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Plan to charge children for bullying


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#31    Lilly

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 10:11 AM

Never hit my kids...put them in time out (and not a 'fun place to be' either)....unplugged and removed the Nintendo multiple times...took away play dates and various other 'fun stuff'. Result: They are young adults who understand that their actions carry consequences.

In order to raise responsible adults one has to be a responsible adult themself. There lies the problem, our culture has changed. When celebrities can get away with bad behaviour and no one is held to much of any standards this is what happens. Clogging the already overwhelmed legal system with cases involving kids is unlikely to lead to anywhere positive IMO.

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#32    Detective Mystery 2015

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 10:16 AM

That's ridiculous. It's past time to return to common sense and proportionality. This smacks of the ludicrous zero-tolerance laws in the USA, which have resulted in some head-smacking, outrageous decisions on discipline for the "crime" of normalcy, punishment for innocent behavior that's been accepted for centuries by rational individuals who weren't leads in the film, "Idiocracy". I'm talking about "terroristic threats" like shaping a Pop Tart into a gun or telling your friend that you're going to shoot them with your bubble gum.

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#33    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 11:39 AM

View PostAlmagest, on 13 July 2013 - 03:00 AM, said:

I don't think you can chalk up 'kids these days' to a decline in spanking. Kids have always been a pain to the older generations. Do you think kids these days are worse than the Baby Boomers were as kids?

I can only speak from my own experience, but I was more afraid of being lectured by my father than hit by him. He had a way of standing over me and telling me calmly, in a deep voice, that what I did was wrong and that he was disappointed. A smack should not be punishment in itself, it should be reinforcement for such a lecture. The problems of today's youth can't be summed up with 'not enough hitting'. A stable household with a father who doesn't abandon his children, or stay and abuse them, generally produces pretty well-behaved kids.

View PostAlmagest, on 13 July 2013 - 03:00 AM, said:

I don't think you can chalk up 'kids these days' to a decline in spanking. Kids have always been a pain to the older generations. Do you think kids these days are worse than the Baby Boomers were as kids?
;
I can only speak from my own experience, but I was more afraid of being lectured by my father than hit by him. He had a way of standing over me and telling me calmly, in a deep voice, that what I did was wrong and that he was disappointed. A smack should not be punishment in itself, it should be reinforcement for such a lecture. The problems of today's youth can't be summed up with 'not enough hitting'. A stable household with a father who doesn't abandon his children, or stay and abuse them, generally produces pretty well-behaved kids.

Moms used to be mercy and dads disapline.   So if you grow up with a divoced family your missing something, this is true in same. sex couples.

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#34    Sir Wearer of Hats

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 11:50 AM

Ohh bravo - let's blame divorcees and same sex couples for the rise in schoolyard bullying.

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#35    shaddow134

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 12:15 PM

View Postdanielost, on 13 July 2013 - 11:39 AM, said:

Moms used to be mercy and dads disapline.   So if you grow up with a divoced family your missing something, this is true in same. sex couples.
Absolute rubbish,to suggest that Gay couples are unable to raise and keep good discipline for their Kids is ludicrous and somewhat offensive.

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#36    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 12:17 PM

View PostSir Wearer of Hats, on 13 July 2013 - 11:50 AM, said:

Ohh bravo - let's blame divorcees and same sex couples for the rise in schoolyard bullying.

View PostSir Wearer of Hats, on 13 July 2013 - 11:50 AM, said:

Ohh bravo - let's blame divorcees and same sex couples for the rise in schoolyard bullying.

View PostSir Wearer of Hats, on 13 July 2013 - 11:50 AM, said:

Ohh bravo - let's blame divorcees and same sex couples for the rise in schoolyard bullying.

I am a product of divorce and chid abuse.  More mental than phyisacal but both.  I wasn't a bully, I was the one being bullied until I got tired of it and stopped it.

I am a Mormon.  If I don't use Mormons believe, those my beliefs only.
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There are other Mormons on this site. So if I have misspoken about the beliefs. I welcome their input.
I am not perfect and never will be. I do strive to be true to myself. I do my best to stay true to the Mormon faith. Thanks for caring and if you don't peace be with you.

#37    Ryu

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 12:56 PM

Hitting is still hitting regardless of who does it or whom the recipient is.

Hitting an adult is considered an assault and we teach our children not to hit. We lecture them about how to handle feelings and that being angry is no excuse for hitting yet at the same time the same adults will hit their child then tell them something like "Well sweetie, if you hadn't done such and such and made me angry I wouldn't have had to hit you". Hitting is a violent reaction done always out of anger, never love.

I was hit as a child and I did not respect my parents or others. I resented them and I feared their anger and reactions. In turn I lied more to avoid being hit.
Respect is not born out of fear.

More hitting will not solve the bullying problem but defining what actually constitutes bullying helps.
It has gotten so that a kid can't even say "Boo" to the other without some goodies-two-shoes shrieking at them for being "mean".

However at the same time we need to teach children to be a bit more resilient because the world is not an version of Barney the Dinosaur. We need to stop teaching children to be perpetual victims and start standing up for themselves which means emphatically saying "NO!" instead of telling them to beg the bully to stop.
If a child sees something they don't like on a forum or chatroom then teach them to simply leave instead of sitting there and soaking up the verbal sewage.

