Well, first of all thanks to everyone who took an interest and had kind words to say. There was one person who really took the time and kept in contact with me almost every day and it meant the world.
My last post in this topic was 5 months ago. On March 9th my wife (we are not divorced as of yet) and son flew to Florida and a week later moved to Texas for good. For about four months I lost my mind only being able to speak with him a few times a week. I fell on hard times and ended up losing not only them but my home as well. I packed my car with camping gear and planned to head into the woods to live. There was an intervention of sorts and I was persuaded to move in with my mother and step-father. Through those months I lost myself and all hope. I went from having a wife, child, job, a home, and a future to having nothing. A 31 year old, alone.
However, I have an update for the few of you who cared and/or care. About a month and a half ago I spoke with my ex who informed me that she noticed our son being very unhappy. He wanted to come to live with me. She told me that she'd like to try it because his happiness was most important thing to her. About a month ago he (as well as her) flew up from Texas to New Hampshire. We shared visiting time with him and then she left. I didn't see her while she was here and that was hard for me, but my boy stayed. He now lives with myself and my parents. I have him enrolled in school and he is doing so well. I admit that I'm very nervous being a single father, but he's home. There was no lawyer, no need to involve the state or make things turn into war. His wishes were seen to and she get's alot of my respect for that. So, that's the update. Life is starting over.
2
1 votes
Divorce, loss, and starting over.
Sorry such a heavy topic!
Started by Guest_Untitled__* , Feb 02 2012 05:40 PM
Started by Guest_Untitled__* , Feb 02 2012 05:40 PM
65 replies to this topic
#61
Guest_J.P._*
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Posted 09 August 2012 - 03:01 AM
#62
THE MATRIX
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Posted 09 August 2012 - 03:34 AM
J.P., on 02 February 2012 - 05:40 PM, said:
Right now I'm at the start of a complicated divorce. We were married like 9 years and together about 13. High school sweethearts. Things have been rough for years but when she told me it was "really over", I couldn't believe it. Now she acts as if we are enemys. I left the appartment, lost my job, left my car (for her to use for now). Any advice? Been through it?
You're a free man now. No longer hooked up to the ball and chain. Forget her. Now you can go and live your life the way you want. You can go and score with a different girl every night.
#63
HeartsAreForBreaking
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Don't trust too much, don't need too much, don't Love too much. Because that too much will hurt you so much.
Posted 11 August 2012 - 10:15 PM
Man I'm sorry, I mean I grew up around a lot of divorce, and I know it sucks for everyone involved 99 percent of the time. I think even in divorce some rules of marriage still apply in a sense, like pick your battles. For one thing I agree with Becky's Mom, divorce and life in general are both easier if you can at least work with the people you have to without too much friction. That being said, the more you can work 'with' someone rather than against or around them, the better. There's no one size fits 'em all or easy solution for this, but try to stay happy and healthy I guess. Walking has probably saved my life 10 times over; it's not just good for your physical health, you know? Try getting your blood pumping and take a 15 minute walk somewhere where you can look around and let your mind wander onto things besides this current situation, and if you want to make friends, maybe find a hobbie or start trying something new and if you like it and stick with it long enough, you've found a new interest and chances are you'll eventually run into someone else who shares your enthusiasm for whatever it is you've chosen. I'm sorry, again, that you lost your job, I know employment worries can be among the worst stresses in life at times. I'm pretty sure I'd have to agree with another poster that the car might be an issue to discuss with your wife and attend to, but legally I'm not entirely sure what to say. All in all just be good to yourself and try and keep in mind that probably no one is having a walk in the park with this. I don't want to diverge too much, but I was with someone for almost 5 years of my life and from the day we decided to leave each other and move on it took about a month for him to get all of his stuff and completely move out, and seeing each other almost every day like that was really difficult, but I think one of the biggest things that helped us salvage our friendship through everything was being sympathetic of each other as much as we could. Best of luck to you, your ex-wife, and your son, I guess sometimes things just work out for the best whether we know it or not.
American with an accent, Christian with a tat, sociopath with a heart, child with no mother, Lover with no Lover, confidently doubting, amused but not laughing, woman but child, feisty yet caring, sweet when not bitter.
#64
Guest_J.P._*
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Posted 11 August 2012 - 11:30 PM
ScreamingSarcasm, on 11 August 2012 - 10:15 PM, said:
Man I'm sorry, I mean I grew up around a lot of divorce, and I know it sucks for everyone involved 99 percent of the time. I think even in divorce some rules of marriage still apply in a sense, like pick your battles. For one thing I agree with Becky's Mom, divorce and life in general are both easier if you can at least work with the people you have to without too much friction. That being said, the more you can work 'with' someone rather than against or around them, the better. There's no one size fits 'em all or easy solution for this, but try to stay happy and healthy I guess. Walking has probably saved my life 10 times over; it's not just good for your physical health, you know? Try getting your blood pumping and take a 15 minute walk somewhere where you can look around and let your mind wander onto things besides this current situation, and if you want to make friends, maybe find a hobbie or start trying something new and if you like it and stick with it long enough, you've found a new interest and chances are you'll eventually run into someone else who shares your enthusiasm for whatever it is you've chosen. I'm sorry, again, that you lost your job, I know employment worries can be among the worst stresses in life at times. I'm pretty sure I'd have to agree with another poster that the car might be an issue to discuss with your wife and attend to, but legally I'm not entirely sure what to say. All in all just be good to yourself and try and keep in mind that probably no one is having a walk in the park with this. I don't want to diverge too much, but I was with someone for almost 5 years of my life and from the day we decided to leave each other and move on it took about a month for him to get all of his stuff and completely move out, and seeing each other almost every day like that was really difficult, but I think one of the biggest things that helped us salvage our friendship through everything was being sympathetic of each other as much as we could. Best of luck to you, your ex-wife, and your son, I guess sometimes things just work out for the best whether we know it or not.
#65
moosehead
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IS there happiness out there for me?
Posted 31 August 2012 - 09:54 AM
I too am going thru this. Also trying to prepare to move out of state. Its been rough and still is. Like a death. Part of you is gone. But as they say time will heal. Someday that person will only be a distant memory. Hope we both get thru it. 
Happiness illudes me. Each day is a struggle.
#66
LEGIONS
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We never know how we look ,til we get our picture took
Posted 07 October 2012 - 01:21 PM
It would appear that marriage is the leading cause of DIVORCE
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