One Mother seems to be doing her job, although I don't know If I would be able to do it to my kid.


http://www.parentdish.com/2008/06/03/mom-g...8560x1200130643

http://www.fox16.com/news/local/story.aspx...cd-3045c3b651af

That mother is an idiot. You don't publicly humiliate your child. You shouldn't be hurting your child's feelings. He apologized and is going to cut grass which is enough. That mother is a moron, she just wanted public attention most likely.

Sounds like good punishment to me. Being a bully is not something to be taken casually. It is a serious issue. When I was in HS one the the school bullies ended up being shot, because he picked on the wrong kid.

The damage that can be done by bullies can be enormous.

Yeah... Because those that bully really DO have a change of heart when they apologize...

-Snap back to reality-

Good on the mother. 'Least someone has balls to tell their own kids off, and making sure they ain't gonna do it again. Or, if they do they know what'd come next.

How can you think bullying is the solution to bullying? This type of behavior particularly bothers me when an individual believes they are being just and righteous in their actions.

I hope the mother gets her just deserts when her son's psychologist bullies her bank account.

So according to you any type of punishment could be called bullying. I can't stand bullies and it's nice to see a bully fell what his victims have feet in the past. Intimidated and embarrased right on mom....

Good for the mom. I mean being publicy humilating him should be enough. Enough for him to stop bullying and it should.

If that my kid I would publicy humilate him too.

You just seem happy to see an individual scapegoated for these actions, does it really make you feel any better about the times you may have been bullied? I don't mean to offend but such an attitude seems rather sadistic, to wish that kind of experience upon someone.

I wouldn't call any form of punishment bullying (such as the original punishment recommended by the school), rather this particular one which aims to use the mothers control over this child to exactly as you have said 'intimidate and embarrass' the very qualities in this boys actions which seem to have characterized him in such a repulsive light as a 'bully'.

I don't mean to get on my high horse but this is something I feel rather strongly about, this forum seems to be filled with the ignorant notion that the more than dated 'eye for an eye' mentality is an acceptable practice.

I think this is good on the mom's part. He wouldn't have learned **** from just mowing the lawn. Mom did the right thing to step in and curb this behavior early. Public humiliation in this case being a public admittal to what he did. I don't think there's anything wrong with that at all. This will stick out in this kid's mind much more than an afternoon of grass cutting would.

Someone should just beat the **** out of him.

lmao, or there's that option... but that would much more worthy of Affliction's arguement

Scapegoated ? the kid admited to stealing an i-pod from another student he wasn't scapegoated by any means. I feel the punishment was perfect, now the kid knows what it feels like.

So you feel that the scool is more responsible for punishing someones child ? He broke the schools rule and his mother's rule so he should be punished for both, period. Leaving the school responsible for punishing your child is rediculous to say the least. Me sadistic, eh sure why not

By scapegoated I just meant that you (as well as many of the others who have replied) seem rather satisfied in the event itself of seeing someone punished for bullying.

I'm not bothered about the fact that the mother chose to punish her child, I'm bothered by the way in which she chose to do this, I certainly couldn't do this to anyone with a clean conscience.

Actually we don't know if this is the first time the kid bullied someone, or just the first time he got caught...If it wasn't the first time, then the mother had every right to humiliate him and make him think about what he did. We don't know if he did it before, or if other punishment was given and didn't work...But either way, the mother thought what she did was right, and noone knows the kid better than his mom....

Thats the thing with bullies, they do it to make themselves feel more important so I would have to think that this kid was a habitual bullie. I still stand by my original post. Good on the mom

Yes, it's good he got punished for bullying... are you assuming that anyone who feels this way was bullied as a child and is therefore pleased to hear about this due to some long-time, inner vendetta against bullies?


So you think he will have psychological issues from this or something? Why?

No I'm not saying this is true of everyone just that this may be a contributing factor towards the way some people feel about this, as in my experience normally when someone has a strong dislike towards a particular group of people they have normally had negative experiences with these people in the past or have a fear of these people. As it was said, we don't know whether this is part of a pattern of behavior or just an isolated incident, the punishment seems rather extreme to me and I would assume you'd have to have some kind of emotional hostility towards this person to think a punishment like this is appropriate and with the little information given in this individual in this article, I can't imagine why one could develop such strong feelings about the character of this child to think that this kind of elaborate display is warranted.


