Mega moron awards
MEGA MORON AWARDS
Tennessee: A man successfully broke into a bank after hours and stole the bank's video camera, while the camera was remotely recording. (That is, the videotape recorder was located elsewhere in the bank, so he didn't get the videotape of himself stealing the camera).
Louisiana: A man walked into a Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer? Fifteen dollars. [If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, was a crime committed?]
Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. Seems the liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass. The whole event was caught on videotape.
New York: As a female shopper exited a convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police had apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes Officer..that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."
Ann Arbor:The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 12:50am, flashed a gun and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
Kentucky: Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove home. With the chain still attached to the machine. With their bumper still attached to the chain. With their vehicle's license plate still attached to the bumper.
Full Version: Moron awards
If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, was a crime committed?
yep gun possesion 
Heh, the one from Ann Arbor's my favorite.
I second that. Ann Arbor is great. Though Kentucky made me laugh like crazy....
Bah!
My moronosity far exceeds these rank amatuers!
You hear about people asking fat women if they are pregnant? Well, have you actually done it? Twice? Not purposefully?
Have you ever told your male boss he had a "perky" arse?
Have you ever mistaken another person at a restaurant for a waiter?
Have you ever tried opening your monitor in an attempt to locate your C drive?
What about being in a foreign country and asking one of the locals where they're from?
Rookies.
I am Lord of the Morons.
My moronosity far exceeds these rank amatuers!
You hear about people asking fat women if they are pregnant? Well, have you actually done it? Twice? Not purposefully?
Have you ever told your male boss he had a "perky" arse?
Have you ever mistaken another person at a restaurant for a waiter?
Have you ever tried opening your monitor in an attempt to locate your C drive?
What about being in a foreign country and asking one of the locals where they're from?
Rookies.
I am Lord of the Morons.
Great! Thanks for a good laugh.
QUOTE(Mad Manfred @ Dec 16 2004, 03:41 AM)
Bah!
My moronosity far exceeds these rank amatuers!
You hear about people asking fat women if they are pregnant? Well, have you actually done it? Twice? Not purposefully?
Have you ever told your male boss he had a "perky" arse?
Have you ever mistaken another person at a restaurant for a waiter?
Have you ever tried opening your monitor in an attempt to locate your C drive?
What about being in a foreign country and asking one of the locals where they're from?
Rookies.
I am Lord of the Morons.
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My moronosity far exceeds these rank amatuers!
You hear about people asking fat women if they are pregnant? Well, have you actually done it? Twice? Not purposefully?
Have you ever told your male boss he had a "perky" arse?
Have you ever mistaken another person at a restaurant for a waiter?
Have you ever tried opening your monitor in an attempt to locate your C drive?
What about being in a foreign country and asking one of the locals where they're from?
Rookies.
I am Lord of the Morons.
[right][snapback]406358[/snapback][/right]
These are great, you win!
ROTFL ... VERY funny thread 
QUOTE
Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. Seems the liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass. The whole event was caught on videotape.
Could you imagin that guy's face when the cinder block BOUNCED and came back flying at him? rofl
hahaha, that was awesome.
so you mean the Charles Darwin awards????
well, here is one....i guy tried to break the world record of fastest run down a incline...the incline was at i think 80 degrees. he broke the record alright, but he was running so fast he couldn't stop and he killed himself...
well, here is one....i guy tried to break the world record of fastest run down a incline...the incline was at i think 80 degrees. he broke the record alright, but he was running so fast he couldn't stop and he killed himself...
The stupidity of criminals is always so obvious and so damn funny as well, they can provide us with hours of entertainment!
I'd like to offer an award to monkeymanz89 for his outstanding performance in pissing off the wrong mods tonight in more ways than thought possible, and getting himself banned. Bravo!
*WHEW* for a second, i thought this thread was about me.
QUOTE
Louisiana: A man walked into a Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer? Fifteen dollars. [If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, was a crime committed?]
we arent all like that, folks. it was probably in north louisiana, anyway, you know those rednecks........
Lol, some people are just not cut out to be criminals. What will they be like in jail? I almost feel sorry for them, lol. 
During the depression a man known as "Pretty Boy Floyd" was robbing a bank. He goes up to the counter and demands all of the money. The cashier, person, was freaked out so he started giving him the money. In the bank, there were some twins who were crying (young children). He said to the cashier,"and give me 2 lollipops". The cashier said "no my boss will be angry with me" you would think that he's giving him all of the money but not two lollipops. So he puts down a 5 and takes 2 suckers and gives them to the kids, then runs off.
Talk about morons.
Talk about morons.
QUOTE(A Believer Of The Unexplained)
During the depression a man known as "Pretty Boy Floyd" was robbing a bank.
My mom actually met him once, though she didn't find out until later who he was. He was something of a folk hero in KC.
There was a guy here working for a tree trimming outfit who actually cut off the limb he was sitting on. He had a safety line on, so he didn't get killed. Another time he climbed so high up a tree that it bent to one side under his weight and then he cut the top off. Without the added weight of the top the tree snapped back upright and catapulted him off. Again, the safety line saved him.
I wanna hear the story about Mad Manfred telling his boss he had a perky ass!!!
haha did your mom really? freaky!
QUOTE(A Believer of the Unexplained @ Dec 29 2004, 08:19 AM)
haha did your mom really? freaky!
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She had a friend whose family was friends with a man they called "Flo". This was back during the Depression and Mom and all the people she knew were pretty much poor. Anyway, "Flo" was nice to this one family and saw that they were taken care of and all. One day he was there when Mom went to visit and they introduced her. Later her friend told her not to tell anyone, but Flo was really Pretty Boy Floyd.
Mom also met Harry Truman one time, after he'd been president. She used to walk past his house on the way to the store. He had a fence of iron railings around his yard and one of my older brothers was walking along dragging has hand over the railings. Mom told him to stop. She didn't notice the President sitting on his porch until he called out to my brother to use a stick, because it would be noisier. <g>
LOL! It would be noisier lol now the US needs a President like that again...
Kryso, i LOVE the PlayStation Pic on ur sig! 
QUOTE(tiddlyjen @ Dec 29 2004, 07:54 PM)
LOL! It would be noisier lol now the US needs a President like that again...
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I'd vote for him!
Feenix Fire, *I* love the "walk a mile in his shoes" bit you have. <G>
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