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Dear Dr Eldorado!


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#1    Eldorado

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 06:23 PM

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Dr Eldorado! Your UM problem solver.
A problem shared is a problem laughed at!
(Do not use the forum to request or provide help with medical conditions or medications, you are always best to seek the advice of your doctor.)

Got Something Bugging You? Ask Dr Eldorado, PHD ( Pretty Handsome Dude)!

Dear Dr El
Last week my girlfriend told me that she’s been probed by aliens. Should I worry about this? -- Joe

Sadly, Joe you should. There’s no telling what the probe was, who did the probing and why. Girls tend to be a wee bit untruthful in this regard so I’d advise dumping her.

Dear Dr El
My dog talks to me. -- Sid

Dear Sid, as long as you never follow it’s advice, you’ll be fine.

Dear Dr El
With the approaching Doomsday should I abandon my 9 to 5 life and live out my fantasies? -- Mildred

Mildred, my dear. Don’t be silly.

Dear Dr El
I’m worried sick about Jack the Ripper. What can we do? -- Nathanial

Well, Nat I’d advise you give up your career as an East London prostitute. As for the rest of us, I think we’ll be safe.

Dear Dr El
Is there any truth in the rumour that a great number of highly intelligent people are sometimes cursed with being rude, offensive and obnoxious? -- Salty the Seal

That’s a hard one, Salty. I’d say, yes.

Dear Dr El
I’ve been dating a zombie for 6 days and 3 hours now, El and he hasn’t even nibbled my ear. What’s the deal? -- Stacey

He’s quite obviously gay, Stacey-pie. Dump him.  You're too good for him anyway.
 
Need A Short Answer To A Short Question? Ask Dr Eldorado!

Edited by Eldorado, 24 June 2012 - 06:34 PM.


#2    Q-C

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 06:40 PM

Dear Dr El

I'm tired of only getting to go out with my boyfriend Vladimir at night? Any advice?

Bigfoot is in the eye of the beholder

Scottish Scientists Only!

#3    Eldorado

Eldorado

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 06:48 PM

View PostQuiteContrary, on 24 June 2012 - 06:40 PM, said:

Dear Dr El

I'm tired of only getting to go out with my boyfriend Vladimir at night? Any advice?

You should run away with Vladimir, imo.  Money matters not a jot when you have love and each other.


#4    JonathanVonErich

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 07:54 PM

I have a question for you, Dr. El

Can I see proof that you are indeed a real doctor ?? A diploma or something ?? Hmmmmmm ?? :D

:P


#5    Star of the Sea

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 08:06 PM

Dear Dr. El,

When are you going to publish a book? You have so many fans now :clap:

Edited by Star of the Sea, 24 June 2012 - 08:08 PM.

"Love one another as I have loved you" John 15:9-17

#6    Knight Of Shadows

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 08:11 PM

Dr  El there is this girl i really like .. and there is that girl i also really like
and between these two my heart is torn because between them there's also this girl that is so adoreable
on the other hand her friend is soo cute .. but her sister .. ohh man beyond word
what do i do ? not about all the ones above but about this new girl i know :D

"why should we not rely on Allah when he guided us our path . we shall certainly bear with patience all the hurt you may cause us. for those who want to put their trust in someone should put their trust in Allah.


#7    Wordless Wanderer

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 08:13 PM

Dear Dr. El,

Where can I get your autograph?

Posted Image

#8    Knight Of Shadows

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 08:17 PM

View PostWordless Wanderer, on 24 June 2012 - 08:13 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El,

Where can I get your autograph?
ohh if i was Dr.El  . i'd know the answer to that reall well " smirks big time " :D

"why should we not rely on Allah when he guided us our path . we shall certainly bear with patience all the hurt you may cause us. for those who want to put their trust in someone should put their trust in Allah.


#9    Lcvec

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 09:10 PM

Dear Dr. El

I don't know what to do with my life. Should I start wearing pink clothes?


#10    Knight Of Shadows

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 11:09 AM

View PostLcvec, on 24 June 2012 - 09:10 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El

I don't know what to do with my life. Should I start wearing pink clothes?
am sorry am Dr.El's assistant he's busy at the moment he went to his shrink .. he'll be back soon please wait in the hall

"why should we not rely on Allah when he guided us our path . we shall certainly bear with patience all the hurt you may cause us. for those who want to put their trust in someone should put their trust in Allah.


#11    Eldorado

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 12:42 PM

View PostQuiteContrary, on 24 June 2012 - 06:40 PM, said:

Dear Dr El

I'm tired of only getting to go out with my boyfriend Vladimir at night? Any advice?

On the advice of lawyers, QC (lol) I change my original advice in case you are under-18 and do indeed elope with Vladimir.  Plus, I'd feel guilty if he impaled you without your consent.

You should therefore, imo cherish having someone to love and stop being so greedy.  No offence.


#12    Eldorado

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 12:44 PM

View PostJonathanVonErich, on 24 June 2012 - 07:54 PM, said:

I have a question for you, Dr. El

Can I see proof that you are indeed a real doctor ?? A diploma or something ?? Hmmmmmm ?? :D

:P

Diploma? I have no diploma. I don't need no steenking diploma!

:gun:


#13    Eldorado

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 12:46 PM

View PostStar of the Sea, on 24 June 2012 - 08:06 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El,

When are you going to publish a book? You have so many fans now :clap:

In time for Christmas, Star.  In time for Christmas.  *puffs on cigar*

:santa:


#14    Eldorado

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 12:51 PM

View PostKnight Of Shadows, on 24 June 2012 - 08:11 PM, said:

Dr  El there is this girl i really like .. and there is that girl i also really like
and between these two my heart is torn because between them there's also this girl that is so adoreable
on the other hand her friend is soo cute .. but her sister .. ohh man beyond word
what do i do ? not about all the ones above but about this new girl i know :D

It would appear, Knight that you are confusing your heart & mind with your loins.  A common error among the Young Jedi which usually leads to torn underpants, not a torn heart.

Toss a coin.

View PostWordless Wanderer, on 24 June 2012 - 08:13 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El,

Where can I get your autograph?

You can't.


#15    Eldorado

Eldorado

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 12:52 PM

View PostLcvec, on 24 June 2012 - 09:10 PM, said:

Dear Dr. El

I don't know what to do with my life. Should I start wearing pink clothes?

Only if you want to look like a girl, Lcvec.





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