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Capture The Flag


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#16    Bracket

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 05:39 AM

View Postthe1truebat, on 07 February 2011 - 05:24 AM, said:

Unfortunately, as you were walking smugly away, you failed to notice that you were entering the Thunder Dome. I simply waited for Mad Max to finish you off, then he brought the flag back to me.

Just as Mad Max is about to hand it to you, i offer him some gas and he gives it to me instead. We then jump into his car and drive away.

I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

*Note to self, need more henchman, good ones this time. Also, start auditions for new female lab assistant.

#17    Donnie Darko

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 05:56 AM

Only there's a bomb inside the car and it auto locks you both inside. The window goes down, but only about halfway - making it easy for me to take it from you. Wearing my black sunglasses, with the flag in my hand, I walk away slowly as the car explodes into pieces....


#18    Delovely5150

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 06:05 AM

I sped by with my motorbike and grabbed the flag from Ozzy in a flash! I left him wondering where I suddenly came from.... lol.

A window within the soul to see, light and magick I send with thee.
Be strong, be brave, make the right choice, though darkness shouts with a terrible voice.
Know that I'm watching from above and that always, always, the answer is love.

#19    the1truebat

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 07:43 AM

DeLovley, giggling and looking over shoulder, completely misses the obviously painted fake tunnel and slams into a giant rock. Throwing a quick prayer of thanks to Wily E. Coyote I remove the flag from her person and once again, run like hell.

I am the guy with the stick.

#20    Bracket

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 09:33 AM

View Postthe1truebat, on 07 February 2011 - 07:43 AM, said:

DeLovley, giggling and looking over shoulder, completely misses the obviously painted fake tunnel and slams into a giant rock. Throwing a quick prayer of thanks to Wily E. Coyote I remove the flag from her person and once again, run like hell.

It is at that moment that i sick my army of mutant chickens on you. Between the constant pecking and shrieks of pain, i grab the flag.

I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

*Note to self, need more henchman, good ones this time. Also, start auditions for new female lab assistant.

#21    glyndowers heir

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 05:08 PM

View PostBracket, on 07 February 2011 - 09:33 AM, said:

It is at that moment that i sick my army of mutant chickens on you. Between the constant pecking and shrieks of pain, i grab the flag.

calling on my legion of 'Col Sanders' Trained Ninjas, they set about your mutant chickens :ph34r:

Strolling away with the flag, munching an unfeasibly large 'family Bucket', I ponder on the futility of it all :innocent:

(PS I wonder if some talented person could turn this thread into a flash animation for us to enjoy?)

Edited by glyndowers heir, 07 February 2011 - 05:11 PM.

Some people are like Slinkys ™! -
they don't do much good when they sit around ,
but they bring a smile to your face when you push them down stairs


#22    Mistydawn

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 05:56 PM

View Postglyndowers heir, on 07 February 2011 - 05:08 PM, said:

calling on my legion of 'Col Sanders' Trained Ninjas, they set about your mutant chickens :ph34r:

Strolling away with the flag, munching an unfeasibly large 'family Bucket', I ponder on the futility of it all :innocent:

(PS I wonder if some talented person could turn this thread into a flash animation for us to enjoy?)


I land on your head, shot from a rocket fired by a coyote, give you a kiss and then run laughing hysterically with the flag... MINE!

Posted Image

#23    the1truebat

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 08:50 PM

I wait patiently for Mistydawn, as she runs by, I yank the cover off a giant diamond.
When the sunlight glints off it, her eyes get huge and her pupils dilate. While she stands there drooling and mumbling, "Ooh, shiny", I slip the flag from her hands and replace it with a cheap plastic knockoff. Once again, I run like hell.

I am the guy with the stick.

#24    Ghostfinder

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 09:24 PM

I jog up to you behind you on your left...I tap your right shoulder...when you look to your right, you are shocked to find no one is there?!?!?!  How could this be?  For you are sure you felt a distinct tap upon your right shoulder.  What could have caused it?  You are concerned you are losing your sanity.  

It is then you realize the brilliance of my plan.  I grabbed the flag while you were pondering the impossible.  To continue my ingenious, magician like performance...I disappear with the flag.


#25    Donnie Darko

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 10:26 PM

You dissapear into a grassy area where you throw yourself onto the ground, laughing, gloating over your devious performance. You look up to take a good look at the Flag..only...where is it?! How did this happen?!

**Whistles**


"Up here" Your speechless as you see me floating away inside a hot air balloon waving the flag .."I'VE GOT IT! Ahahahaha!!" :devil:


#26    glyndowers heir

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 10:46 PM

View PostOzzy Valentine, on 07 February 2011 - 10:26 PM, said:

You dissapear into a grassy area where you throw yourself onto the ground, laughing, gloating over your devious performance. You look up to take a good look at the Flag..only...where is it?! How did this happen?!

