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dreaming of a dead loved one


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#16    zsacchi

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Posted 12 December 2007 - 10:30 AM

my grandmother died a year ago. i was the one who cared for her that is why i was very close to her. she always tell me that i am her favorite granddaughter.  after she died, i always dream about her. i dreamed of her two weeks in a row... it was really odd coz most of my dreams were all nightmares. i can't explain why i was so scared then i'll wake up and be afraid some more because i realized that she's is really no longer with me.
it was hard because she's the only family i have since my parents are working overseas.

when i started picking up the pieces and moved on with my life. the nightmare stopped. but recently, i had this strange dream. i was lying in my bed sleeping then i felt that someone from my back hugged me. i panicked at first and then found out that it was my grams asking me how are things with me and that she missed me. she even thanked me for caring for her and told me she loved me and will always watch over me. i told her that i am happy to see her again and that i love her too. i even told her to wait for me when its my time to leave this world already. she laughed and told me not to think of negative things because im still young and will have a long life to live. i was so happy with our conversation. she seemed happy and healthy. she even showed me her dress coz she is wearing pink. i think it was a long dream coz i can't remember the rest of the things she told me. but i remembered her voice and her hugged. it was all very clear. in the middle of the dream she just vanished and i woke up.


#17    the eternal me

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Posted 14 December 2007 - 11:19 AM

coldethyl on Sep 19 2006, 08:36 PM, said:

Usually repetition dreams are about unresolved conflict.  You need to resolve in your own mind whatever it was that you didn't get to say or do with this person.  Usually if you visualize saying or doing it nightly then the dreams will diminish and eventually completely stop.

Hope this helps.  Good luck.



i agree, it may not be a conflict, but you are not letting yourself "feel" something that you should. let yourself go through it to get it out of your system.


#18    Blueguardian

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Posted 15 December 2007 - 09:46 AM

hello watchstopper, i had a similar expirience, but it only happened once, about 2 weeks after my dog died (golden retriever, loyal and faithful, wouldnt hurt a fly) the dream took place in a field of green garss and he was there, and he sat down in front of me and i just started patting him, his fur felt so real, it helped me a lot in my troubled time.

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#19    lucinda

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Posted 15 December 2007 - 05:53 PM

watchstopper on Sep 18 2006, 07:50 PM, said:

I lost someone I loved almost 3 years ago and I can not stop dreaming about him. It is so real! He wants to see me and talk to me and all I can tell him is that he is dead. He haunts my dreams. He always wants to show me things but I am scared. How can I get to the point of talking to him about what he wants. I have also considered that it is me wanting him alive so badly.He was only 35 and I wonder if I am bringing these dreams on myself. It is frustrating me to no end. has anyone had this happen?


I dn't have much to add to this topic...but did just want to say that I have had this happen with my beloved dog, Maggy, who passed away a couple of years ago after her being a close companion since childhood...about 11 years I had her.....and several months after she passed I thought I had accepted it, but I started to have constant dreams of her death....over and over....she actually had to be put down, which still haunts me and is making me chke up while writing this....I just keep remembering how much she didn't know what was going on and how much I really didn't want to put her down, but her death was inevitable and would have been a very painful way to go.....I don't understand why I had those nightmares, but they have stopped....and I don't know what made them stop either.

I also had a dream several weeks ago that was partially lucid, in that I knew I was dreaming, but wasn't in control of what happened.....but in the dream my grandmother, who I only 'met' as an infant, spoke to me and loved me like I have never felt loved by my immediate family....it was a very reassuring dream.

I don't know reasons to give you why, but what most people have responded with...it probably is an unresolved conflict or unacceptance on your part that they have past since they were so young...you could be angry, very understandably so. I'm no expert on the physical loss of loved ones..


"The devil dances inside empty pockets
But she never wanted money or pearls
No, that wasn't enough for Lucinda
She wasn't that kind of girl

Now I've fallen from grace for Lucinda
Whoever thought that hell would be so cold
I did well for an old tin can sailor
But she wanted the bell in my soul"


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#20    The Last Unicorn

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Posted 16 December 2007 - 01:55 PM

I too believe it's very natural to dream about loved ones once they have passed over, especially in the first year or two after, and I'm certain that sometimes they just want you to know they are ok.

