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Unexplained Mysteries Discussion Forums > Other > General Off-Topic Discussion > Jokes & Humour
Althalus
1. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

3. Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering, "Shut up dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!"

4. Whistle the first 7 notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

5. Sell Girl Scout Cookies.

6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

7. Shave.

8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask, "Got enough air in there?"

9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper, "Ever had a wet willy?"

13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral."

14. One word: Flatulence!

15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

16. Do Tai Chi exercises.

17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on."

18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"

19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.

20. Meow occasionally.

21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

22. Frown and mutter, "Gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say, "oops!"

23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

24. Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.

25. Holler, "Chutes away!!" whenever the elevator descends.

26. Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.

27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

28. Burp, then say, "Mmmmm.....tasty!"

29. Leave a box between the doors.

30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

31. Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.

32. Start a sing-along.

33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"

34. Play the accordion.

35. Shadow box.

36. Say, "Ding!" at each floor.

37. Lean against the button panel.

38. Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red buttons.

39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

41. Bring a chair along.

42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf??"

43. Blow spit bubbles.

44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

45. Make race car noises when people get on and off.

46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

48. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.

49. Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."

50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD TOUCH!"
Kismit
HaHaHaHaHaHa
I had a freind who did Numbers 12 and 16 I,m gonna give 17 a go next time i have the chance .
I had another freind who allways did Number 31 elevator or not.
Another one who could do 21 and whats wrong with 36
*Ding*
Another Interesting thing to try If you are brave enough is to stand at the front of the elevator and stare at the back wall..............you would be suprised how many of the passengers will turn around :0)
Ronin6th
I really enjoyed those suggestions!

Next time in an elevator I will try some of these!
Kira
:s2 :s2 :s2 :sj
Deathsythe Hell
:s2 lmao
that's some funny sh*t
dalia
Too funny!

I'd never have the nerve in such a confined space, hehehe.

Dalia :s2
Dr.Brain
Seems like you did entertain me .... :s3
Halo_Jones
Blimey Mr Brained oh sorry Rap King of Science, Your going to wear out that Angry Blue smilie soon!!Try this one :so Much Better :D

:s2 :s2 @ lift jokes
Dr.Brain
That was not so good joke.... :so ...oops...
Halo_Jones
:sl :sk :s2 :s2 :so Dr Brain your a sweetie really :s1
Kismit
Aww Dr. Brain even made me smile . You are way to young to be that sinical all the time.
Dr.Brain
You people are really funny creatures...... :s3
Krissa
24 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator...

1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

4. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, no, not now, damn motion sickness!"

11. Meow occasionally.

12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.

18. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.

24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on

doomgirl
QUOTE
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."


Yes our host body really isn't to our liking we must find a new one asap laugh.gif laugh.gif
smallpackage
these are great! grin2.gif


QUOTE
1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"


Already done it...

QUOTE
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.


done it...


QUOTE
11. Meow occasionally.
ambyglam
u forgot to mention...... pass wind!

loll

ph34r.gif
smallpackage
QUOTE (ambyglam1 @ Mar 3 2004, 01:37 AM)
u forgot to mention...... pass wind!

loll

ph34r.gif

dont forget about licking your fingers wacko.gif
doomgirl
pass wind wacko.gif huh.gif, that is all my boy toy does, don't matter where we are disgust.gif can't take him anywhere blink.gif
Spartan
Never have sex in a elevator,, wub.gif
I once got busted at night ,i thought there was no one there,,guess what,,,the security ,whom by the way are my friends now, laugh.gif
have got the whole blody thing on tape,haha thumbsup.gif
zygon
ive opened my bag in school and asked 'got enough air in there' a few people looked at me oddly
and i've dont the smacking your head saying 'shut up' etc one in school aswell as quite a few other odd things
Kazi
Fun to do in elevators
Fun Things to Do in an Elevator


1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.


2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.


3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"


4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.


5.Sell Girl Scout cookies.


6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.


7. Shave.


8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"


9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.


10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.


11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.


12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"


13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.


14. One word: Flatulence!


15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.


16. Do Tai Chi exercises.


17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"


18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, motion sickness!"


19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.


20. Meow occassionally.


21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.


22. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.


23. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.


24. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.


25. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.


26. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.


27. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"


28. Leave a box between the doors.


29. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.


30. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.


31. Start a sing-along.


32. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"


33. Play the harmonica.


34. Shadow box.


35. Say "Ding!" at each floor.


36. Lean against the button panel.


37. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.


38. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.


39. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."


40. Bring a chair along.


41. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"


42. Blow spit bubbles.


43. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.


44. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."


45. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.


46. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.


47. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.


48. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."


49. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
tendo
QUOTE
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on."


LOVE this one!! w00t.gif

once, in a walmart, there was an announcement on the speakers, and i hit my knees and pulled my hair, and yelled 'NO! NOT THE VOICES AGAIN!!!' grin2.gif
Nordic_Dragon
QUOTE (tendo @ Jul 10 2004, 02:20 PM)
once, in a walmart, there was an announcement on the speakers, and i hit my knees and pulled my hair, and yelled 'NO! NOT THE VOICES AGAIN!!!' grin2.gif

lmao! laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

11. Meow occasionally. - lol, my friend does that often! laugh.gif
Pyro Pheenix
when me and one of my friends was in perth he stood behind someone in the elevator and kept making popping noises in their ear. the other guy went brick red. it was hell funny laugh.gif .

not long ago i made a list of things to do to people over the phone. one of them was to ring someone up and as soon as they answer drop the phone and scream "it's alive!" grin2.gif
Great Big Sea
I loved the first one!
QUOTE
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask, Got enough air in there?
Ha! Ahhm I really should send these to my friends!
Britannica
laugh.gif laugh.gif
loved those! Must do at least one of them.
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