granted but it breaks on the way there.
I wish we would find Osama bin Laden.

Granted, he is found to be a made up character, and the world now blames you for his actions.
I wish I did not need to eat, sleep or breathe, to live a healthy life.

Granted despite your amazing abilities you die in a car crash!
I wish the worlds best cook was my personal chef.

Granted, but he becomes pyscho

I wish i had a Mac.

granted, you now know someone named mac

i wish i had a cheese burger

Granted. You eat it, it's perhaps the juiciest greasiest tastiest burger you've ever had. Then you have a sudden quadruple heart attack and die.

I wish I could make people spontaneously combust at will.

Granted but you combust one day by accident

i wish i had 4 grand.

granted but you get mugged by a hobo

i wish i had $500

Granted, you get mugged by Jesus.

I wish there was a tree in my yard that grew Euros.

Granted, but as soon as it starts producing money the Euro depreciates to 1/100 it's current value.

I wish I had a Moog Old School Voyager.

Granted, but its been covered in chocolate...
I wish I could digest metal...

Granted, go ahead and gorge yourself on some titanium. But you then become the first human to learn that metal is extremely poisonous to humans for some reason or other.

I wish I could play saxophone as well as Dexter Gordon.

Granted, but only on sunday at 4:00am for 10 minutes.


Oops, forgot a wish... I wish for a free life time supply of gas.

Granted. You now fart endlessly and noone whats to be near you. But on the bright side OPEC wants you to join.

I wish it would rain.

Granted, but you drown in a puddle

i wish i didn't have to go visit my family this weekend.

granted,you have to visit your in laws

i wish for ................. uhm surprize me,something expensive,lol

Granted but you pay 100,000 for a gremiln.

I wish i had a decent cpu.

Granted, but it comes alive and eats your cat!

I wish I could go back to Germany on vacation.

Granted, but the plane you take runs out of gas, and you return home...
I wish for some more tequila...

Granted, more tequila... for ME! woo wooooooo

I wish for a lemon and salt to compliment my nice gift from pred.

granted but you get a cut and acadently poor it on you skin...btw you "cut" was your arm falling off

i wish i had a new movie

Granted, it's this one:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Witless_Protection

I wish I could speed up or slow down time at will.

Granted, you slow time down buuut yuuuuu ffffffforrrrrrrrgggeeeeetttttt hhhhhowwwww toooooooo ssssspeeeeeddd iiiiiiiittt bbbbbbaaaaaaackkkkkkkkkk uuuuuuuuuuuupppppp

I wish I had a dozen brewskis right now.

Granted, but they've gone rancid and they make you sick.

I wish I Could get enough money to finish buying off my house (my landlord is making me VERY angry)

Granted, but your landlord moves in with you permanently.

I wish the original Night Stalker had never been cancelled.

Granted it was never canceled... because it never aired to begin with.
I wish I had a job where I am paid $1000 a night to sleep eight hours.

Granted, but suddenly you develop insomnia. Unable to do your job, you are then fired.
I wish nothing but positive things happen to me and my loved ones for the rest of our very long lives.

Granted but you become incredibly bored and yearn for some sort of delima or excitement.

I wish every food I ate automatically had a tenth of the calories.

Granted but its a tenth of the calories of a ton of whale blubber!

I wish i had a wish that no one could corrupt!

Granted, but no matter what you try you'll never be able to post what that wish is.

I wish I got $1,000,000.00 richer every time I corrupted a wish in this thread.

Granted but you get taxed 200% when someone taxes your wish.

I wish I had enough money to pay for a live in nanny for my kids.

Granted, but the only one who'll take the job is Leonard John Fraser (sorry about that).

I wish my perfect soul mate would PM me here on this forum and eventually hook up with me and make me the happiest man on earth for the next 50 years.

Granted. But on your 50th anniversary she confesses that she was a man up until 10 days before she met you, and now she's planning on reclaiming her manhood.

I wish it wasn't so damn humid today.

granted but the sun burns a hole in the front of your pants in the middle of your day in a very populated area

i wish it was sunday so i caould sleep outside

Granted, and now that Sunday's here your outdoor sleep fest is invaded by a swarm of killer bees.

I wish a linear voltage to exponential current converter based on an LM13700 wasn't so damned flaky.

Granted but the power gets knocked out where you live for a month!
I wish I could have super powers!

Granted, but the only super power you have is to knock people unconscious with your nasty body odor.

I wish flip was flop.

Granted but everyone hates flop?(not following the wish )
I wish my car had 1500 hp

Granted, but only because it needs to be pulled by 1500 actual horses.

I wish I wasn't lonely.

Granted but now you have poparazzi constantly trying to get a photo of you and your mobbed every time you go out.
I wish nothing bad ever happend to me.

Granted, but you become so bored with your life that you take up sky diving without a parachute (a one time deal).

I wish I was the greatest comedian in the world.

Granted, but everyone who sees your show laughs himself to death, leaving you to be the last and only person left on this planet.
I wish I lived in a rainforest.

Granted, but you'll do so as an actual scorpion.

I wish the work on my basement was finished already.

granted but your basement fills up with water to the top step

i wish oil was cheap again

granted, but all the earth's oil equal 5 gallons of gas.

I wish for an encyclopedia of all the universes knowledge.

Granted, but since you hold all the worlds secrets word gets out and you get killed because the book is priceless.
I wish I could get through college in one year instead of four.

Granted ..but it is a college for clowns
I wish for peace on earth forever...

granted, but the sun explodes.

I wish for an idea to make me solve the problematic equation regarding quantum gravity.

Granted! But the earth losses Its gravity and it becomes irrelavant!

I wish for ummmm........ Tatter Tots! "he,he"

*waves to Biff*

Granted. The Tatter Tots are the best you ever had. But you end up with the runs for the next week.

I wish I had more beer.