My father passed away last year in the summer, age 40 due to alcoholic liver disease. It was very unexpected, even though we knew he drank too much. I think it was a bit of a shock to him as well. I can't explain why I think this really. He passed away about 7am before me, my two younger sisters, brother and boyfriend could make it to the hospital one last time.

I havew had several dream since then. When I returned to my flat after being at the hospital that day I could smell him... Particularly in the bathroom and the bedroom. It was a very distinctive smell, that I remember from when he used to drive me and my siblings to school in the morning. It was pretty comforting, but I couldn't take it in much.

I've had dreams where I've cried on him, hugged him, shouted at him etc. He never says much he just has this deep, sort of sad/empathetic look in his eyes which he had the year before he died, he has said "I love you" in dreams though. Another odd thing was all of the year before I kept telling my partner how worried I was about him. I didn't know why. I thought I was worried about him in a more psychological way, as in worried about how depressed he was. But it was those sad eyes that instilled this worry in me. Everytime we'd say goodbye, the year before he died he looked so wide eyed and sad, and it made me feel quiet and confused for hours after, like I just wished I could comfort him.

One particular dream I had was kind of sweet. He was in my mum's living room by the tv with a glass of what looked like cider. I remember going over to him and crying on his shoulders and saying sorry. Again he didn't say much. I remember then taking the glass of cider and throwing the liquid onto the carpet. He started laughing, and so did my mum, who was behind us. We kind of found it sad, and poignant yet funny at the same time.

my youngest sister hada dream, I guess she was about 6 or 7, very soon after the funeral. During it she said he came to her and picked her up, and said several things to her. One thing was that he thanked her for waving at the door of intensive care (she was upset she hadn't been allowed to go in.) He also said to her 'I sent the boat for mummy.' (on the day of the funeral the wake was held at a riverside pub as he loved fishing on the river. The only boat that pulled up was one called Mary Jane, my mother's name.) he also said he had met her grandad (my mums dad who died before all the grandkids were born) and was with bubbles (a kitten that had gotten run over before my little sis was born.) he also said to send his love to everyone, which was a phrase he used a lot. This dream soothed us all for quite a while, as you can imagine. For a while after Jennie said she could talk to my dad when she wanted to. I don't think my mother encouraged it though, so she soon forgot about it.

I don't know about anyone else, but whenever I dream of a lost loved one I may wake up a little nostalgic, but the overriding feeling is one of gratitude, that I got to see and perhaps even feel someone I thought I had lost. It feels that real to me.

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#21    tipsy_munchkin

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Posted 16 December 2007 - 02:38 PM

Again i think it is normal to dream about a  loved one. they are still in our thoughts and therefore our dreams. Out of family members that have passed on the only one i dream of often is my mother. Uaually though she appears if in the dream i've done something i shouldn't and sooner or later she turns up to tell me off. A dream can include anything that is within your mind or on your mind and i find my dreams of my mother are as vivd as my nmemories of her.

    

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#22    mushroom

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Posted 09 April 2008 - 02:15 AM

i lost my aunt 2 years ago on this day. we were EXTREMELY CLOSE.
for the first few months after she died i drempt about her all the time. i would wake up in the middle of the night because i heard her call my name.
i would feel her presence around me alll the time.

the day after she died, i was home alone doing the wash to take on the trip to go to her funeral. my mother and most of our family had already left because they got word that she wasnt going to be able to hang on much longer. i was about 14 at the time and my mom wouldnt let me go because she knew it would brake my heart to see my aunt in such a deteriorating state. but she died and there was NO way i was missing her funeral. so i was in the hallway where my washer and dryer unit is located and all of a sudden, as i was reaching down to grab the soap, i got the vibe that my aunt was walking through the hall, so i was about to turn around and say hello but then i realized, wait, my aunt is died last night? then i could see something or someone, my aunt, walk by behind me and the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up. and i about went crazy. i FREAKED out. i ran outta the hall, grabbed the phone and ran outside my house and immediately called my father. i was in such a pannic state that it took me about 4 times to dial the number right. i finally reached it and told him what happened. i was so scared to go back into the house. idk why tho. and it made me sad bc i was afraid to come in contact with my own beloved aunt. the next few months i didnt go to the bathroom in the middle of the night haha. i was too afraid to see the spirit or feel my aunt in my presence.  i would run through that hall and get to the other side as fast as possible. ya see, my aunt lived in TX, but she had the type of job where she could work any where she wanted to. so she decided to come out to san diego to be close to family. so she lived in a studio hotel room untill she found a lump in her breast and found that she had cancer. she started doing chemo and lived with us for about 6 months until she transfered to my gpas then back to her home in texas about a week b4 she died. i think she knew she was going to pass.

