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#1    nondreamer01

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Posted 01 October 2005 - 07:19 PM

I'm 16 years old, my mom I think went crazy in last two days. My dad is superintendent in building and once had a romantic relationship with a tenant and my mom found out, but they all just became friends, bu soon after, they brought a gift for my baby brother and my mom took it, but then her hands started to close, her eyes, etc and my grandmother robbed the whole family down with oils and holy water....the tenants soon came down and my mom threw the rest of holy water at the tenant and her mother and the water flew right on the mother (the mother of the woman my dad was having relationship with at side, but not sexual)...


But now my whole family is sad, my mom has gone nuts trying avoid the family from getting affected magically, she went to church with all of us and came back yesterday not herself, she keeps saying she forgives people and that to trust her and she keep making small issues big and saying "you know what.... etc" all through the two days. She called the police and the police wanted to take her to the mad house but she got lucky....she's not acting HERSELF!!!!!...sometimes she would look down and talk to the tenant (who is not actually there) and she would say all this biblical stuff towards the tenant's children and family like if they are there but not actually, she keeps asking us "whats going on" I dont know what to do,  I am scared I am going to lose my mother, even my father was crying, which he doesnt do because she is not the same person she was two days ago. I know this is long, but I need to be more specific for someone to give me advice or let me know
whats going on....please!!!!! I want my mom back. before, we werent too into Christianity, but in like a week, she just became obssessive with the religion, my life is ruined right now....no ones knows what to do!!!! to help. We prayed and prayed and prayed but everything resulted in negativity, please, hear my cry and respond as soon as possible. crying.gif

Edited by nondreamer01, 01 October 2005 - 07:22 PM.


#2    zandore

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Posted 01 October 2005 - 07:56 PM

I am sorry but the help that it sounds like you need....you will not find here. Do you have a school councilor you can talk with?

I wish you the best of luck.

"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy,
education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary.
Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of punishment and hope of reward after death."

Albert Einstein


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#3    Sherapy

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 03:41 AM

Infidelity is very difficult for people to deal with its shattering its as if the rug gets pulled out from your life, you are a very loving and wonderful child but this is to big for you to fix , its okay to just be a teenager as dark as it seems now it will get better for reasons that only your parents can understand they have tio handle this certainly love your mother and father but the best thing you can do is let them handle their problems , Being 16 is hard enough but to handle an adults issues is not possible  do you have someone you can talk with someone to hang out with its important you care for yourself your Mom will be alright, can you talk with a counsler?? that would be the best there are resources look in the yellow pages ask aroud ask at your school in the office there will be something if you need to talk  or vent  PM me anytime namaste Sheri

Edited by Sheri berri, 02 October 2005 - 04:47 AM.


#4    Yelekiah

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 04:13 AM

Zandore and sheri gave excellent advice.
Be patient, pray, since it isn't something that can be solved overnight necessarily. A good way to deal is by writing it down, trying to cope with your emotions, then solve the problem logically. Writing down the way you feel about a situation can act as a makeshift vent. Let your feelings out, but without trying to escape them entirely.
Have you tried speaking with you mother?

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#5    Ken1Burton

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 04:46 AM

Nondreamer01

You love your Mother. But there are times the Child becomes the Parent. The parents need caring for. Usually this happens when the Parents get very old. But not always.

Here is where the Strength of the Family can stand or fail. Your Mother is having a rough time. And it more then likely scares her more then it scares you and your dad. Don’t all of you panic.

Many people when they see God differently go overboard in the other family members eyes. From what you have said, I can see why your Mother might not have felt too loved. Even accepting it, does not take away the feeling of rejection.

Now she seems to see Love, A love that is often called Born Again by Christians. A love she can not risk losing. You did not talk of any other family members. But at 16, You are close to going out on your own. I assume Mothers see this more then males. Losing who needs them. Losing what makes their life have purpose.

A little understanding of what a person goes through when they come to Christ in this way might be useful to you. Your Mother like most others have the concepts insider her the Churches have been implanting since we were born.

YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE. So this is on her mind. We can say we forgive, We can mean it, But we can not forget, so we wonder if we really forgave out of our heart? Each time something happens, all the bitterness comes back. The Husband is late. Where is he? Why is he not here? Is he cheating? As all the thoughts come back in.

Anger is like a bonfire, it grows fast. And like it or not, Love the Lord or not, We all get angry. Then it is just more we need to repent for, and that also we have been told over and over, We need to REPENT.

Even if you do not believe, You need to be there for her. And she would also be very worried about those she loves. Unsure they are saved will drive her to get others to Christ. Here most go overboard. But they do not have any choice. No more then seeing a loved one drowning, They will jump into the water even if they do not know how to swim.

Ask her is God loves you more then she does? Hard one for a Mother, But she should say “Yes.”
Then ask her, if God loves her more then you do? Then ask, “If our God is that loving, and Jesus took away the sin of the world, Can He not just out of love. Forgive us without us even asking?

Jesus did not ask Barabbas if He would accept Him taking his place on the cross, He just took it. The wages of sin is death, and Jesus took our paychecks at a place called Golgotha.

We can not get angry enough to have God turn away. We can not even hate others or God Himself to have God turn away. We are bought with a price. Jesus did not say the cost was too much. Even knowing He had to go into hell because He had all our sins upon Him, He said “Into Thy hands, I commend My Spirit.”

Jesus ended hell on the third day, It was a place of sleep till Jesus died for sin. They all left the third day. All mankind saved by grace. God concluded all in unbelief so no man can boast.

(ZECHARIAH 9:11) As for thee also, by the blood of thy covenant I
have sent forth thy prisoners out of the pit wherein is no water. (KJV)

(ISAIAH 26:19) Thy dead men shall live, together with my dead body
shall they arise. Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust: for thy
dew is as the dew of herbs, and the earth shall cast out the dead. (KJV)

His dead body rose on the third day. and everyone else went with Him. Those who are forgiven more, will loveth more.

Stand by your Mother, God does not toss away love, He uses it, And I think you are seeing how much you love your Mother a lot more then you did. And so does your dad. But remember, God does not forsake. Your Mother is the one going through the fire. Those who love them, just feel the heat.

Ken

Know the Truth and it will set you free, Share the Truth, He's worth knowing.

#6    JoeBean24

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 04:51 AM

I sympathize with you recently at my house my mom has almost had a complete breakdown and was going to kill herself basically because my grandpa has been driving her crazy since we have to take care of him ect anyways just try to stick togeather as a family and i hope everything turns out ok. find friends to talk to so you are ok also i wish you the best of luck.


#7    nondreamer01

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:22 PM

Quote


I sympathize with you recently at my house my mom has almost had a complete breakdown and was going to kill herself basically because my grandpa has been driving her crazy since we have to take care of him ect anyways just try to stick togeather as a family and i hope everything turns out ok. find friends to talk to so you are ok also i wish you the best of luck.



What the f***!!!, u think this is a joke....I am sick of praying!!!, too much of a good thing is not good...she started praying and the whole family started praying but she went crazy from it....she keeps talking about a baby spirit that use to be in the house and now she cant find it and darkness took over, we live in the building basement in Brooklyn, NY, and she says that St. Anthony wants back what he/she lost, and her mind is busy......she keeps saying things that are so weird and she says that if we dont listen to her she's going to die.....she keeps asking for pepsi and water and she keeps peeing and peeing and she cant sleep for more than 3 hours without waking up back to who she's not. Recently she said that a curse spread to her from her mother, that when she was young her father beat her and there were drums in the house (in Trinidad and Tobago island) and someone was whistling and her mom sent her this small little spooky tombstone looking thing saying " the grass withers and the flower fades but the word of God stand forever".....I am scared, nothing about counselor, shut up about that, I am scared I am going to lose my mother....it seems that my aunty forsaw this .....she started crying and told my mom not to go mad off of this and just the same night when it started, I told my mom not to over do it, that she is going to go mad, and she yelled at me and said "No! I'm not!", but never the less she did, she keeps worrying and worrying about people dying and talking about people trying to take souls and forgiving people like if they are right there next to her....I want my mom, she is my life, she cooks, she cleans, she washes, she combs my hair and I am trying to stay strong but my dad keeps being weak and crying, and he keeps saying she is running him away......somebody, tell me what to do, my father wants to know the same as well, pleaseeeeeee before anything happens, cause if I lose my mom (God forbid) I may end my life.....help!!!



