Man...way to pick a hard one...

Granted, but uh... uh... (pulls up wikipedia)...
....
....
Oh, hey, warp drives... yeah... granted, but an ancient alien race that thought they had exterminated the people of Earth long ago is waiting on the other side of the first jump. They come back to finish what they started millenniums ago...

I wish I had a really cool super power... (Give me something interesting )

Granted, but you are able to talk to lemons when underwater in a certain 1 foot deep kiddie pool filled with sewage.

Crazy huh?

I wish I could have a really cool super power.... better that the last one.

GRANTED!

You now have the power to turn ANYTHING you touch into Twinkies.

I wish it wasn't so hot here today.

Granted, You have the miraculous ability to die trying to save people... (sorry, felt like posting an evil one)

I wish I had a more complex vocabulary...

I also wish I knew how to spell vocabulary...

Granted, but you die. (that was an evil one)


I wish my friends weren't so stupid.

Granted. Your friends became much smarter and stopped hanging around with you.
I wish a mere, magical word would bring any woman I wanted to my bed.

Granted! The magic word is "fiddlesticks" but they'll all come running with warts on their noses! lol
I wish I had a remote controlled vacum cleaner so I could watch Gladiators and clean at the same time.

Granted but the suction's to powerful and accidently sucks up the carpet.

I wish I could fully stop smoking.

Granted, because you were on fire...
I wish I was on fire! (corrupt that!)

granted
but ur on fire metaphorically speaking in a game of pool xDD
I wish this thread wud stop XDD jk

Granted, but it only stopped for a couple hours. Then my turn came up.

I wish i had a fully equipped restaurant style kitchen.

Granted but Gord Ramsey buys you out...
I wish for a bowl of cheerios...

*Massive chuckles*



Granted! But you cant have them coz Im stealing them.
I Wish to snog Gordo Ramsey with a mouthful of cheerios!

Granted, but he spits em right into your face.

I wish I knew who this Gordo Ramsey guy was...

Granted, you get on the tv show Hell's Kitchen and meet him...and then he makes you leave before the commercial break because you're a sucky chef.

I wish I could make people's mouths dissappear when I wanted them to be quiet.

Great way to tell me who it is

Granted... but it reappears near your anus... man doesn't that make conversation awkward...

I wish I had just a little bit of work to do right now so my shift would stop dragging on.

-C

Granted but your boss comes in and tells you that he needs you to pull double shifts for the next 4 days straight.

I wish I could go back in time and headbutt Mozart in the solarplexus.

Granted, but Mozart turns out to be a titanium robot, and you end up with a huge concussion.
I wish it wasn't so hot right now.

Granted but it's like the ice age and now your freezing to death.

I wish I had a gourmet kitchen.

Granted, but you cant control your sweat, and Gordon Ramsay yells at you everytime you walk into there.
I wish my computer worked so I didnt have to go to the library to use the public ones with the odd keyboards/mouses.

Granted, it works again but they day you stopped going to the library the girl of your dreams walked in looking for you....


I wish for Pittsburgh to win game 6 and then go on to take the Stanley Cup.

Granted, but the Stanly cup is canceled.

I wish the Sharks had won the game against the stars

Granted,but the Sharks all fell into a giant pit of doom immediately after winning.

I wish nothing bad would ever happen to me again.

Granted, but you're going to spontaneously combust 1 second before it takes effect.

I wish Michael Jackson would just go away and never come back.

Granted, he found his way to your room and now will be out of the public eye.....
FOREVERRRR!


I wish I had a big, juicey steak.

Granted but it's come from an animal with mad cow disease!



I wish I had a way to clean AOL from my computer for good!

granted you do have a way,but i know how how and refuse to tell you.

i wish i was with my girl right now

Granted but it's only a 25 minute long conjugal visit

I wish someone didn't keep throwing away all my damn water bottles and making me buy new ones.

Granted but i've got the key to her chastity belt and i'll hand it over when you tell me how to get rid of AOL!


muddled my wish didnt get I I words up

Granted now you are living on a floating island of empty water bottles, with no new ones to drink.

I wish my house was already clean.

Granted, my girlfriend came over and cleaned it for you and in doing so rearranged all your belongings. Goodluck finding anything when you need it.
(She does this to my room ALL the time... it may look messy to her but when my cds are on the floor I can locate them quite easily)

I wish my HIDs that I ordered from Australia yesterday would arrive tomorrow.

Granted but they arrive and are confiscated by the flying monkeys that stole all of the little kids' homework.

I wish I had a better boy cousin...
Alex is AWFUL at being a cousin!

Granted but you fall in love with him. . .

I wish I had a greek pizza, that was piping hot out of the oven, and nothing gross happened to it.

Granted but I ate it...

I wish I had 2009 Chevy Camaro with all the extras.

Granted. Me no sabotage wish coz tis a nice car! You have been given a double blower and a massivly rocking cam to go with. All is well except your cluch is leaking.

I wish for a 427 Alloy for my now V6 Commodor!

pm me and ill trade you the aol info for the key,lmao

granted,but your comadore is stolen the next day,and you find out your insurance lapsed 2 days before:P

i wish hier would pm me so i get the key,lmao

Granted, but its the wrong one...
Wish for some cashews...

Granted. But they are mixed with Basil and Macadamia nut. Roasted, salted and sugur coated.

I wish to be laying on a beach in the shade drinking Tequila and Lime.

Granted, but that shade is being provided by a supercell that's rolling in quick and you're too drunk to move.

I wish I had a brand new Z06. (Mandalore's wish got my mouth watering)

Granted. But....... It came in Hot Pink! lol

I wish for the Tim Tam fella, and a big fat obbie of Greenjaman.

TimTam Lovers - TV Commercial
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkTFrwnL5eA

Granted, but you eat the whole box and find out that the chocolate was really sewage I mean, not chocolate.

I wish people would stop wishing car wishes.

Granted... Everybody starts wishing for things relating to pasta instead

I wish I had some Pasta

Granted, I made it.

I wish I could cook.

granted you can cook,but very bad food,lmao



i wish for the correct key

Granted,but it's in tiny chest without a key surrounded by giant scorpions.

I wish i was an Oscar Meyer Wiener!

Granted, but you are the first oscar meyer wiener ever made, so you are smelly, mouldy, and probably slimmy

I wish I were in cancun at casa torcesa and on my way to senior frogs

granted, but on the way there you get hit by a car, fly into the ocean, and slowly get ripped appart by:
seagulls, sharks, turtles, and surfing dudes

i wish i had some ice cream to eat

"granted, but on the way there you get hit by a car, fly into the ocean, and slowly get ripped appart by:
seagulls, sharks, turtles, and surfing dudes

i wish i had some ice cream to eat"

Granted. But you ate it to fast. Now you have a killer case of brain freeze.

I wish I had next weeks lotto numbers.

Granted, you have the numbers 1 - 60 written on a piece of paper. Technically you have them right?

I wish for a million scorpions, sting every pore of my body. Corrupt it.

Granted but it turns out to be just an LSD trip and they are really kittens snuggling you!

I wish all Mrs GH still looked like her wedding pictures! (Thats me dead when she reads this! )