about 3 months after she died i went to a summer camp. we took a camp picture like most do. my grandfather picked me up and took me to his house to stay for a day or two. i had my stuff in the back bedroom, my aunts old room when she lived there. i had my suitcase on the bed. i was home alone and i took out my picture to see it. i had it rolled up in my bag with a rubberband. i looked at it for a few moments then rolled it back up and put it back between the the suitcase itself and the flap to hold it in place. i went to take a shower. when i returned to the room, my camp picture was laying flat on the bed in a position as if some one was sitting at the part where the pillows just sittin there lookin at the picture. it was so weird becuase no one was home and i remembered whre and how i left it. plus it was completely flat, not rolled up how it was. iknew it was my aunt and i just remember smiling.

i would never sleep in that room untill just recently. you couldnt get me near that room. but since so much time has passed i dont even care anymore.

anyhoo the whole reason i looked this up was bc i had a dream about my aunt last night. it was the first one in a LONG time. whats so strange is that it was 2 years ago last night that she died. FREAKY. she died the night of april 7 but since the time difference is a bit different then texas its the 8th bc it happened about 10 mins past midnight. i didnt even realize tho. like i thought yesterday was the 5 or 6 i didnt even know it was exactly 2 years.

what makes no sense to me is what my aunt said. she called me and she said we hafta meet up. and i was like? uhm excuse me your dead? how are you here your dead? and she was in a car and i heard a man in the background. i was liek whos that? and she told me that it was her boy friend. now this was very odd because my aunt was a lesbian. so i said to her, BOY FRIEND?? what do you mean boy friend. and she said thats how im here, its what i had to do to get here to see you. i didnt understand. when i told her she was dead she said dont worry about it. she was verry nonshalant too like a different attitude that ive never seen her posses before. anyhoo i dont think we ever even ended up meeting.

idk i just thought it was weird what she said. this dream was very real unlike any other dream ive ever had about her.

anywayss sorry for writing so much i just wanted to share and thought maybe some1 would be interestedd.

:]]


#23    theSOURCE

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Posted 09 April 2008 - 03:37 AM

Welcome to UM mushroom. original.gif

As to your story I have no comment.




#24    Missvalor

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 08:18 PM

My brother passed away on September 22 2006 , I dream about him all the time and visit the grave 2 times a month , before he died we argued and it broke my heart but he was so poorly not himself, he took his own life, since then I have felt that how I feel about his death doesn't matter I just think or try to think of those left behind, in my dreams he comes back to support me but the last dream broke my heart, I had a dream about dean his grave was empty but his headstone was there then i was talking to cathy the undertake and said when is his body being released shes like friday so when they get the body they say leah u really shouldnt see him i was like its my brother its been 6 years of course he wont look the same, then i said i want the body laid out at home then all of a sudden the body is laid out on my bed but he opens his eyes and said i just want a cuddle but he was going green and he felt like they do when they are emblmed so i freaked out and he just says please dont leave me at which time i was awoken by smashing downstairs me and mum shot down the stairs and see a shelf in the glasses cupboard had broke and a few glasses shattered, so we cleaned it back up we went back to bed and mum looked in my room not knowing anything and said leah it looks like someone is rolled up in your duvet at whcich point i just sobbed my heart out i couldnt breathe, i havent cried like that since i heard nan talk 5 days after she died , i have a gorilla beside my bed he bought me when i was 7 and when im struggling i always have a cuddle with him as its the closest thing i guess but i was so freaked out , and we keep smelling nan big time. I don't know what to make of it all but all I know is I wish I could bring him back





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