1. Remake of "Roots" starring Michael Jackson

2. Performance of "The Nutcracker" by the Bolshoi Ballet with special guest Hillary Clinton

3. The Martha Stewart WWF Smackdown

4. Any sitcom starring Emeril Lagasse

5. Jerry Falwell napping with a Teletubby stuffed toy

6. Any day in the life of the British royalty

7. Ricky Martin in a tasteful, hot pink, off-the-shoulder number

8. Bill Gates on a Harley Davidson

9. Yet another commercial starring Carrot Top

10. Osama bin Laden in a Christian Science bookstore

Perfect title Al; surreal, scary or stupid is right