Well I couldn't say for sure either way but I could see how this has the potential to turn into a traumatic experience (the reference to the psychologist was mainly a joke). Not to mention the mother is sending him the message through her actions that it's all right to treat people this way, which I certainly believe it isn't.

I guess I just saw it as a mother forcing her son to take responsibility for his actions.

We don't know if it was a pattern or not, but I'm willing to bet it won't turn into one now.

Personally, I don't hold any emotional hostility towards this kid and I actually feel good for him because he will learn a good lesson from this overall. Lessons aren't always easy to learn, better now this way from his mother than from someone he tries to rob in the future.

But I'm outta here, have a good weekend man.

Boo ya. A bully turns into a bad adult.

Okay boys and girls..time to post for real.

The psychological effect of the degrading of the boy on a public level is not what I would call fair punishment. Sure he took a Ipod and belittled the other boy. It is not right to do that to him, yes. But making him go on an intersection with a sign with his transgressions would be humiliating to the highest degree. Let me see, I bet this mother was religious as well, and that if he didn't take the proper action to repent, he would go to hell. Sheesh, what a ball of crazy.

Our actions are often reflections on our upbringing. Even if he was doing it to look "cool", if his mother had taken the time and the responsibility to teach the kid the outcome of negative actions, he would not have done crap. The kid was a total *** to another kid, sure. But also, the mom was an *** to the kid by putting him in the middle of a INTERSECTION! She is basically punishing the kid for mimicking her demeanor. What a contradictory mother figure. Where's the banhammer?

- D.

I don't remember the name of the Judge, but there was one who did this and it worked quite well

I think it's an excellent punishment. more parents should implement it . ashamed ? yes well being a bully is a shameful ( and actually cowardly) act .

I know some are complaining about the psychological effect . Yet it is shame of being thought of as a thief , bully , hood , ect ...... years ago that kept our neighborhoods safer. that kept kids in schools.

How many here were raised in this example -- when I was a kid and was caught by a neighbor doing something I shouldn't have I got in trouble twice. Once from the neighbor who yelled at me and I felt ashamed and when I went home and got grounded and spanked. And what harm did it do ?? none. but it made sure I didn't do it again. ( fyi we were playing hide and seek tag and hid in a neighbors garden , ruining a few plants. )

I'm sure as an adult this kid will realize what a good job his mother has done with him instead of like most who just let the school handle it.

ps - for the one's who grow up psychologically effected ........ probably would have been effected had it happened or not. Most kids/people grow up with similar punishment and are fine.

an apology out of a kid nowadays for the most part means nothing. no lasting effect . most are just sorry they got caught. and it didn't dawn on this bully that he was hurting someone else's feelings . that mother isn't a moron - she's right. Her son was the moron. hopefully this will teach him a lesson so the next time he feels the urge to be a moron he'll think twice.

HAHAHA, brilliant. That'll teach the stupid kid.

I think the kid has enough humiliation with that first name of his.

So the kid gets totally humiliated and what? stops picking on other people to make himself feel 'bigger?" Or he gets so embarassed that he becomes really introverted and other people pick on him.

What happened to making the punishment fit the crime? First of all, the grass cutting has NOTHING to do with picking on a kid or stealing an iPod. He didn't do anything to the grass or the school, did he?

Wearing a sign and ringing a bell doesn't have anything to do with it either.

How about apologizing to the boy (and I don't mean a grumbled, "sorry" while he stares at his shoes - how about taking them both out for pizza and getting them talking? Ya know, so the kid LEARNS HOW to act instead of just instilling fear about how he shouldn't act), giving back the iPod, and then being put in lockdown in a pseudo-jail situation at home. Have the kid look up the jail sentence for theft and then make him serve it at home.

How about parenting to begin with? If my son was made to walk up and down ringing a bell with a sign that said, "I'm a theif," or whatever, I would be ashamed of my lack of parenting skills.

I disagree. I have kids. I find nothing wrong with it. Bullying can cause some kids to commit suicide. Whatever it takes should be the motto. I am tired of children not having to take resposiblity for their horrible actions.

I agree! I was not suggesting the kid not have to take responsibility for his actions.

I'm just more interested in teaching kids the RIGHT way to act rather than just punishing them for the WRONG.