**Whistles**


"Up here" Your speechless as you see me floating away inside a hot air balloon waving the flag .."I'VE GOT IT! Ahahahaha!!" :devil:

I whistle tunelessly to myself as i assemble the giant crossbow kit i just bought.

I have to test it and what better target than this convenient hot air balloon?

oh look, its that flag again! i'd better take it for safe keeping! :innocent:  :lol:

Edited by glyndowers heir, 07 February 2011 - 10:48 PM.

Some people are like Slinkys ™! -
they don't do much good when they sit around ,
but they bring a smile to your face when you push them down stairs


#27    Ghostfinder

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 10:50 PM

Till I do my special call af the Kaklu.  What is a Kaklu you ask?  Ha...glad you asked.  It's a prehistoric flying badger that has laid dormant for thousands of years.  It likes warm weather, dark caves and surprisingly - peanut butter.  This is irrelevant to you, as all you know is what I call the Kaklu Kall...a screech that paralyzes you in the air balloon.  The Kaklu grabs the flag and drops it to me.  Just to be sure...I have it go back and gnaw a hole in the air balloon.  Have fun.

glyndowers beat me to it.  I don't feel like re-writing this...so glyndowers must have then got back in the hot air balloon to escape, then what I wrote above happened.  :)

Edited by Ghostfinder, 07 February 2011 - 10:56 PM.


#28    ships-cat

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 11:33 PM

Ozzy.. flushed with victory, and having EASILY dodged Glyndowers clumsy crossbow attempt (he really SHOULD have read the bit in the assembly manual about "don't assemble indoors") .. decides its silly to be IN a hot air balloon, and sensibly slides down the ropes into the passenger basket.

Uncorking a bottle of Vintage Champagne (Tesco's... December 2010... Wednesday), he settles back to admire the flag, and the fruits of victory, whistling a cheerful tune as he does so.

Gradually, he becomes aware that his whistled rendition of "By Dawns Early Light" has a counterpoint. A deep, bass, buzzing noise.

Ozzy initially disregarded this as a symptom of his premature Tinnitus: a result of the damage to his Tympanic Membrane occasioned during his teenage experiments with Aural Sex (in turn a consequence of his Dyslexia whilst briefly flicking through a copy of "Joy of Sex" by Alex Comfort in the Opticians waiting room).

But then a shadow is cast across the basket of the balloon, and Ozzy realises that the buzzing has an external source. He looks up to see the Sun eclipsed by a monstrous apparition. AN ORANGE ZEPPELIN !!!!!

The gentle, hypnotic drone of the Drazy Hoops turns into a turbine-powered PURRRRRRR as the Rotors Rotate to bring the Dirigible on a collision course with the helpless Ozzy.

At the last minute before collision, Ozzy realises that the Zeppelin is decorated as a large Shark. Possibly with lasers in its forehead. At the last minute, the "mouth" of the shark opens -  "Moonraker-Stylee" - and the hapless Ozzy - balloon and all - is drawn into the innards of the Diabolical Orange Device.

A team of Orange-Clad Ninja Surly Minions descend, and within minutes Ozzy is Disarmed, Debagged, De-Flagged and - in handcuffs - Detained for Debriefing in Disarray. The Flag is carried away.

High on the Bridge of Her Majesties Dirigible "Tunafish", Ships Cat looks on in satisfaction as the flag is duly packed away into a crate, and the crate nailed shut. And sealed. A Minion stamps a picture of a Fish on the side, along with an unfeasably long serial number.

the end of the story , you may think ? Ships Cat has the flag, after all.

But as the end-credits roll, we see the Dirigible "Tunafish" high above a seemingly endless jungle.. a crate being lowered by hoist to the ground, and into the metalic grasp of a fork-lift truck.

the Fork-lift approaches a small building with HUGE steel blast-doors... surely invisible from the air ? The doors open to reveal an elevator, into which the fork-lift - and our En-crated flag - drives.

With a powerful whine of hydraulics, the elevator plunges downward... and downward.. and downward. Finally, the doors open to reveal a VAST warehouse... with shelf after shelf of racking stretching 50' high.. and forwards as far as the dim light can see.

The fork lift powers forward purposely towards the vanishing point, carrying our En-crated flag down the long aisle, obviously with a sense of destination. Somewhere on these shelves, is a gap to put our encrated flag in.

Next to uncounted thousands of similar crates.

All with a picture of a flag.. and a LONG serial number.

High above the styxian storage cavern, the Dirigible "Tunafish" guns its engines, and rises into the sky. It is obviously in haste... its crew given new instructions, new destinations.

Ships Cat has retired from the Bridge, and is in his quarters. He surveys the latest Flag report, and the instructions for the NEXT one, and ponders....

"when will they EVER learn" ?

Meow Purr :)

A cat stretches from one end of my childhood to the other.

#29    Donnie Darko

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Posted 08 February 2011 - 02:27 AM

:o


#30    the1truebat

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Posted 08 February 2011 - 03:25 AM

Looks like we's headed to the jungle, Ozzy.

I am the guy with the stick.




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