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Are Children Basically Bad

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#31    Sherapy


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Posted 10 March 2013 - 05:19 PM

View PostFrank Merton, on 10 March 2013 - 04:10 PM, said:

I would like to take a moment to disagree with the "blank slate" theory of children.  Children are born with a lot of instincts and personality already in place, although it usually takes time to manifest itself, both good and bad.

Parents who do their best and have it turn out badly do not need to blame themselves.  It may be the child's nature that overcomes the best possible nuturing.  Also of course there are many other factors besides the family that complicate the child's upbringing.

I raised a number of adopted children (my wife and I were unable to conceive), and some of them had had really rough infancies (because of war).  Even though we are a literate family with lots of books and so on around, and in spite of a lot of effort and special schools, two of our children remained illiterate -- and Vietnamese is an easier language to learn to read than English.  They are both happy and productive adults, but it is still something hard to accept or even understand.

You must mean Locke's tabla rosa, I think he really pushed that environment triggered existing potential.
I tutor kids who have learning disabilities and the common thread is their early environment's were awful.

#32    ReaperS_ParadoX


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Posted 10 March 2013 - 08:08 PM

View Postealdwita, on 08 March 2013 - 08:11 PM, said:

You don't. If the public at large are in any significant danger, you isolate them.
Even children? OR ar you talking about adults?

Edited by R4z3rsPar4d0x, 10 March 2013 - 08:09 PM.



#33    Beany


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Posted 11 March 2013 - 01:33 AM

View PostQueen in the North, on 08 March 2013 - 07:36 PM, said:

Sometimes I think children seem bad, because they are pushing the boundaries to see how far they can go, or how much they can get away with. But that helps to define the line, so that they know how far they can go and what is acceptable and what isn't...

As a parent, I always believed that children push boundaries not to see how far they could go, but to seek the boundaries they they need in order to feel secure. Imagine being say, 7 years old, and there being no adult around to create the boundaries that keep you safe nor any adult to explain what and where the boundaries are. Then they're left on the own to figure it out, when in fact, they're way too young to figure it out, because that is a job only for a mature mind. Boundaries help our children feel safe, just as routine does. Kids like to know what's coming next; I think that's why they'll watch a favorite movie dozens of times. They LIKE knowing what's coming next. I bought Tortoro for my grandkids, and my son was gobsmacked by how many times a day they watched it.

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