. Just don’t forget to make a flexible elbow too or I’ll have to hide it in my box of politically uncorrect horrors.

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
Donnie Darko did nothing, but I had to mention him too.