#8    nondreamer01

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:30 PM

Quote


Nondreamer01

You love your Mother. But there are times the Child becomes the Parent. The parents need caring for. Usually this happens when the Parents get very old. But not always.

Here is where the Strength of the Family can stand or fail. Your Mother is having a rough time. And it more then likely scares her more then it scares you and your dad. Don’t all of you panic.

Many people when they see God differently go overboard in the other family members eyes. From what you have said, I can see why your Mother might not have felt too loved. Even accepting it, does not take away the feeling of rejection.

Now she seems to see Love, A love that is often called Born Again by Christians. A love she can not risk losing. You did not talk of any other family members. But at 16, You are close to going out on your own. I assume Mothers see this more then males. Losing who needs them. Losing what makes their life have purpose.

A little understanding of what a person goes through when they come to Christ in this way might be useful to you. Your Mother like most others have the concepts insider her the Churches have been implanting since we were born.

YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE. So this is on her mind. We can say we forgive, We can mean it, But we can not forget, so we wonder if we really forgave out of our heart? Each time something happens, all the bitterness comes back. The Husband is late. Where is he? Why is he not here? Is he cheating? As all the thoughts come back in.

Anger is like a bonfire, it grows fast. And like it or not, Love the Lord or not, We all get angry. Then it is just more we need to repent for, and that also we have been told over and over, We need to REPENT.

Even if you do not believe, You need to be there for her. And she would also be very worried about those she loves. Unsure they are saved will drive her to get others to Christ. Here most go overboard. But they do not have any choice. No more then seeing a loved one drowning, They will jump into the water even if they do not know how to swim.

Ask her is God loves you more then she does? Hard one for a Mother, But she should say “Yes.”
Then ask her, if God loves her more then you do? Then ask, “If our God is that loving, and Jesus took away the sin of the world, Can He not just out of love. Forgive us without us even asking?

Jesus did not ask Barabbas if He would accept Him taking his place on the cross, He just took it. The wages of sin is death, and Jesus took our paychecks at a place called Golgotha.

We can not get angry enough to have God turn away. We can not even hate others or God Himself to have God turn away. We are bought with a price. Jesus did not say the cost was too much. Even knowing He had to go into hell because He had all our sins upon Him, He said “Into Thy hands, I commend My Spirit.”

Jesus ended hell on the third day, It was a place of sleep till Jesus died for sin. They all left the third day. All mankind saved by grace. God concluded all in unbelief so no man can boast.

(ZECHARIAH 9:11) As for thee also, by the blood of thy covenant I
have sent forth thy prisoners out of the pit wherein is no water. (KJV)

(ISAIAH 26:19) Thy dead men shall live, together with my dead body
shall they arise. Awake and sing, ye that dwell in dust: for thy
dew is as the dew of herbs, and the earth shall cast out the dead. (KJV)

His dead body rose on the third day. and everyone else went with Him. Those who are forgiven more, will loveth more.

Stand by your Mother, God does not toss away love, He uses it, And I think you are seeing how much you love your Mother a lot more then you did. And so does your dad. But remember, God does not forsake. Your Mother is the one going through the fire. Those who love them, just feel the heat.

Ken




My dad didnt cheat, they tell each other evrything and i find out, he never had a sexual relationship with anyone else for 15 years together, but did get romantic with two women, one in Trinidad (where the rest of my relatives reside) and one-the tenant of this building.




#9    zandore

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:35 PM

Nondreamer I don't think JB's (JoeBean) attitude was like that at all. I got the impression that he was sympathizing (Knows what you are feeling) with you. To go off on people like that will only make others avoid you.

Talk to a school councilor or your church pastor because I don't think you will get the advice you need here. Few if any here are trained to give that kind of advice.

"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy,
education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary.
Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of punishment and hope of reward after death."

Albert Einstein


Survey Says....


