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Personal Opinion: Daughter's Hair


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#16    PlanB

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 06:52 PM

I believe the solution is a sweet mullet.


#17    RockabyeBillie

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 06:55 PM

View PostPlanB, on 23 January 2013 - 06:52 PM, said:

I believe the solution is a sweet mullet.

a mullet mohawk combo!

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#18    Ealdwita

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 08:39 PM

View PostPlanB, on 23 January 2013 - 06:52 PM, said:

I believe the solution is a sweet mullet.

I'd prefer a sweet n' sour haddock, if you don't mind!   Posted Image

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#19    Q-C

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 09:21 PM

I agree with everyone who has said, if you are the one caring for it, why not make it easy?
Same happens with dressing little ones.
I dressed my kids in easy to remove clothing when they were little. And then whenever they were able to tackle closures and get to the bathroom okay, they certainly had a say in what they wore, if they cared.
Yeah for sweats and onesies!!!!

When little, my mom used to keep my hair cut off and give me a permanent (pixie style, I think it was called). I HATED those perms. The old nasty smelly kitchen sink home perms...uuuugh!
Once I was allowed to let it grow I had hair like yours too, Rockabye. Always long and thick. My mom always hated it long. I think I grew it just to get back at her for the nasty perms. :devil:

Now that I'm older I rebel again with long white/gray hair, just because people say I shouldn't have long hair, especially not long white/gray hair at my age. :devil:
My mom still tells me to get my hair cut!


When I look at the new thread with the horses with the 19-foot manes I feel sorry for them! Sooo heavy on their necks, messy, dirty, impractical...

Edited by QuiteContrary, 23 January 2013 - 09:24 PM.

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#20    Ryu

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Posted 23 January 2013 - 09:27 PM

It is sad how, in some families, hair is such an issue.
I would find it almost insane to force a child to wear long hair and never let them cut it until they are eighteen.
Long hair can be a real pain in the petunia for some.

If the child (regardless of gender) likes it short then so be it...if long (within reason) then so be it.
But sadly some people have thick hair so having it long can be a problem but if it is too long then you can break your neck getting tripped up in it.

Imagine..death by hair! How gruesome.


#21    RockabyeBillie

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:09 AM

View PostRyu, on 23 January 2013 - 09:27 PM, said:

It is sad how, in some families, hair is such an issue.
I would find it almost insane to force a child to wear long hair and never let them cut it until they are eighteen.
Long hair can be a real pain in the petunia for some.

If the child (regardless of gender) likes it short then so be it...if long (within reason) then so be it.
But sadly some people have thick hair so having it long can be a problem but if it is too long then you can break your neck getting tripped up in it.

Imagine..death by hair! How gruesome.

Yeah, like I said, mine got so long that I would sit on it when I sat down. Pain in the butt! When I got it cut my mom kept it...

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#22    Michelle

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:31 AM

I've almost always had long hair, but I had two sisters that treated me like their own personal doll...dressing me and fixing my hair. It's so thick and curly it's easier to braid it without having to worry about drying and styling it. When I want a dramatic look I can still wear it down, but it is a pain in the buttocks. lol


#23    Miss Shadows

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 05:39 AM

This is just my take on things personally, but I think the OP is going about this in a way that will make the best out of a not so great situation. IMO, save your daughter a lot of pain and hassle, and when you feel she's ready, give her the space to grow by making her choices on the matter like she would with anyone else. As a kid I was always very independent and I've made almost all my own decisions for as long as I can remember, save when I lived with my 'father' for about a year, we often had a lot of people coming in and out of the house for important reasons, and I was expected to be a 'lady', which meant my father required I have hair past my shoulders and usually braided. This might be a bit different, but I started wearing brown color-adjusting contacts at a fairly young age, because whether it be my genes or whatever, my natural eye color used to draw a lot of attention and I didn't like it. My contacts are cheap, easy, and if they save me trouble why not. You don't have to have long hair to be a girl, and I think functionality should come before looks/societal misconceptions here. Just my opinion.

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#24    SpiritWriter

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 06:01 AM

View PostRockabyeBillie, on 23 January 2013 - 02:40 PM, said:

I said when (if) I have a daughter, I'm going to keep her hair short until she is old enough to take care of it herself - maybe 6 or 7 years old. If she wants to grow it out, it's her choice and her responsibility. If she wants to keep it short, that's fine too. Her choice.

