Sign In
Register
Help
Board Index
Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration
10 thoughts for 2006
Rate Topic:
#1
- Alien Abducter
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 5,079
- Joined: 31-October 03
- Gender:Female
- Location:USA, Tennessee
-
'For we walk by faith, not by sight.' II Corinthians 5:7
Posted 06 January 2006 - 04:54 PM
I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is.
Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin. ~anonymous~
Top
MultiQuote
#2
- -¤-^]§đńđ Ěl Ö§˘ľrďę[^-¤-
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 10,268
- Joined: 30-March 05
- Gender:Female
- Location:ĺmíd hč dăŽké§ hŕdôw§
-
hęrę ĺrę ńđ ßęĺľďŁľl §ľrŁĺ˘ę§ wďhđľ ĺ ęrrďßlę Đęţh
Posted 06 January 2006 - 06:31 PM
Quote
Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Gawd...that is SO true!
Great find!
§ĺĽ whĺ Ľđľ męĺń ĺńĐ męĺń whĺ Ľđľ §ĺĽ
#3
- Ectoplasmic Residue
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 175
- Joined: 01-August 05
- Gender:Male
- Location:Lithuania
-
Never argue with idiots
they bring you down to their level
and beat you with their experience.
Posted 06 January 2006 - 06:57 PM
yea that was VERY funny lmao 
"the mysteries of the universe are revealed when you break stuff
#4
- Apparition
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 314
- Joined: 09-June 05
- Location:Texas
-
I have to return some videotapes.
Posted 06 January 2006 - 07:12 PM
Sounds like these would be from Letterman. I like number 1 though.
*Signature removed, exceeds permitted size guidelines - Click Here for details.
#6
- Ectoplasmic Residue
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 234
- Joined: 20-December 05
- Location:Florida
-
The truth always rises above the lies that hold it at any unexpected time
Posted 06 January 2006 - 09:07 PM
Quote
Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
This is my all time favorite one
#8
- Forum Divinity
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 19,841
- Joined: 08-March 05
- Gender:Female
- Location:~Sylvanic~
-
♥Give Thanks♥
Posted 07 January 2006 - 04:56 AM
Quote
Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
Far Out Man . .
#9
- The Zipparumpazoo!!!
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 15,677
- Joined: 17-April 05
- Gender:Male
- Location:Sydney
-
Paranoid Android..... wilful ignorance is not a disease - it's a choice!!!
Posted 08 January 2006 - 11:19 AM
HAHAHA, very funny. THis was my favourite:
Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
It wasn't the funniest, but it was the truest
Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
It wasn't the funniest, but it was the truest
"What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object?" - PA vs Tiggs - Did Jesus Really exist? - The Formal Debate: HERE
"Christ-mythers are the young-earth Creationists of the historical community"!
#11
- I am a horrible person =D
-
- Group: Banned
- Posts: 1,654
- Joined: 27-April 05
- Location:HERE!
-
To those who have been watching all this time...
Posted 09 January 2006 - 05:56 AM
Quote
HAHAHA, very funny. THis was my favourite:
Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
It wasn't the funniest, but it was the truest
I didn't tought that was funny, taxes are never funny
Dont look at me like that, i'm innocent as a human!
#12
- Cosmic Muppet..!
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 31,585
- Joined: 01-November 05
- Gender:Female
- Location:Ireland
-
Talking to myself is not the 1st sign of madness, it's only the 2nd sign...the 1st sign is talking to you!!
Posted 09 January 2006 - 02:50 PM
Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Months even
Months even
RAW Berris... Dare you enter? The public became more aware of the recession when they watched - Deal or No Deal, the presenter went to call the banker and there was no one there !! LOL
#13
- Psychic Spy
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 1,647
- Joined: 28-January 05
- Location:Why are you asking?
-
Your friendly neighborhood skeptic
Posted 10 January 2006 - 12:33 AM
Quote
Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky...not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
That was the best one by far.
Advice on how to improve your psychic powers
Avater done by Mr. Fahrenheit
Avater done by Mr. Fahrenheit
#14
- Remote Viewer
-
- Group: Member
- Posts: 587
- Joined: 07-May 06
- Gender:Male
- Location:Everywhere and nowhere
-
Anakin you're going down a path I can't follow. -Padme
I reject your reality and subsitute it with my own. -Adam Savage -Mythbusters
Posted 11 November 2006 - 03:10 PM
Quote
Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 - We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration
Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day, but teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
p.s. i love the last one, i've heard it before on UM though.
(\__/) this is bunny. copy and paste him into your
(='.'=) signature and help him gain world domanation.
(")_(")
avatar animation by thebarman.
(Isn't he amazing.)
My webpage