#10    nondreamer01

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:37 PM

Quote


Nondreamer I don't think JB's (JoeBean) attitude was like that at all. I got the impression that he was sympathizing (Knows what you are feeling) with you. To go off on people like that will only make others avoid you.

Talk to a school councilor or your church pastor because I don't think you will get the advice you need here. Few if any here are trained to give that kind of advice.



Stop telling me about pastor and councilor, I only went to Church here once and that was on Friday and I did not meet any pastor...and to that other person, my mom is 34 and my dad is 36, I have a 5 year old sister named Emperess and a 3 year old brother named Mystic and my name is Akeem.



#11    zandore

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:40 PM

You asked for help and I tried to help you.

Good luck

"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy,
education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary.
Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of punishment and hope of reward after death."

Albert Einstein


Survey Says....


#12    JoeBean24

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 05:46 PM

Quote


What the f***!!!, u think this is a joke....I am sick of praying!!!, too much of a good thing is not good...she started praying and the whole family started praying but she went crazy from it....she keeps talking about a baby spirit that use to be in the house and now she cant find it and darkness took over, we live in the building basement in Brooklyn, NY, and she says that St. Anthony wants back what he/she lost, and her mind is busy......she keeps saying things that are so weird and she says that if we dont listen to her she's going to die.....she keeps asking for pepsi and water and she keeps peeing and peeing and she cant sleep for more than 3 hours without waking up back to who she's not. Recently she said that a curse spread to her from her mother, that when she was young her father beat her and there were drums in the house (in Trinidad and Tobago island) and someone was whistling and her mom sent her this small little spooky tombstone looking thing saying " the grass withers and the flower fades but the word of God stand forever".....I am scared, nothing about counselor, shut up about that, I am scared I am going to lose my mother....it seems that my aunty forsaw this .....she started crying and told my mom not to go mad off of this and just the same night when it started, I told my mom not to over do it, that she is going to go mad, and she yelled at me and said "No! I'm not!", but never the less she did, she keeps worrying and worrying about people dying and talking about people trying to take souls and forgiving people like if they are right there next to her....I want my mom, she is my life, she cooks, she cleans, she washes, she combs my hair and I am trying to stay strong but my dad keeps being weak and crying, and he keeps saying she is running him away......somebody, tell me what to do, my father wants to know the same as well, pleaseeeeeee before anything happens, cause if I lose my mom (God forbid) I may end my life.....help!!!

I am sorry if you misunderstood me i am not saying pray more or anything like that. i am an atheist myself. all i am saying is that if you talk about things with your family and be there for eachother then maybe things will get better. i am sorry if i ofended you.


#13    nondreamer01

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 06:51 PM

No problem...I'm sorry, I am just mad because I cant get an answer, my dad said he will carry her to private doctor tomorrow, because he cant carry her to hospital or else they would put her in mad house.


#14    zandore

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 06:58 PM

It is times like this that people can get very tense. You did not mean any offense so none was taken OK? thumbsup.gif

If you ask someone for help don't snap at them if it not what you want to hear. Sometimes the best advice is what we know but do not like.

"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy,
education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary.
Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear
of punishment and hope of reward after death."

Albert Einstein


Survey Says....


#15    GreenmansGod

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Posted 02 October 2005 - 10:55 PM

You need a trusted adult to deal with this, a family member, teacher, counselor, any adult you know and trust.   Your Mom has been betrayed, and your Dad is still seeing this women. (With or without sex, who really knows?) It really sounds ugly.  Whatever, it is their problem not yours. You may think it is because they are dumping it on you.  NO, parent has the right to do that to their child.  You need an impartial adult to speak for you, so you can maintain your rights and sanity.   Please get real help and have them help you stand up for yourself.  16 - 18 is a short space in time, you got a lot of things to prepare for to be an adult. Focus as much as you can on school as a distraction.  When your parents are having their emotional outbursts find a quiet place to go.  I found when I was a young man my headphones could drown out most of my parents arguments.  Your parents need to work out their problems without involving you as much as possible.
All the best to you.  


"The moment you declare a set of ideas to be immune from criticism, satire, derision, or contempt, freedom of thought becomes impossible." Salman Rushdie




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