But, I think this:


punishment makes sense.

It's just easier to make your kid march around with a sign for a week or whatever than engage in a long-term campaign to change his behavior.

he may think, if this is the worst punishment i get he might just do it again. he needs real PUNISHMENT!!! MAKE HIM WORK, that will ruin his spirit and sell worth bit hard maybe??????

Do people not realize the consequences that bullying has on kids? School shootings ring a bell? - mass murderers on the sole account of bullying. Teachers, and students are even scared to go to school on that reason alone--- Teachers are (in fact) getting licences to carry weapons to their jobs- on school grounds out of fear of these bullies. & in turn we have the underdog students carrying weapons to school in defense.. will it end?? This way, do we, are we solving this major problem??
The laws are so messed up that any form of deterring discipline is considered "illegal." Their hands (school authorities) are often tied-- Come on People! It starts at home, by God, it should stop there.

I say ^^ to that momma!!

* adding, if the punk needs any counseling at all from his "trauma" I bet you this-- It doesn't even compare to the counseling needed for those he's picked on, bullied around--

he's lucky he's not mine, I'd probably do more than just give him a bell and a poster board.. more like ringing that bell of his, while whooping his *** with a board.

There are more suitable punishments than those of publicly humiliating the kid. Communication is imperative when raising a child...It seems the mother didn't talk to him. Instead, when the kid messed up, she throws him in an intersection? Oh, that's completely sane. SARCASM No positive or negative reenforcement seems to be there. It is like saying, " If you do it again, next time..you'll be in a clown outfit."

You all rant about bullying, and killing. I am a teenager, I know what is is like. You all have been there once, so you do as well. But talking about it helps to prevent it. "Let her do it. The kid is going to make another kid come to school with a shotgun." God, please stop stereotyping every teen as a psychologically messed up crack. Not every teen will come to a school with a gun when bullied. You are all adults. You need to actually contribute to prevent it if the situation is as intricate as you suggest it to be.

some kids are bullies no matter how good their parents are. some kids are bullies because they are spoiled rotten and have always gotten their way and expect to do so outside of the home. some are bullies because of a pecking order at home with siblings and some are because they are abused and lash out. some are because their parents are ..... and some are just bullies.

now , wait til you have kids that act one way at home and another at school and despite all your talking and time outs could care less. when you've torn out your hair because you've found coddling them isn't getting you any respect and you feel the end of your rope .... remember this story. Unless your one of the few lucky ones who have kids that won't get into trouble and if they do listen to the Ward and June Cleaver school of lectures. ( and even they hit ) But your still a kid. and view it as such.

Hey a clown outfit may work better. What would you do if you had a kid who was a bully who dispite your talks and his apologies kept up the same behaviour ? kept it up through all the creative parenting skills nowadays? Oh a good kid at home and not really a bad one in school , except has no respect for anyone and bullies them . And this is easy compared to other problems parents have.

so what would you do ?? really . and let's assume you've already tried talking , grounding and taking away the x box.


“Bullies are always cowards at heart and may be credited with a pretty safe instinct in scenting their prey.”

Anna Julia Cooper (American Teacher and Writer, 1858-1964)

maybe the answer is to find a tougher bully.

Maybe drayno your looking at this from a youngsters perpective . try too look it at it from a mothers point of view .

Maybe she was genuinlly worried that her son would end up as another statistic . We hear so much these days on the news about kids killing each other . carrying weapons .hanging themselves and such . Its scary for parents to watch this stuff and know that it could happen to theirs . Of course parents (well most including me ) talk to our kids and teach them right from wrong . but how many kids do you know that go off the rails from time too time and do silly things still. often due too peer pressure . or wanting soemthing that they can't have . to think all kids can do no wrong if treated correctly by their parents is incorrect. My father would sit for hours talking to me when i was a kid . what was right what was wrong . how to treat others etc etc . but i still had my moments and it wasnt because of a lack of respect for him or others . Its because i was young and young people make mistakes . as do parents as well .

The trouble is in the news lately we will get such stories as kid dies from hanging after being bullied and what do we hear . " where were the parents . what were they doing ". This mother takes an active role in showing her son . that it wont be tolerated and he will have to face consequences that he doesnt like and she gets slated for it . So what do you suggest she should have done . grounding them doesnt always work . i know it didn't for me . a good talking too. Too a teenager is usually in one ear and out the other . a slap ? what ?