I have my reasons for this. As a child, I was never allowed to cut my hair and it grew down past my butt. Genetically, we have really thick hair, and I mean THICK. When in a ponytail, it poofed out like a witch's broom. I couldn't manage it.

It used to take half an hour to wash, an hour to brush (and it was so painful, I hated it, used to make me cry) and another hour to blow dry. And at school, it would get wrapped around the screws in the seat of my desk and get yanked out in chunks.

I was miserable, but I was still not allowed to cut it until I turned 18. Even if I could have cut it shoulder length, that would have been acceptable to me. But nope.

Tried explaining this to my sister but she thinks I'm terrible for it. I tried telling her how miserable I was with long hair and I will give my daughter the CHOICE once she is old enough to make that decision for herself, but she says it's weird for a little girl to have short hair. I argued that a girl doesn't have to have long hair just because she is a girl.

Anyway... I disagree with her. I think allowing my child to make that decision on her own will be good for her overall.

So what do you guys think?

Sounds like you know what you want to do.. there are cute cuts for girls.. you dont have to listen to your sister. You can even keep her hair just a little past her shoulders. That way it'll still be longer than short, still considered long by some's standards and be easier to manage. I bet if you keep it real short, she'll want it long when she's older lol..you will be the mother.. Your choice!

I took a class on foster care once and these are the things your not aloud to do as a foster parent (as apposed to a natural parent): spank or hit, try to change the childs religion, or cut the childs hair (besides trims) into a different style without permission. Says a lot about the importance of your right as a mother to choose.

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#25    SpiritWriter

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 06:07 AM

View PostRyu, on 23 January 2013 - 09:27 PM, said:

It is sad how, in some families, hair is such an issue.
I would find it almost insane to force a child to wear long hair and never let them cut it until they are eighteen.
Long hair can be a real pain in the petunia for some.

If the child (regardless of gender) likes it short then so be it...if long (within reason) then so be it.
But sadly some people have thick hair so having it long can be a problem but if it is too long then you can break your neck getting tripped up in it.

Imagine..death by hair! How gruesome.

My long hair got wrapped into a paper folding machine once and I thought it was going to get ripped of my scalp. Luckily I thought fast and flipped the switch on the machine. I had to pull it out of the rollers. It literally sucked my hair up so fast my head whipped right up to the machine. It was very scary. Yes hair can be dangerous!

The letter kills but The Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3:6

Non-ambiguity and non-contradiction are one sided and thus unsuited to express the incomprehensible. -Jung

#26    SpiritWriter

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 06:10 AM

Rockabye.. you'll win the arguement... she'll just be the auntie. Tell her to buy her a headband with a bow on it instead of ponytail holders lol

The letter kills but The Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3:6

Non-ambiguity and non-contradiction are one sided and thus unsuited to express the incomprehensible. -Jung

#27    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 08:00 AM

View PostlibstaK, on 23 January 2013 - 02:55 PM, said:

I had the exact opposite problem.  I had my hair always cut to shoulder length till about the age of 3, then I had it cropped very short and cut often as my European parents believed that the more often you cut it the thicker and healthier it would grow as I grew older.  I hated the short hair and fought them over it for years, finally was allowed a bob hair cut by about the age of nine which was a relief and then started to grow it long in my teens (finally).  I think kids always see the grass greener on the other side.  I hated knots in my hair even as a teen and if I was honest in hindsight I probably would have hated looking after long hair every day but I felt resentful for their choice and reasons for a lot of years.

Strangely (and I do believe their belief was an old wives tale most of the time) I have fine hair but alot of it, it looks quite thick and hairdressers are surprised at how fine the strands are by comparison, hmmm.

I had this too,except my mom liked the bob cut . I had bob cuts until I was 16,and I told her to leave my calm hair alone .
I resented it ,and have kept my hair long ever since.
I would say let her have it just past her ears ,and as soon as she understands,let her decide ,or she will not appreciate being forced one way or another.
If she wants it long ,she will want to wash it and groom it ,if not,let her cut it .

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#28    Tia

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 02:10 PM

I have 2 daughters the eldest has the thickest hair you've ever seen and the youngest fine hair. One curly the other waves.

