one of my favorite things about 50s science fiction and horror movies is their insane ideas of logic and the world at large. i thought it'd be funny if there was a thread where people put in real (from movies) or made up (from the wacky brains) examples of those beautiful 50's movie facts.

i'll start it up (probably a good idea, what with my starting the thread and all).

-if a planet has gravity, that means there is a safe and breathable atmosphere, even if it's right beside a sun.

-aliens can make men pregnant just because. (from "Night of the Blood Beast")

-if you put "ium" at the end of any word, it is a real element and is tougher than anything yet discovered. examples: couchium, guinnesium, winnabegonium.

-there are two types of scientists: young, chiseled-chin former football stars, and crazy yet lovable old men. the only women allowed must be buxom blondes who don't really know what they're doing and are very excitable.

-aliens generally want only a few things from earth: women, gold, death to all humans.

-the majority of aliens not only speak english (or what have you), but usually better then most people from the area they land.

-Even the smallest amount of Radiation can mutate insects into Giant Bloodthirsty Terrors.

- Any use of drugs or alcohol instantly turns you into a degenerate little better than a cave-man.

- Any random teenager posesses more problem solving skills than all the scientists, militaries and governments in the world combined..

- A visit to a popular make-out spot guarantees instant death..

- If you run out of bullets while shooting, don't reload. Stare at your gun for a second and then throw it at your target. Because hey, if 20 bullets didn't stop whatever you're firing at a half pound of metal might..

- Any scientist at all can reanimate the dead. Try it,it's easy!!

- Any lame idea for taking over the world would easily suceed if it were'nt for one square-jawed, ruggedly handsome guy with a crew cut..

- Death-rays ALWAYS misfire, explode or fail to work. Don't even bother with one..

-children will always be forgiven for causing untold death and ruin, as it's usually their fault.

-children (usually the same ones who started the terror) will often be the only ones capable of saving the earth.

-women find insults and degradation not only sexy, but marriage-motivating.

-after discovering the only thing that will kill the monsters/aliens/whatever, actually using it on them and saving more lives can often wait, if more science things can be put around a lab.

-cops are generally useless, as is the military. scientists of any type, sports stars, or children are key to any successful world-saving.

-if an alien comes in peace, it either has a sinister secret reason, or has one minor detail, usually involving the gradual extinction of the human race.

-the only animals known to man are cats, dogs, and birds. everything else is monstrous and confusing.

-Any Alien civilization is no match for two or three American Astronauts..

- Whenever your ship crashes on an Alien planet, one crew member is legally obligated to die right away. It is also strongly suggested that one member go insane, or become treacherous and anti-social..

- The leading man is required to wax philosophical while smoking a cigarette at least twice..

- Whenever a woman is attacked she must never try to run or defend herself. She must instead throw her arm over her eyes and scream. This is known as the ostrich defense..

- When a man is killed, he must shout, Noooooo! At some point. This is non-negotiable..

- If you're a Mad Scientist your unstoppable monster must turn on you at some point. He will then either die with you in a moment of high drama, or be stopped by an incredibly simple method you can't believe it took two hours to think up..

This is fun, Chico! Great idea!

-vegetables, fruits, and animals every now and then will realize their lot in life and rebel against all humans.

-while the future of the year 2000 will have robots doing all the menial tasks, flying cars, and resorts on other planets, the robots are the only things that can possibly go wrong.

-the earth's core actually made of ice.

-while you can never dig deep, the earth is hollow and home to many different species, such as mole people, dinosaur people, tribal folk, and fire toads.

-whether the centre of the earth is ice or not, the area will still be lit up nicley, as centrifugal force with make lava also flow along the ceiling. (from "At The Earth's Core")

-standing on clouds isn't entirely uncommon and is quite possible.

-if you win a contest that involves going to a house on a hill, an abandoned hospital, or any other such forboding areas, it's haunted and deadly.

-it isn't uncommon for aliens to look exactly like humans.

-it isn't uncommon for aliens to looks unsettlingly like reproductive organs.

-when in doubt for a way to stop monsters, throw food at them, play music, or really, any random thing you can think of.

-if you die while killing one monster, not only will you end up destroying all the other monsters, you'll be known forever as a hero.

-drunks make good monster bait.

- If you are a priest or a New York Cop you must sport a bad Irish accent..

- All minorities are just thrilled to death with menial jobs and are happy to serve as a comic foil for "Whitey."

- If you need to look extra thoughtful you will automatically be able to materialize a pipe from nowhere, even if you don't smoke the entire rest of the movie..

- NASA does most of thier work with pick-up trucks(Another Night of The Blood Beast thing)

- All Astronauts must pretend not to notice the wire attached to thier rocket..

- Any Mexican will automatically be a bad guy with a huge frightening mustache..

- If you're British you must remain reserved and proper at all times, even while being killed..

- John Carradine or Donald Pleasance must appear in 1 out of every 5 movies(at the minimum)

- Always program your killer robot so that one button push or verbal cue can make it turn on you..

- Negative scratches are every bit as deadly as bullets or lasers..