I would have once probably thought this was the wrong tack when i was younger as being embarassed by your parents is one of the worst thing imaginable at that age . but now i look back on those moments and know they did me good. I look back and i sometimes cringe but laugh at the same time because i know i never did it again. and thats it. you have too do what works. not because you want too show your kid up or make them feel small . or make yourself feel better but because you are the parent and you have to keep them and other kids safe at all costs .

So would i do this too my child in the same situation .hmm if other things hadn't worked and they hadnt learnt the lesson i would consider it . It definitly wouldn't be an easy decision and would likely break my heart but if i was afraid for their safety, I would likely do everything within my power .

Just my opinion . SS79

Most of us have been teens, I'm almost sure of it.. So, we can talk about it.
The fact remains, that there have been KIDS WHO BRING GUNS to school on the count of "bullying!" The fact remains, there have been kids shot in school shootings as a direct result from one who'd been bullied. It's out there. It's real, and it's happening. The true humiliation felt here is not by the bully, but the one he bullied. - Let's not even begin to go into those who commit suicide on the account of being bullied at school.

Wow, I love the fact that you bombard me with three moderately long posts before I can even respond.

As young as I am, I have looked from a parental point of view. As I stated on my old signature, "See everyones perspective before you judge them." To me, I understand the un-persisting violence claims lives. I have had peers who I have befriended shot and killed thanks to the violence. So I would not dismiss my opinion strictly as a kid who is testing out because he doesn't like to have his X-box taken away as well. I have personally watched as it dragged its victims and took them away, and I have been the victim in some of those sequences. When you all were children, I imagine it wasn't as bad as it was now. But since your children do imagine it, you have an idea.

During this day and age, violence is commonly associated with almost everything. Impressionable people are guided into accepting it into their daily lives. This really bothers me, so I know it does bother you. I am not blaming television and movies for the bullying, but often the bullying is because of personal problems that are not acknowledged. There are so many reasons.





Me? I would take away all distractions. The computer, the television, the phone, and the items that would entertain them. I would get them to understand the negative effect of putting people down, not matter how long it would take. Classes, groups, anything that would make them understand. Of course it wouldn't be some Leave it to Beaver bull walk in the park. But in the long run, it would be completely worth it for them.

Good on the mum.
Taking away privledges is nothing, kids don't live in the long term, by humiliating this kid the mother has made very clear what the consequences are right now, and I'm sure he won't forget the experience any time soon.
I'm not saying that every parent should humiliate their child if they do something wrong, but what this kid was fairly serious. Stealing and harrasment, which are very serious in the adult world, why not get this kid out of this kind of behaviour early on and prevent him from going down a path which could potentially wreck his life.

Taking away privileges to an extent affects them. But, actually guiding them whether they like it or not is more what I feel is best. His mom probably doesn't pay attention to him to he acts out. Or she has a effect on him and he translates that to the teenage logic. Which probably makes him subject of claims of entitlement to bash others...thanks to his thought process. This guy is a teenager..he is pretty close to adulthood. I only have about three years until I am legally an adult. If she had seen the world seven or eight years ago, it was getting worse...so it would have made sense to impress positive morals upon him then.

I certainly feel for the mother.....I would be devastated if any of my kids bullied a classmate and stole/took their Ipod or anything else for that matter.....

If she feels that this is the only way for him to learn from this experience, who are we to argue ?? He's her child and she knows best....

Personally, I wouldn't be able to do something like this.....I like the idea of him having to mow the school's lawn and I would also have my child 'pay' for their 'crime' literally.....He/she would have to buy the classmate a new Ipod out of their own pocket money and also personally apologise to him/her and the family......

That's what I would do and lets hope I never have to.....