This is just my opinion, it's nice to see girls with a little bit of length so shoulder length when little is good. Once they start pre-school you'll want hair that can be tied up nice and high as nits are rampant from here till the last 2 years of primary school and they always go for clean hair. If your daughter has thick hair ( both my girls had nits once) you'll be spending 2 hours every day for 1 to 2 weeks combing and checking for new outbreaks, not a pleasant experience with a young screaming child.

Also at 7 or 8 an average child isn't capable of looking after long hair properly. You'll still need to go over it with detangling spray and brushing daily. Plus some still need help tying their hair back or if it's a fancy style they want, you'll be doing it. My 11 year old still won't take care of her hair even with threats of getting it cut short, everyone else has to brush it, put it up and I give it a really good shampoo once a week. I think the rest of the time she just sticks her head under the shower. :no:

Also by about 10 you'll be getting into discussions of colour and stuff, my 11 year old is currently sporting a hot pink chunk. Luckily with all the swimming she's doing it's fades quickly to a pretty pale pink. Her hair is about mid to lower shoulder blade length and that's as far as I'll let her have it.

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#29    RockabyeBillie

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 02:20 PM

View PostTia, on 24 January 2013 - 02:10 PM, said:

I have 2 daughters the eldest has the thickest hair you've ever seen and the youngest fine hair. One curly the other waves.

This is just my opinion, it's nice to see girls with a little bit of length so shoulder length when little is good. Once they start pre-school you'll want hair that can be tied up nice and high as nits are rampant from here till the last 2 years of primary school and they always go for clean hair. If your daughter has thick hair ( both my girls had nits once) you'll be spending 2 hours every day for 1 to 2 weeks combing and checking for new outbreaks, not a pleasant experience with a young screaming child.

Also at 7 or 8 an average child isn't capable of looking after long hair properly. You'll still need to go over it with detangling spray and brushing daily. Plus some still need help tying their hair back or if it's a fancy style they want, you'll be doing it. My 11 year old still won't take care of her hair even with threats of getting it cut short, everyone else has to brush it, put it up and I give it a really good shampoo once a week. I think the rest of the time she just sticks her head under the shower. :no:

Also by about 10 you'll be getting into discussions of colour and stuff, my 11 year old is currently sporting a hot pink chunk. Luckily with all the swimming she's doing it's fades quickly to a pretty pale pink. Her hair is about mid to lower shoulder blade length and that's as far as I'll let her have it.

Oh head lice... Growing up the oldest of five kids we all got lice at least once a year. I would get mine washed first so I could help Mom wash and brush the rest of the kids' heads. Ug... lol wonderful memories!

I'm hoping my child is like me when it comes to personal hygiene. I can't stand for my hair or face to feel greasy (I shower twice a day) and I can't sleep unless I've brushed my teeth and bathed at night. I found some cute jawline bobs and reverse bobs online that we'll probably go with until she is old enough to decide on her own what she wants to do with her hair.

As for color... if it weren't for my job I'd have crazy colored/styled hair and I'm almost thirty LOL so that won't be an issue for me! If she wants hot pink hair, that's fine. Let her do it while she's young and able to without repercussions from work and the real world. You're only a kid for a little while.

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#30    Simbi Laveau

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Posted 24 January 2013 - 04:15 PM

View PostRockabyeBillie, on 24 January 2013 - 02:20 PM, said:



Oh head lice... Growing up the oldest of five kids we all got lice at least once a year. I would get mine washed first so I could help Mom wash and brush the rest of the kids' heads. Ug... lol wonderful memories!

I'm hoping my child is like me when it comes to personal hygiene. I can't stand for my hair or face to feel greasy (I shower twice a day) and I can't sleep unless I've brushed my teeth and bathed at night. I found some cute jawline bobs and reverse bobs online that we'll probably go with until she is old enough to decide on her own what she wants to do with her hair.

As for color... if it weren't for my job I'd have crazy colored/styled hair and I'm almost thirty LOL so that won't be an issue for me! If she wants hot pink hair, that's fine. Let her do it while she's young and able to without repercussions from work and the real world. You're only a kid for a little while.

My mom used to tell me about lice .
I was lucky,and never got it .

As for color,one of my friends is 55 yrs old,and she just dyed her hair bright purple.
She loves it .


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