I was thinking this could be a hot thread in Um im sure there will be alot of opinions about this.
This may be applied more when talking about couples. I guess single ones can flirt as much as they want

If in a relationship, would you find it bad to flirt with other man/woman? or your partner to flirt with others?

Are there levels of flirting? Are some acceptable, and others not?

Any opinions?

I don't think theres anything wrong with flirting, its just attention without intention...but don't get caught though

When im in a relationship i dont flirt or look.... But when im not IM A FREEEEEEE MAN

i leave flirting to those who feel that they need to feel like life has a purpose

I belong to him and he belongs to me...he can flirt as much as he likes...i command him to make all woman feel like Goddesses.

I think all man would like a girlfriend with ur atitude

Yes...well...attitude usually comes second with men...half the time their brain simply serves as a translater for the nether regions to be thinking of things like attitude...i am lucky to have found an obediant one that can assimilate the two.

Sad...that made me smile

Your talking about us men!

All depends what you mean by flirting. I went to a pub with my husband, we both chat to people both same sex and opposite all the time, neither of us thinks we will do anything with anyone else, we are just being adult and friendly. However, one time I was chatting to a bloke at the bar and he took it wrong and thought I was flirting with him, he was a sad sap really, any attention any female gave to him, gave him the impression that they were after his body I think

That's good question.

I think it depends who your flirting with and why. some is harmless. some can cause problems. some do it for attention which isn't exactly good because what is missing out of you or your life that needs to still be filled ?

It's nice to be complimented but that isn't flirting. you can receive compliments without flirting with anyone.

* Flirts publically with Lt_Ripley *

I think flirting's fine when you're single. If you're in a relationship, then as long as both of you are fine with it, then it's also good.

It's only when it leads to other things that the trouble arises. If that happens, then it would have happened anyway, flirting or not.

If your an "open" person and able to talk with ANYONE or able to be complimentary; then sometimes that can be misinterpreted as flirting ((you know without the intent of flirting)).

But there also is a definite flirting as well which I think is just a human nature thing. If one is secure with themselves it really doesn't matter. Darn, I don't know if I'm makng sense anymore. Hmmm, as long as the flirting doesn't result in a true sexual encounter I guess I wouldn't mind... well I know I wouldn't; I've lived it.

I think flirting fits in a few different categories. There's courtesy flirting, for example, when one has a pleasant customer service experience. This means nothing and should have no impact upon one's intimate relationships. Playful flirting happens between friends of opposite gender around the same time they can comfortably tell one another dirty jokes without fearing sexual harassment litigation. Then there's sexual flirting, and it's unfortunate that the two prior examples are so often mistaken for it.

I'm especially fond of flirting that's not contrived. A woman's blush, shy grin, and brushing her hand past her ear is irresistible. If the reaction is forced or rehearsed in any way, I'm unaffected.

Pssshhhhh! Maybe if your a Mormon.

I think that sometimes flirting is okay. Such as a customer or a cashier is servicing you. A little flirting, i.e. smiles and eye contact (no checking them out if you are in a relationship), that makes them feel good about themselves, I think is okay. As long as you and your partner know there is nothing to it, it is fine. Many times, though just being nice, can be seen by the other person that you are flirting with them, but I guess that is even better because you didn't even know you were flirting, and still made that person feel good.

I... um...

never flirt

LMFAO------------>> okay that was a GOOD ONE GV!!!!!

There is a difference, though, between flirting, and
....

Flirting with intent.

IMO anyway.

Apparentley, according to my friends, I get the two confused a bit. Not that I notice.

But I think that it is ok to flirt et al, so long as nothing eventuates out of it.

I flirt'd with some one on UM She knows...

I get what your saying - in the past I have been accused of flirting* when in fact I hadn't been . Just because I have the ability to meet with someone and put them at ease and speak with them doesn't mean I'm flirting. It means I've learned how to be social and accommodating.

I'll flirt when I know I'm safe and it's harmless , but alot of times we aren't aware of what the other person is thinking. we may think it harmless but they may not. they may think they have a shot. can lead to hurt feelings.


* leading someone on.

It's ok, as long as it doesn't get outta hand and turn into something destructive...ruin a relationship.

i love it!

wish i could be tha way

My missus doesn't mind me flirting as long as I don't touch and only have sex with her. She won't even tolerate Internet sex with other women......

why would she tolerate that? I'm sure real sex is waywaywayayaywya better

Anukis why are you asking this question... j/w?

When i was younger i was way too shy to start any flirting, but as i got older and began to have more male friends there were a few that i could do a little harmless friendly flirting. But i always tried to communicate that it was light hearted fun! But i have seen when it,s taken wrong or someone goes too far and then it can get really ugly real fast! Flirting is something where not all the people always know where the bounderies are! You gotta be careful and be respectful,IMO!

