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Things you never wanna hear from aliens


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56 replies to this topic

#1    ambelamba

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 07:28 AM

"Weapons hot! Show no mercy! Fire! Fire! Fire!"

"Foh Teh Empppppraaaahhhhhh!!!!!"

"Earthling sighted! Target acquired! Charging weapon! Unleash hell!!!!"

"You hairless monkey! It's a good day to die!"

"Stew that human!"

"Bring the flamer! Light it up! Fire in the hole!"

"GO FOR BROKE!!!!!!"

"Earthlings, I suggest you to surrender. Just pull down your pants and bend over. Or we will make you!"

"Feel the fury of 20mm tungsten shells, 500 rounds per minute, 30km per second, and 40 lbs per round. Accept no substitute."


Sorry, guys. After reading about that Urarius folks from io9, I couldn't help it.

They came with a Bible and their religion. stole our land, crushed our spirit, and now they tell us we should be thankful to the Lord for being saved.

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#2    Frank Merton

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 08:14 AM

"We are here to help you."


#3    Rlyeh

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 08:23 AM

Prepare the probe


#4    DingoLingo

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 09:20 AM

Crop Circles? What are you going on about laver Human..


#5    toast

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 09:49 AM

"Females? What`s that?"

“For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.”  - Hunter S. Thompson -
"Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my trousers!" - James T. Kirk -
"I think enormous harm is done by religion – not just in the name of religion, but actually by religion." - Steven Weinberg -  
"I am discounting the reports of UFOs. Why would they appear only to cranks and weirdos?" - Stephen Hawking -

#6    Rlyeh

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 10:39 AM

"That's the smallest one we've seen"


#7    Astra00

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 10:40 AM

"If we show you ours, will you show us yours"?   :unsure:

Edited by Astra00, 07 February 2014 - 10:43 AM.

~ Never let anyone define who you are ~

#8    QuiteContrary

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 10:54 AM

"You're gonna be worth something back home!"
"This one is still breathing."
"Trust me."


#9    Eldorado

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 10:59 AM

We come to seek asylum.  All 3 billion of us.

The Borg are chasing us.

Edited by Eldorado, 07 February 2014 - 11:06 AM.


#10    Almagest

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 11:03 AM

View PostAstra00, on 07 February 2014 - 10:40 AM, said:

"If we show you ours, will you show us yours"?   :unsure:

Hey, there are some of us who might actually want to hear that. :D

Life is the result of the struggle between dynamic opposites Form & Chaos, Substance & Oblivion, Light & Dark And all the infinite variations of Yin & Yang
When the pendulum swings in favour of one It will eventually swing in favour of it's opposite Thus the balance of the universe is maintained

-Jeru the Damaja

#11    Taun

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 11:32 AM

"Hmmm... That's wierd that the green mucus fever affects you that way... It's just a childhood disease for us."


#12    Almagest

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 12:04 PM

"We have witness the behaviour of the one you call Bie-ber, and judged the human species fit for extermination"

Life is the result of the struggle between dynamic opposites Form & Chaos, Substance & Oblivion, Light & Dark And all the infinite variations of Yin & Yang
When the pendulum swings in favour of one It will eventually swing in favour of it's opposite Thus the balance of the universe is maintained

-Jeru the Damaja

#13    libstaK

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 12:21 PM

Our people are starving, we have come seeking new sources of meat.

"I warn you, whoever you are, oh you who wish to probe the arcanes of nature, if you do not find within yourself that which you seek, neither shall you find it outside.
If you ignore the excellencies of your own house, how do you intend to find other excellencies?
In you is hidden the treasure of treasures, Oh man, know thyself and you shall know the Universe and the Gods."

Inscription - Temple of Delphi

#14    Frank Merton

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 01:48 PM

"There is no god but Allah, and Mohamed is his prophet."


#15    ancient astronaut

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Posted 07 February 2014 - 02:03 PM

We are sorry about your anus. Our bad.

Edited by ancient astronaut, 07 February 2014 - 02:04 PM.

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