Sounds like some thing my Mother would do. She would make you put on a T-shirt that said bully as you mowed the school lawn. Then she would bring it up everyday for the whole summer. No I would have never done anything like that when I was a kid my Mother had no compulsions about humiliating us kids in public if we acted up. I think the way she saw it is if were going to humiliate her by our actions, turn around is fair play. I would have done the same thing to my kid. Kida have to be aware of there are consequences to what they do. When they become adults that bull will land them in jail.

exactly , turn around is fair play. My mom didn't embarrass us ( we were pretty good kids but that's because we had a belt to face if we stepped out of line. so we thought about the consequences before hand that would come from her husband. With her we knew we could get away with crap)

Now my gran ? she brought out the belt very seldom instead she would cry and that stopped us. ( she helped raise us) but she was the one who humiliated . She would if you were with her as she talked to neighbors or grocery shopping or church would tell all she spoke to in front of you what you had done. After being chastised over and over again you learned your lesson fast. Taking things away from us never worked as a deterrent because we didn't have much so it didn't matter. And kids for the most part are in one ear and out the other . They push boundaries . as most do.

Bullying is also something that needs to be stopped in its tracks. Too often I think the parents of children who bully either don't know or do not care, and nothing is done in the home about the situation. Bullying is something that affects the victims very thoroughly if repeated (depending on the child). It's not a civilized behavior. This mother was thinking about the victim, as well as her son.

Not to say no one else here adressed that

you have no idea

You do not expose children to community harassment and retribution.
I know a principle who thought otherwise and she let out the names of some children who were involved in an incident, who were sent to alternative school and were to receive therapy.
The amount of harassment and BULLYING they received from the community caused all but one of the families to leave. The one family that did not leave and told their son he deserved it, that child committed suicide.

She retired the following year as principle and she will now have to carry with her for the rest of her life the knowledge of the consequences of her actions. There is a lot more to the story, including her harassing kids still at the regular school who had been friends with the boys.

My personal opinion is that if this mother is anything like that principle, which I suspect she is, then the whole stunt was not for her son's benefit, but really for herself, how other community members viewed her competency because the incident ever took place, and an attempt to retrieve a higher position again in their eyes which she perceived as damaged due to the child's actions.

To each their own. This mother saw this as the appropriate solution. Her intent can only be guessed unless someone here knows her personally. If it works, who's to say she's wrong for it.

If the kid's going to bully and steal from his peers, doesn't it make sense that the punishment involves humilation for treating another person that way? He'll learn that his actions have consequences; for himself and other people. It's a respect issue.. you get what you give.

I'll just say that kid is lucky I'm not his mom!
He'd be happy to parade up and down the street with a sign, when I got through with him.
(And no, I'm not talking about hitting him.)
I've got 3 boys, ages 20,19 and 15, raising children is hard work, there's so much bad stuff out there that they have to learn to deal with, and it's my responsibility to help them with their choices until they are responsible enough to make those choices on their own.

Parents need to be responsible for raising their children, and raising them to respect other people and other people's property.
On the one side you have the people who only see the bullying thief's side of it, and on the other side you have the people who see what this bullying thief will become, if he's not stopped now.

If what this mother did, stops this one boy in his tracks and makes him understand that there are consequenses (that he really really doesn't like) for his actions, then kudos to her. If it takes public humiliation to straighten out his view of the world, then so be it.
Most parents nowdays, would have hired a lawyer to fight the "mowing the school yard" punishment.

yeah i think thats a bit severe....

imo only a fool would do that to their own child as a form of punishment. Public humiliation for a child is quite cruel imo, and for the parent to even think of it how she did, shows me what kind of parent she is. So I'm not really surprised that someone who would dish out such a punishment has a bullying problem in the first place.

I also think its not just kids who bully you know.. most of the time I think its older people who do it, and its just something the children learn from them. I mean look around.. Sure some.. parents(or older ppl) might not steal an eyepod, but some steal other things you know.. and act in ways that are far worse in regards to other peoples feelings. It's just that they dont tend to see it when they do it(or care).. they only notice it when a younger person does it(because younger ppl are more obvious kinda). And I guess after time the young only learn to not be as obvious..




I agree.

Bravo Mom, If she did nothing and this kid repeated his behavior and hurt someone severely this time then the screams would be "where were his parents". Agree or not at least she is taking an active part in an attempt to head off bad behavior. Besides this child is not being hurt for life, PLEASE!!!!! Maybe just maybe the next time he is tempted to act in this manor he will remember how it felt to be humiliated like the victim of his bullying. Once again BRAVO Mom.

One word: Owned.

Anyway, he deserved it. Parents are too soft these days.

I think if parents did their jobs correctly in the first place, they wouldnt even be needing to think of punishments for bad behaviour. So imo when you punish a child, its because you didnt teach them correctly in the first place.