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{un}holy haiku (Part 2)


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#91    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 05:00 PM

gentle slap of sheets
ghosts of children don’t grow up
sadness turns to rage

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
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#92    Madeline

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 05:01 PM

gentle slap of sheets
until the wind blows
and they're turned to shreds

In your lifetime, try to be the person your pet thinks you are.
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened.


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#93    orangepeaceful79

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 06:15 PM

View PostMadeline, on 03 June 2012 - 05:01 PM, said:

gentle slap of sheets
until the wind blows
and they're turned to shreds
Hey Madeline :)  Just a bit of haiku lesson for you.  The first line is 5 syllables, the second line must be 7 syllables, and the third line is 5 syllables again.  Otherwise you aren't writing haiku and it doesn't technically belong in this thread.

I just happened to notice most of yours are 5, 5, 5.......it was driving some part of my brain nuts......hope I don't offend.

Edited by orangepeaceful79, 03 June 2012 - 06:19 PM.


#94    orangepeaceful79

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 06:54 PM

Hope I don't offend
Just want to write silly poems
and enjoy format

:)


#95    _Only

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 07:34 PM

and enjoy format,
but keep it free
as the path of air

I also don't mean to offend anyone.


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#96    Madeline

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Posted 03 June 2012 - 08:09 PM

View Post_Only, on 03 June 2012 - 07:34 PM, said:

and enjoy format,
but keep it free
as the path of air

I also don't mean to offend anyone.

as the path of air
has gone to the mountain
so must I go too


(Sorry, I will put more thought into it)   Now you'all can stop gritting your teeth :st
I'm not offended, I like to learn :tsu:

In your lifetime, try to be the person your pet thinks you are.
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened.


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#97    joc

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 03:21 AM

so I must go too
as those who have gone before
Wait, I think I'll stay

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once i believed that starlight could guide me home
now i know that light is old and stars are cold

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#98    Helen of Annoy

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 03:19 PM

Wait, I think I’ll stay
to annoy or to amuse
which me you want, choose

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The 5 millionth post was Junior Chubb's fault :D
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#99    ouija ouija

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 04:05 PM

which me you want, choose
I am flexible and cool
I go with the flow

Life is all too much ............................................. and not enough.

It is only when you form your question precisely and accurately that you receive the true answer.

#100    _Only

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 04:11 PM

I go with the flow
bobbing and dipping under
the water is harsh

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#101    ouija ouija

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 04:20 PM

the water is harsh
but I am harsher still, see
swim further from me

Life is all too much ............................................. and not enough.

It is only when you form your question precisely and accurately that you receive the true answer.

#102    sarah_444

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 04:52 PM

swim further from me
satly ocean waves pushing
holding on no more


#103    Left-Field

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 05:13 PM

Holding on no more
Not an easy thing to do
But one must be fair


#104    Madeline

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 06:04 PM

But one must be fair
and always remember to
do unto others

In your lifetime, try to be the person your pet thinks you are.
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened.


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#105    joc

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Posted 05 June 2012 - 02:00 AM

do unto others
show all mercy frequently
my reality

Posted Image
once i believed that starlight could guide me home
now i know that light is old and stars are cold

ReverbNation




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