Kids need a better backbone and less of this "Would you please leave me alone?" or feeding the bully all these "ego cookies". If the teachers refuse to do anything then the child needs to request a meeting with the principal and diplomatically ask them what to do.

See...if you are always "sweet" to the bully, he/she will not magically see the other as this awesomely cool kid. No, the bully will simply see his/her victim as a fool and takes the constant passiveness and submission as a clear permission slip to keep doing what they've been doing. Any reversal of heart is rare.

Violence solves nothing but playing an active role in individual cases will.

It is not that I necessarily dislike people or that I don't "play well" with others but rather I do better and prefer playing alone.

#38    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 01:24 PM

View Postshaddow134, on 13 July 2013 - 12:15 PM, said:


Absolute rubbish,to suggest that Gay couples are unable to raise and keep good discipline for their Kids is ludicrous and somewhat offensive.

I didn't say thaqt.  I said something was missing.

I am a Mormon.  If I don't use Mormons believe, those my beliefs only.
I do not go to church haven't for thirty years.
There are other Mormons on this site. So if I have misspoken about the beliefs. I welcome their input.
I am not perfect and never will be. I do strive to be true to myself. I do my best to stay true to the Mormon faith. Thanks for caring and if you don't peace be with you.

#39    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 01:27 PM

One of the adds against bulling.  I am not sure which bully they are talking about.  The one who tred to force his way into a bus seat or the one who hit him.  They are both bullies.

I am a Mormon.  If I don't use Mormons believe, those my beliefs only.
I do not go to church haven't for thirty years.
There are other Mormons on this site. So if I have misspoken about the beliefs. I welcome their input.
I am not perfect and never will be. I do strive to be true to myself. I do my best to stay true to the Mormon faith. Thanks for caring and if you don't peace be with you.

#40    rashore

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 02:15 PM

Something I find interesting about this... Why is it considered bullying in kids, but harassment and assault in adults? Is there law about harassment and assault for minors already? If so, what makes those charges different from bullying? And if not, why not?


#41    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 02:48 PM

There is more to bulling than just hitting.  But, the solution is to stand up to them. This does not have to include hitting/fighting.

I am a Mormon.  If I don't use Mormons believe, those my beliefs only.
I do not go to church haven't for thirty years.
There are other Mormons on this site. So if I have misspoken about the beliefs. I welcome their input.
I am not perfect and never will be. I do strive to be true to myself. I do my best to stay true to the Mormon faith. Thanks for caring and if you don't peace be with you.

#42    FLOMBIE

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 02:57 PM

Mobbing is a very common form of bullying. Happened to me, i stood up against it (without fighting) and it stopped.


#43    Bavarian Raven

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 03:13 PM

To throw my two cents in. I was spanked thrice as a child. Only three times and thinking back each of those times I truly deserved it. Did it make me respect my parents less? He'll no. I have the utmost respect with my parents and a great relationship with them still. Will spanking solve all problems? No. But it is a tool in a tool box, one that should be allowed in certain circumstances in moderation. If done right it is not abuse IMHO, and it goes drive the point of consequences home. That, IMHO, the lack of consequences is one of the things leading to an increase in bullying.


#44    danielost

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 03:19 PM

View PostLilly, on 13 July 2013 - 10:11 AM, said:

Never hit my kids...put them in time out (and not a 'fun place to be' either)....unplugged and removed the Nintendo multiple times...took away play dates and various other 'fun stuff'. Result: They are young adults who understand that their actions carry consequences.

In order to raise responsible adults one has to be a responsible adult themself. There lies the problem, our culture has changed. When celebrities can get away with bad behaviour and no one is held to much of any standards this is what happens. Clogging the already overwhelmed legal system with cases involving kids is unlikely to lead to anywhere positive IMO.

This reminds me of the parent who said he had to send his kid to the parents room, because of all the stuff in the kids room.

I am a Mormon.  If I don't use Mormons believe, those my beliefs only.
I do not go to church haven't for thirty years.
There are other Mormons on this site. So if I have misspoken about the beliefs. I welcome their input.
I am not perfect and never will be. I do strive to be true to myself. I do my best to stay true to the Mormon faith. Thanks for caring and if you don't peace be with you.

#45    Sakari

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Posted 13 July 2013 - 04:49 PM

View Postpatagonianhorsesnake, on 13 July 2013 - 05:46 AM, said:

yeah, keep using phrases like "the pussification of america". that's sure going to make me take you seriously.

I only use that phrase, not any others. It is just a easier way to say it, and it is blunt and to the point......I use it also for things like stupid lawsuits we hear about. ( McDonalds Hot Coffee in lap, etc. )

I do not care if you take me serious or not. I am posting how I feel, and I feel that America ( and some other places ) have become to " sensitive "...A bunch of Pussies if you will..To the point it is hurting everyone. If you do not like the way I phrase it, oh well, not my issue.




View PostThe world needs you, on 13 July 2013 - 05:57 AM, said:

Very honest.




Same to you as above.

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