Hello Reality and all that is True
When Oxymoron was defined it was just for you
Posted 27 October 2012 - 09:48 AM
There's been some personal attacks, bickering and pretty base language in the last couple of pages,
I have cleaned most of this up.
Please remain on topic and discuss the issue in a civil manner.
"I warn you, whoever you are, oh you who wish to probe the arcanes of nature, if you do not find within yourself that which you seek, neither shall you find it outside.
If you ignore the excellencies of your own house, how do you intend to find other excellencies?
In you is hidden the treasure of treasures, Oh man, know thyself and you shall know the Universe and the Gods."
Just to follow through with a quick update on the situation about this guy (my object of affection). He never did call, but I have managed to get a little closer to him. He at least speaks to me now and doesn't act aggravated or annoyed but actually smiles and is quite warm even from his distance. I peep that he is much like myself: he's not necessarily shy but more than likely has a lot of trust issues and takes a while to warm up to strangers. I think he is kinda scared, has been curious about being with the same sex, but is scared, confused, and ashamed of it. I have been all of these things, which is why I pretty much know it when I see it. I think he cares a lot about image. So all in all, he probably has a lot of walls up that are going to take some time to break through. Any guy who wants to get at him is just going to be a patient and caring guy. I won't say I'm the man for the job, but I am at least going to give it a try, as he has virtually forced me to break out of my own box!
I have managed to have a conversation with him, find out his hobbies and things about his life. The other day, I happened to wind up on the same lunch break as him, so before he clocked out I asked him if he was going to get something to eat... I rode to McDonald's with him (I already had my lunch, I just wanted a chance to talk to him, of course). Although we don't have the same hobbies/interests in common, personality wise we are actually very much alike. He's also a church boy who's never drank or smoked anything... We stopped at the gas station and I pumped his gas while he went in to pay. It was a very small, seemingly insignificant gesture, of course, but i guess I'm going to keep doing little things like telling him to be careful on the road, maybe throw a snack his way or something, just little things to let him know that I care about him, until he warms up more and we possibly graduate to bigger things. I'm not getting my hopes up too high but just trying to stay positive. I did manage to get his number but I'm waiting for the right time to call him.
So, I texted him today today for the first time (during the convo I was having a borderline panic attack!---actually had to lie down), and this is the conversation verbatim:
ME: "Hey, did you make it home safe???" (he had a problem starting his car as we were leaving work today)
HIM: "Yea I did, thanks bro did you?"
ME: "That's good! Yessir I did. Thank you"
ME: "Is it ok if I holler at you at some point? I dont really get a chance2 speak 2U at work. But doesnt have2 be now. I mean when you get the chance?"
HIM: "Yea its cool"
ME: "Just let me know when ok"
Do you think he knows what I want to speak to him about? Do you think I should tell him how I feel, even though we're technically not even friends yet? I have been trying to be patient and take the "friends first, even if nothing else becomes of it" route, as not to scare him off. But this is really driving me crazy. I think about him 24/7 (between going on with normal life and thinking and doing other things of course). But I feel the need to get this off of my chest once and for all. What should I say??