Amen Swpt Amen!

i flirt with almost my female customers make them keep coming back.

That actually works

I use to do it with the guys who came into my old shop.
But now that I have moved, mainly my customers are cashed up middle aged men.
And seeing as I am selling sheets, I think that may not be the best thing to do.

Ick. Not thinking about it.

But anyway, it is kind of a given thing to do within the right areas. Harmless, and it gets the sales!

Winwin.

Then whats the point?

Perhaps I should have elaborated that a little bit more.

What I was referring to was that, when you are in a relationship with someone, it is unnaceptable to be flirting with intent with someone who is not your partner.

If you know what I mean.


But, otherwise, Primeval, I totally agree with you.
My bad.

Clarified.

IMO, if you're in a relationship, you shouldn't flirt with others. If you're single, then you can flirt all you want.

thats rrriighttt..!! except when your gf is in different city , eh ?

I love flirting and I am very good at it. I also encourage my husband to make all women feel wonderful and he does, too, same as nn said.

I guess that depends on whether you want to take your life in your hands or not! LOL I'm too possessive; I'd be checking up on the hubby to see what he's doing.

flirting is in the eye of the beholder

Im always the last to know when I'm being flirted with, let alone hit on.

I mean, "take off your clothes" can mean anything..

right?

Ummm maybe in the doctors office; or during a TSA strip search

I get accused of flirting a lot. Now, reading this thread, I can understand why. I never considered smiling, eye contact, and complimenting people to be flirting - just appropriate friendly behavior. I guess I should stare at my shoes and frown all the time, lest someone think I'm leading them on....

there is something wrong with it if you say "just don't get caught" if you are doing something your other half doesn't like, and you are being sneaky, it's dishonest and hurtful, and I don't see that being ok.

If that's how you feel, I think it's great, you have a lot of trust and I admire that you can feel that way without feeling insecure.

lol, yeah, I know how you feel, everyone used to tell me I was a total flirt ball, and I can honestly say, I don't flirt, I am picky when it comes to relationships and get stiff as a board when other people talk to me, and yet, smiling, hugging good-bye and looking in the eye of the speaker is very "risque" now a days. hahaha

Well Sea, actually it started out when i was chatting with a friend and we came upon the subject, and i thought i'd ask my UM buddies and see whats their opinion on the matter

My opinion on this is that flirting has levels. Some flirting is inapropriate and can ruin relationships, other types of flirting which are mild, like complimenting perhaps, and being nice in general, i think are harmless. The worst is flirting with intent, and of course physical touch... i dont think those could be accepted by anyone.

But yes as someone said flirting is preety much part of human nature. When you see someone which draws you, its almost natural to ''flirt'' even with a simple smile. I think it's all in the mind really, if a person is attractive to you, you will definetly flirt in a mild way, maybe with a smile, or alot of eye-contact, or blushing...but if u don't find the person attractive, the smile for you will only mean being cortious to that person.

So yeah, for me not all flirting is wrong, it depends on what the flirting is consisting in and what means to the person who's doing it.

Personally, no, I don't think flirting with others while in a relationship is okay, unless its either extremely sarcastic and/or both people in the relationship are alright with it.

(For the record, I only mean real flirting--I can't for the life of me really consider a smile as flirting )

I mean, ask yourself this question: would you be alright if your significant other was flirting with other people? If no, then why would you go around flirting and assume that they just have to get used to it? I do understand the struggle. I myself was a major flirt anytime I was single, to the point where meaningless flirting had become almost like a second language. But by now, I've been in a very serious relationship for some time, one I don't see ending and frankly, I don't feel any need to flirt when I have that important someone, a person that I actually love, to talk to everyday and really, really be myself around like I can't with anyone else.

Flirting is a lot of fun when you're single but once you're in a real relationship, the rewards are so much greater that I, at least, finally saw all that flirting for the shallow exercise that it really was.

Flirtings okay. But leading someone on??? Making them feel something they're NOT!! Now that REALLY SUCKS.

Hmm...I think that flirting doesn't mean the same for everyone. Some people can see flirting in a situation when others don't see it. It's interesting how people can perceive things in a different way...

I have to agree with Tarman Zombie about that when ur in love there is no need to flirt , but still i think that when a person sees a 'beautiful' hence an attractive person, it will come natural to smile to that person more than usual, to be more kind, to maybe be less confident around that person due to shyness, etc. This can be interpreted as a ''flirting'' by some, which is harmless cause it doesnt mean ur cheating on ur loved one or that u don't love ur partner anymore or disrispect. It's just the human behavioural reaction to the sight of an attractive person. I hope im explianing myself right... its a bit difficult to explain in words, maybe i find a video about human behaviour on you-tube

Agreed Anukis, i flirted with 'danger' many times...i think it's the rush that keeps me coming back. lol!