I come to find
the world is blind
to the fact
that not only
are we strange
with minds not intact
with the breaking hearts of the lonely
and the filling hearts of the loved
the world lies in a mucus film
suffocating ones thoughts
and making them die alone
alone is such a powerful word
with it lies the absolute fact
that regardless of how many people are around
we are alone

free? nothing's free
Even thinking has a price
a thought changes someone
however minute it may be
but change makes ripples
ripples make waves
and waves take out cities
tell me a thought doesn't make an effect
if you do, you're a liar
and liars also have prices
for instance a lawyer

emotions are the blood of the planet
with them everything springs up
from thoughts to actions
actions to effects
love, hate, joy, sorrow, anger
these 5 emotions give rise and befall even the biggest civilizations
think about it
people kill for and die for love, and hate
joy for those victorious, sorrow for the defeated, and anger for those who live after defeat
it's a cycle
simple to a T
but is the price of feeling worth the pain of the end?

Those are really good poems. you have a deep sence of thing and thats awsome.

Thanks blue, This is just what goes on in my head every day, I have a thought and from it I kind of overanalyze...

I really like it

Thanks, I have written a few more, but these are my oldest... This will be my poetry thread, hopefully everyone enjoys what goes on in my thought processes(sp?) I'll write more when I've got more acess to a computer...

I for one would like to read more of them. When you get a chance that is.

Well written Nanankix
awesome cadence
most descriptive and great depth

OK. Well I love the spoken word feel to them because they flow so well. The second poem was full of a rising crescendos in each stanza. The contrasts that play on each other all good. Exotic is very lovely though to me and I bet you took so much time composing that. I can tell because it uses some of the techniques I try to incorporate within my poems at times but I see you have mastered it the first time. I can see clearly in the first three stanzas that whatever is on the first and second line of each is repeated systematically so they are all comparisons. Keeping with the formula whatever is one the third and fourth lines are all connected and so forth. The use of contrasts here again is great. The last stanza while breaking away from the formula not only accents the first three but is like the bullet of a gun charing out the barrel. The first stanza can then be seen as the trigger pull, the second the hammer cocking, and the third the impact, but the last really ties it all up nicely. Excellent word crafting.

Thanks Clovis! In all actuality though, I wrote the poem as if I was talking, I don't know if it's uncommon, or unorthodox, to do so. But, I wright from all the emotions I gather through the day, because I'm in the army, I thought it was a proper tribute to those soldiers who are overseas.
I can only imagine what they're feeling every day, and even though some of them may not have a computer, or know where the sites are, that I've posted this poem (I am kinda proud about Exotic) It's still there, and if they just happensake across this, I want them to know that there's support EVERYWHERE. When I write anything, I think of how my words flow with my thoughts, if it doesn't flow, then I think of alternatives, and thus makes me more linguistically eloquent(sp?). I do have slight dyslexic moments where I forget how to spell some words (usually the long ones), but when I post, I keep track of the words, I am not sure of and edit them so I know they're correct.

I DO thank everyone who has read my poems and liked them, It's kinda nice to know that there are people who do appreciate things like written poetry, lyrics, lymericks (the short stories that are usually funny) and plain old spoken verse. I am also willing to do comissions, free of charge (mainly because I'm too lazy to set up pay pal, and I feel that language is free anyway.)

broken tears
amongst the faded skies
falling ever so gently from grace
to kiss the face of the ground
innocence fading from the children so soon
seems like yesterday they'd play in the afternoon
now they think of sex and toys
all from those much older boys
my sister is getting that way
if I find out she's had sex before graduating
I'll kill that "boy" with my bare hands
chop off his "toy" and put it on a spick
this serves as a warning for those who mess with my family
touch my sisters, I'll kill you.
death isn't the end mind you, just the ending of an era to make way for a new.
(sorry, kinda violent I know, but this guy that my sister likes is one of those "wiggers" I want to pull his pants up so high it cuts him a new asscrack.)

*here is a riddle*
2 legs sit on 4 legs
while holding 1 leg in 2 legs lap
4 legs jump up and grap 1 leg from 2 legs
2 legs jump down and grab 4 legs to get 1 leg back
What is the situation described?

Most excellent!

Wow they are really full of feeling

Traveling so far away
trying to find my inner place
inside I'm afraid
outside I show no fear
uncertainty only makes it worse
and yet I'm at peace with that
saying good bye to my friends
it's only a week
but it seems like the end
the end of something I've worked so hard to keep out of my life,
and as everything clears, it'll only show who my true friends are.

Buffalo, Minnesota here I come
hopefully I won't be undone
by the paperwork I must endure
and the headaches
OH GOD THE HEADACHES
so impure
I'll be gone for a bit
please don't be mad about it
I'll be back soon enough
and I'll write about what I've done there
of course it will be in verse
otherwise it would be perverse
I'll be back on friday though,
but I'll post on saturday so...
be patient for me
I'll be back you'll see

This is goodbye for a week
try not to look so meek
I know my style has gon to the pits, but try to make the most of it.
later people love you all
god bless
forgive my mess

(did anyone get my riddle yet?)

Let me guess, your on a trip for a week? And you'll miss us?

CORRECT-A-MUNDO! I just found out that the place where I'm at has internet. (appearantly most hotels and inns do now) so, I'll try to keep you posted! MN is BEAUTIFUL! if I had a camera, I'd take pics and put them on my blog. but right now, I'm waiting for the breakfast to be served... appearantly I wake up too early... : /

it seems to me now that my world is crashing down upon me
and shattering beneath my feet
I'm losing faith and gaining a new horrible perspective on what love really is
Is it so hard to accept me for love?
or am I just not good enough to be happy?
I feel old, although I'm very young
I feel feeble but I'm still very strong
I'm losing face in the presence of life
Time is slipping through my fingers like sand
and I'm on a rollercoaster trying to find a way off
yes, my friends, the world is crashing down upon me
and I think it wishes to kill me
I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders
I feel it breaking apart beneath my feet
I know that this is the end for now
yet it's hard for me to accept defeat
I'll keep standing on what little ground I have left
and I'll do what I can to keep afloat
Don't you worry, I'll still be here forever
and I'll keep my post safe for you
but all I ever really want to hear you say
is "I love you"

Oh nature. By the way nan you still coming online?

Yep, I'm still coming online. Perhaps my thread is dying?

OMG. That is one awesome poem! Very well placed together.
Your cadence is perfect with rhyme.

Thanks Crimson. Right now I'm kinda lacking inspiration, and it's making me lose my mind, I WANT TO WRITE MORE, but I'm brain dead right now...